DateinAsia help

[mentor]

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- I don't want kids. So, should I search only for these ones that declare 'no' kids, or maybe additionally the ones that declare 'not sure'?
YOU GOT SEVERAL REPLIES TO THIS ALREADY - VIRTUALLY ALL YOUNG ASIAN LADIES WANT KIDS, CHINA POSSIBLY LESS SO. MY BUDDY GOT DIVORCED TO HIS THAI BRIDE BECAUSE SHE CHANGED HER MIND AFTER INITIALLY TELLING HIM SHE WOULD AGREE NO KIDS. WHY TAKE THE RISK? SOME LADIES WILL TELL YOU WHAT YOU WANT TO HEAR IN THE MOMENT BUT THEY CHANGE BACK LATER TO WHAT THEIR HEART TELLS THEM.

Nice advice.


Can I have a fine tune on this?

What I mean?
It is totally clear, that I don't want kids, so I declate 'wants children:no' in my profile. Also, I am not the guy who cheats and I don't want to tell lies to girls, as I believe in mutual trust and I want long term relationship.

Selecting 'no kids' when I search girl's profiles, is the clear option. No doubt about it.
But, it leaves me with much less profiles to browse.
Of course, I want to eliminate the risk of involving with ladies that could change their mind and wanting kids. Of course, as it is already said, nobody can tell this.

But, I am thinking, instead of just browsing profiles with 'wants children: no' option,
wouldn't it be better to add to my profile a line like 'I am not thinking of having any kids in the future', and let myself browse profiles of girls with 'wants children: undecided' too?

The profiles of girls that declare 'wants children: no', will be my first priority.

But, If I let myself browse the profiles with 'wants children: undecided',
with a clear statement in my profile that I am not thinking of kids,
and in my first contact to girls I have no intention of persuade any girl to accept it, maybe this way,
I could attract the girls that declare 'wants children: undecided' but they are not stable about it.

I am totally clear.
First priority, girls with 'wants children: undecided'.
Second priority, girls, that even though I declare 'wants children: no' and a statement of 'no kids', would like to contact me, knowing my preference.

Of course there are cunning ladies, but this is true and we should pay attention to avoid them in any case.
I find it difficult, a lady that wants to connect with me, to see in my profile 'wants children: no' and a statement of 'no kids', and believe that could ever manage to handle me.

I hope you understand my thoughts and you get my point.


I really want opinions about how I am thinking to handle it.

[Lorenzo]

I think you have made this a bit more complicated than it needs to be. Undecided means she will likely want kids, that desire will always be in her heart. She is a woman...

It is not enough to say No kids in the Profile box, you must also make it clear in your written profile description. I would not bring the topic up with ladies unless they ask. Save that for later when you get a serious candidate.

Happy hunting! Keep us updated.

[mentor]

Thanks for the clarification.
Surely you are more experienced than me in these Asian topics and maybe in their psychology, so are you having any suggestion for a small phrase that could fit well, and not causing any false/negative vibes?

[mentor]

Anyone having now or in the past, long term relationship from DateinAsia?

[The_Adventurer]

I have.

Had an almost two year relationship with a girl from a well off family. All had cars, even teenage siblings, owned properties and small businesses etc. Not hot, for what this board goes for. Cute face, chubby, glasses. Was the nicest, sweetest, most caring person I ever met in my life. Was a bit clingy.

To this day I still have some regrets about ending it.

We are always still in good contact, so who knows...

[mentor]

I have.

Had an almost two year relationship with a girl from a well off family. All had cars, even teenage siblings, owned properties and small businesses etc. Not hot, for what this board goes for. Cute face, chubby, glasses. Was the nicest, sweetest, most caring person I ever met in my life. Was a bit clingy.

To this day I still have some regrets about ending it.

We are always still in good contact, so who knows...

Nice to hear such news.
How you did it, from the time you saw her in DateinAsia?
How did you approach her, contact/meet/being together?

[The_Adventurer]

I was already there, so I search only girls in my immediate area. I met many. It quickly move over to phone and text conversations.

We arranged a meeting at a nearby SM Mall in a coffee shop and hang out for a while. It seems good. We continue to text a lot.

Next meeting was also at a mall. She bought me a shirt. We also go out to eat. That evening was back to my place. After that she comes over to hang out regularly. She quickly made me cut contact with the other girls I had met on DateinAsia. There was some drama with one of the other girls who really liked me got a hold of her number and Facebook, and continuously bothered her, trying to take me from her.

Soon after I visit her family. I stay 2 or 3 days. Awesome food, lots of fun people and a talking bird.

Not long after we are living together.

[mentor]

Many girls thank me for just visiting their profiles!
How do you think about it?

[Lorenzo]

Many girls thank me for just visiting their profiles!
How do you think about it?

That is to be expected, you see, Asian women are far more respectful and polite than Western women.

Hint of the day: An Asian women values a man for his integrity, honesty, caring and work ethic. If you are decent to them they all will quickly become attached to you, so be selective very early on. I think almost every Asian women I visited and dated from an online site wanted to get serious.

[mentor]

I am not having many visitors, like when I opened my account.
Any explanation of how it goes in DIA?
I do not prefer quantity over quality, in any case, but I hoped to have more visitors.
Less visitors, less approaching girls...

I observed, that if I search profiles from a specific country, the time I am online I accept visitors from that country, not many, but always even a few, I get them.

As I read in other topics, a tip is to log out when you finish browsing, and I do it.

I do not know if I understand well, but it seems that the whole game require more action from us (something like hunting), and the girls seem to have a more pathetic role.
Of course, it is logical that we seek girls there, and we know what we want, while asia girls from their side, it is a little weird to just seek guys all over the globe, as the majority of foreigners are not located there, in their asia countries. Additionally, I think that a lot 'good' girls do not act like hunters, but rather prefer to be approached and even selected by an interesting foreigner guy.

So it seems that it is up to us to energetically involve by searching/contacting.

My initial thought came from the observation that almost 'no browsing from my side = no visitors at all'!

I would like to have your comments about these thoughts.

[Lorenzo]

I am not having many visitors, like when I opened my account.
Any explanation of how it goes in DIA?
I do not prefer quantity over quality, in any case, but I hoped to have more visitors.
Less visitors, less approaching girls...

I observed, that if I search profiles from a specific country, the time I am online I accept visitors from that country, not many, but always even a few, I get them.

As I read in other topics, a tip is to log out when you finish browsing, and I do it.

I do not know if I understand well, but it seems that the whole game require more action from us (something like hunting), and the girls seem to have a more pathetic role.
Of course, it is logical that we seek girls there, and we know what we want, while asia girls from their side, it is a little weird to just seek guys all over the globe, as the majority of foreigners are not located there, in their asia countries. Additionally, I think that a lot 'good' girls do not act like hunters, but rather prefer to be approached and even selected by an interesting foreigner guy.

So it seems that it is up to us to energetically involve by searching/contacting.

My initial thought came from the observation that almost 'no browsing from my side = no visitors at all'!

I would like to have your comments about these thoughts.

It could be a combination of factors:
- Your profile is not so attractive or compelling
- Limited inventory in DIA
- There is an expectation for men to initiate contact

Anytime you sign up on one of these sites there can be an initial flurry of activity for the newbie which dies down within a week.

You've been warned before to stop wasting time and join a Quality dating site, it will be a total game changer

[mentor]

Lorenzo, thanks for all your advice.
You seem to know well all this asia dating scene, so would you please tell me some 'key' factors/words/phrases, that would add more value to my profile?

I am looking for a stable and long-term relationship, so, I know that this procedure takes some time, I should be patient, be careful, everything should be done correctly and not in a hurry.

I prefer to attach/attract a few but pure and good hearted girls, instead of 'more' girls with 'lower' quality.

There is a lot of stuff in DIA, I do not regret involving in this site, but any advice about improving my profile (what is good to be written, etc) or approaching tactics in this online dating with good asian girls, would be valuable to me.

[Lorenzo]

I recommend the term "serious". Other key terms Asian women look for are sincere, honest, generous, caring. For example, you are "looking for a serious relationship leading to marriage. No girls playing please." This sends the message that you have the right intentions.

FYI Asian girls don't usually want to date, they want to get married. These are the better girls, they have been more conservative and are likely to be more dedicated and honest. Any girl with a tattoo in Asia is likely a whore, avoid. My last advise, speak from your heart, be open. These girls will sense your sincerity and you are more likely to attract the right ones. They love that quality.

With all this said, you seem to be too cheap or resistant to sign up for a paid Cupid site which would offer you the best prospects. If $30 is not worth the girl of your dreams, then you should not bother at all. There is a Cupid site specific for most countries and also covering pan Asia. The exception is that Cherry Blossoms seems best for the Philippines.

[mentor]

It is a matter of personal preference, that I prefer DIA.
It is not about the amount of money for other sites.
I just want to use a site, free for all. No limits to register even the poor asian girl.
In every decision, you win something and you lose something.
I don't know if I will change my mind in the future, but for now I will deal with DIA.

I an honest, and I mention the word 'serious' in my profile.
You are right about your comments for approaching good girls.
I cant' guarantee any marriage to any girl, I just want to be honest. This is something that I can examine on the way.
But, I am monogamic, I give all my care to the girl I love, and I will respect her. Maybe this is not the best scenario for a girl dreaming marriage, but I think much better from 'easy' marriages that the man f@@cks all around and give no care and respect to his own girl.
I don't want to cheat for my intentions, as I believe 'honesty is the best policy', as many girls tell in their profiles.
And as you said, being sincere, attract the right girls.

I would like a christian mate, so this is a limitation from the start. The main reservoir seems to be Phillipines. Fortunately there are thousands of profiles.
I wish I could play in other asian countries too, but phil is a completely christian country, in contrary with the neighbors.

[Lorenzo]

It is a matter of personal preference, that I prefer DIA.
It is not about the amount of money for other sites.
I just want to use a site, free for all. No limits to register even the poor asian girl.
In every decision, you win something and you lose something.
I don't know if I will change my mind in the future, but for now I will deal with DIA.

I an honest, and I mention the word 'serious' in my profile.
You are right about your comments for approaching good girls.
I cant' guarantee any marriage to any girl, I just want to be honest. This is something that I can examine on the way.
But, I am monogamic, I give all my care to the girl I love, and I will respect her. Maybe this is not the best scenario for a girl dreaming marriage, but I think much better from 'easy' marriages that the man f@@cks all around and give no care and respect to his own girl.
I don't want to cheat for my intentions, as I believe 'honesty is the best policy', as many girls tell in their profiles.
And as you said, being sincere, attract the right girls.

I would like a christian mate, so this is a limitation from the start. The main reservoir seems to be Phillipines. Fortunately there are thousands of profiles.
I wish I could play in other asian countries too, but phil is a completely christian country, in contrary with the neighbors.

I think the one false premise is your choice of dating sites. There are many more higher quality women with a better female to male ratio on some other sites. ALL of these sites are free to women. This translates into increased probability of finding the girl of your dreams and more interest. Lastly, I am not implying you offer marriage, rather you should be marriage minded...the long term goal of a serious relationship is the prospect of marriage if it works. That is want the girls want to hear.