Marrying a poor Filipina single mom

[Taco]

Do not marry single mum.Period.

These are some HA golden rules that must be followed to avoid pain in the future

I agree, all the research shows that a man getting involved with a single mother is a recipe for disaster!

She will always put her kids first AND since your not their father, you cannot discipline her kids (even raising your voice will not be allowed!)

She will only see you as a provider and nothing more (actually she will view you as a schmuck who lowered his standards and married a woman who already had kids with another man).

Personally, I wouldn't touch a single mother with a ten foot pole!

In western countries what your saying is true. However, single Filipina moms are socially marginalized much the same way that western men are so when they get together they become good friends rather quickly. Of all the women I've met in the Philippines single women without kids are the most immature and the most likely to scam you.

Sour grapes. You're just disappointed that you couldn't marry a woman with no kids, ideally a virgin. Now you're just trying to rationalize it all. Single mothers are pretty much all scammers in the sense that they're just looking for a beta sucker to raise her kids. A woman got you to raise two kids that you did not make! You might as well just marry a gold digger without kids if you are going to go down that path. That way you at least won't have to be responsible for taking care of another man's kids everyday and a gold digger will love you just as much as a single mom will, which is not at all.

I have Filipinas teens throwing themselves at me all the time and I refuse to partake of their forbidden fruit, although my expat neighbor does, he's about 60. I had tons of chances to marry young, sexy Filipinas, the fundamental problem is they can't be trusted. Ninety percent of the expats that chase Filipinas half their age don't stay with them longer than 6 months and if they do money is the only thing keeping the relationship together.

[Hero]

Well one girl i asked about blowjob (she wasn't a bargirl) cause she was laying down and she goes i gave filipino before but not foreigner (she had been with foreigner before). My bargirl used to claim filipino guys weren't into blowjobs also and only white guys were lol whatever. A lot of the bar girls have said that. I think many times its just crap they say so they dont have to give them. I bet they tell everyone to say that.

A girl who won't give a BJ, even in a serious relationship, is way too prudish for me.
I've heard stories about Filipinas who won't even let their own husbands see them naked. IMO, that's grounds for divorce.

[davewe]

Do not marry single mum.Period.

These are some HA golden rules that must be followed to avoid pain in the future

I agree, all the research shows that a man getting involved with a single mother is a recipe for disaster!

She will always put her kids first AND since your not their father, you cannot discipline her kids (even raising your voice will not be allowed!)

She will only see you as a provider and nothing more (actually she will view you as a schmuck who lowered his standards and married a woman who already had kids with another man).

Personally, I wouldn't touch a single mother with a ten foot pole!

In western countries what your saying is true. However, single Filipina moms are socially marginalized much the same way that western men are so when they get together they become good friends rather quickly. Of all the women I've met in the Philippines single women without kids are the most immature and the most likely to scam you.

Sour grapes. You're just disappointed that you couldn't marry a woman with no kids, ideally a virgin. Now you're just trying to rationalize it all. Single mothers are pretty much all scammers in the sense that they're just looking for a beta sucker to raise her kids. A woman got you to raise two kids that you did not make! You might as well just marry a gold digger without kids if you are going to go down that path. That way you at least won't have to be responsible for taking care of another man's kids everyday and a gold digger will love you just as much as a single mom will, which is not at all.

I have Filipinas teens throwing themselves at me all the time and I refuse to partake of their forbidden fruit, although my expat neighbor does, he's about 60. I had tons of chances to marry young, sexy Filipinas, the fundamental problem is they can't be trusted. Ninety percent of the expats that chase Filipinas half their age don't stay with them longer than 6 months and if they do money is the only thing keeping the relationship together.

It seems that both of you are "desperate" to justify your view. Filipinas with kids are far from one size fits all. It can be a girl who made one mistake or a girl with a lifetime of mistakes. Since most women in the culture are by definition poor, you might say that most of the girls are desperate, whether they have kids or not. But is their desperation what makes a good partner? I don't think so.

The same generalizations hold true for childless, single Filipinas. So what is the theory - that because she has no kids, she is less desperate and therefore more likely to be a scammer? Makes no sense. Of course many are scammers - both with kids and without. But guys who have lived there generally come to the conclusion that while scammers are plentiful most girls are sincere and want a real partner.

I know dozens of Fil-Am couples, both in the US and in PI. Most of the couples have significant age differences of 10 or more years. One couple has about 40 years difference. Most have been married awhile - 5-10 years. Most seem very happy, far happier than similar American couples. Of course these are all generalizations - YMMV.

The one factor that I can say makes the biggest difference in the marital success of these guys - is not whether the girl had kids before - it is the guy himself. Mature, semi-together guys chose good women and have happy marriages; the guys who chose bad girls from scammer families - well you can figure out what happened to them.

I have nothing against the guys who go for the short term relationships - it's definitely something that can be easily done in PI. But if you are looking long term, get rid of the generalities. You already are thinking outside the box by traveling abroad. Now think a little more outside the box and look at the person and how she was brought up. That gives you the best chance at success.

[pete98146]

I'll echo Dave's comments above. Whether you want a lady with children or not is up to you. The bigger concern is choosing one that has a good head on her shoulders, comes from a stable family.

Those of us who are married to Filipinas preach to lengths end that you NEED to find a lady who will an asset to you and not a liability. Sounds as if you can have your pick of the litter. Just make sure you don't pick a "project" because you feel sorry for her. Also what is her family like? Are you now the rich kano who will be their meal ticket?

It's imperative that you use common sense when selecting your partner.

[OutWest]

I'll echo Dave's comments above. Whether you want a lady with children or not is up to you. The bigger concern is choosing one that has a good head on her shoulders, comes from a stable family.

Those of us who are married to Filipinas preach to lengths end that you NEED to find a lady who will an asset to you and not a liability. Sounds as if you can have your pick of the litter. Just make sure you don't pick a "project" because you feel sorry for her. Also what is her family like? Are you now the rich kano who will be their meal ticket?

It's imperative that you use common sense when selecting your partner.

We can have no such talk about common sense here! You want to be banned???

Merry Christmas!

[publicduende]

It makes sense to me too, and echoes with another notorious post where I was the only one assuming that single moms just don't come in the "hopeless slut who got one shot too much the wrong side of her eggs - that'll teach her!" package. That post was about American single moms, but I guess the same principle applies to Filipinas.

It is reductive and silly to label any single mom negatively. She might have been genuinely in love with a man who dumped her at the news she was pregnant, or that pregnancy might have been the cherry on top of a life of mindless cock riding, or perhaps actually quite a prudish girl whose naivety costed her big time. Or any shade of grey in between.

And please (numero dos), I have heard far, far more cases of shitty married moms who treat their kids with indifference or even abuse them, despite their motherhood being somehow socially sanctioned by the father being around. Vice-versa, there are stories (which some of you won't believe) of single moms who take on the full responsibility of bringing up a kid alone and love them to bits, going through hardship and sacrifices when necessary.

Just to report something that might ring a bell to many of you: who do we think those still presentable young single moms found in AC bars and strip clubs really are? How many of them do you think will undergo the damning routine of entertaining countless foreigners without the need to feed their children left back home with their lolas? It really doesn't take a hardcore feminist to imagine that few, very few of them would have that kind of life if they had the option of a decently paid job (which, in the Philippines, is in itself something quite ephemeral).

Hammering on pseudo-masculine stereotypes like those routinely dished out by Roosh's crew might be worth a giggle every now and then, boys will be boys and blah blah..but come on guys be honest to your intellect. You cannot be seriously entertaining the notion that a woman must receive the scarlet letter just based on the fact that she is a single mom. Human nature and human events are far more complex than that, especially in countries and societies where hardship happens to extents we spoiled Western arses cannot even begin to imagine.

And by the way, Merry Xmas all, guys! Empathy goes a long way...

[publicduende]

I doubt most of them will ever go beyond standard oral and v****al sex.

That's good enough for me First time I had a Filipina GF, I couldn't believe how much she loved giving me BJ's.

And believe me, like someone on this forum recently said, once a Filipina has the problem of having herself and her close family well fed out of the way, it's surprising how adventurous and kinky they can be. I still have very "special" memories of the Pinay I met in China a few years ago. Nothing sexually violent or degrading happened between us, but she taught me that the apartment of her sexual fantasies had not one spare room, but a whole hidden basement full of toys

[OutWest]

I doubt most of them will ever go beyond standard oral and v****al sex.

That's good enough for me First time I had a Filipina GF, I couldn't believe how much she loved giving me BJ's.

And believe me, like someone on this forum recently said, once a Filipina has the problem of having herself and her close family well fed out of the way, it's surprising how adventurous and kinky they can be. I still have very "special" memories of the Pinay I met in China a few years ago. Nothing sexually violent or degrading happened between us, but she taught me that the apartment of her sexual fantasies had not one spare room, but a whole hidden basement full of toys

...Yes...what he said....

and a Merry Christmas to you!

[Ghost]

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[The Professor]

don't stay with them longer than 6 months and if they do money is the only thing keeping the relationship together.

I'm sure you're right, but I'm sure your marriage is no different. The only reason your Filipina wife is with you is for money and your willingness to raise her kids. That's all she sees you for. AWALT.

[Taco]

don't stay with them longer than 6 months and if they do money is the only thing keeping the relationship together.

I'm sure you're right, but I'm sure your marriage is no different. The only reason your Filipina wife is with you is for money and your willingness to raise her kids. That's all she sees you for. AWALT.

No she wants me for sex too. Raped the hell out of me on Christmas day.

[newlifeinphilippines]

don't stay with them longer than 6 months and if they do money is the only thing keeping the relationship together.

I'm sure you're right, but I'm sure your marriage is no different. The only reason your Filipina wife is with you is for money and your willingness to raise her kids. That's all she sees you for. AWALT.

No she wants me for sex too. Raped the hell out of me on Christmas day.

Really? Initiating is a good sign. My hoe would screw me as much as i wante and pretended to love it BUT most of the time i initiated and if i didn't i would go without LOL maybe cause of her ego and partly cause she didn't give a shit about me.

How can we find one of these naturally nympho girls is there any telltale signs will they sleep with you fast? I dont want no slut though that will cheat around though

[Taco]

don't stay with them longer than 6 months and if they do money is the only thing keeping the relationship together.

I'm sure you're right, but I'm sure your marriage is no different. The only reason your Filipina wife is with you is for money and your willingness to raise her kids. That's all she sees you for. AWALT.

No she wants me for sex too. Raped the hell out of me on Christmas day.

Really? Initiating is a good sign. My hoe would screw me as much as i wante and pretended to love it BUT most of the time i initiated and if i didn't i would go without LOL maybe cause of her ego and partly cause she didn't give a shit about me.

How can we find one of these naturally nympho girls is there any telltale signs will they sleep with you fast? I dont want no slut though that will cheat around though

You just need a plane ticket to Cebu.

[C.J.]

There are only two rules in Happier Abroad Club:

1. You don't marry single moms.

2. YOU DON'T MARRY SINGLE MOMS!

I'm not even considering single moms from ANY country now. It's pretty obvious why. They're gonna put their kids/their welfare before you, until you can give them enough cash to put YOU first. I only had to get burned by a filipina SM to figure that out.

[Taco]

There are only two rules in Happier Abroad Club:

1. You don't marry single moms.

2. YOU DON'T MARRY SINGLE MOMS!

I'm not even considering single moms from ANY country now. It's pretty obvious why. They're gonna put their kids/their welfare before you, until you can give them enough cash to put YOU first. I only had to get burned by a filipina SM to figure that out.

I'm sorry to hear of your misfortune. In the Philippines you need to pick girlfriends on the basis of honesty before anything else. If you can't trust your Filipina your really screwed because you won't be able to trust anyone else in this country.

My expat neighbor(60yr old) cheats on his 35 yr old Filipina girlfriend with 18 yr olds. In return, his girlfriend has a Filipino boyfriend that also cheats on her with 18 yr old Filipinas. There's no end to the lying, cheating and fornicating in the Philippines so be careful. You want to be thinking very clearly when you choose a girlfriend in any country.