Vietnam Pros and Cons

[ladislav]

I just got an email from an expat who had spent time in VN. Here is a down and dirty on it:

"Positives of Vietnam

Friendly and down to earth people
Excellent food
Sleepy vibe
Great atmosphere
Good amenities in the big cities
Relatively convenient
Progressive and inclusive (HCMC)

Negatives of Vietnam

Difficult and expensive visas
Rude, conservative feminist women**
Bad dating all around
Small sized expensive accommodation usually
Not much English spoken
Healthcare is expensive / not great
Greedy locals
Too many foreigners (TEFL)
Dangerous motorbike culture

..the 2 biggest negatives are the hard limited visas and the rude closed minded boring cold childish xenophobic women. The dating scene here can really sour your experience with everything else.."

[Mickey Jaxxon]

Thanks for posting my email, Ladislav.

If anyone has any questions about Vietnam let me know. Nice country with nice people and easy lifestyle.

[fschmidt]

the rude closed minded boring cold childish xenophobic women. The dating scene here can really sour your experience with everything else.."

I assume this means they aren't sluts, which I would count as a positive.

[ladislav]

Vietnam feels like a North Asian country, not SE Asian. The people look like Chinese, Japanese, Korean type. Very active people, also.

To me, the whole former French Indo-China urban scene looks really beautiful thanks to the French city planning. Wide avenues, parks, parkways with a park in the middle section of a road and gorgeous buildings. Cambodia also looks beautiful because of the French infrastructure.

Same in Odessa, Ukraine. You have this gorgeous French city, so you can devote hours to walking around and admiring the architecture.

That is also a plus, as you can just take long walks and everything looks great.

[ladislav]

Getting married in Vietnam is a big PITA. I got this from:
https://www.tripadvisor.com/ShowTopic-g ... _City.html

"First, you have to go to your states marriage burreau to get certified that you are legally single, also all divorce papers have to be certified as well...and not just your usual notarization my friend but a special one for international use, and this COSTS! Here, in Nevada it came out to 15 usd a page.

You are lucky if you are really in Michigan it is only at that time a 1 usd a page. Anyway

Not only must you be certified single, you have to go to a psychologist to be certified by him/her as free of all mental problems.

Also, you have to be certified free of STDS, Once you have all the necessary paper work internationally certified, you have to send your packet to the US State department for THEIIR Stamp of approval... And that costs per page too, I dont know what the current price is but at my time in 2007 it was 5 usd a page. Oh yes, depending on how you and your lady friend met...did you go thru a 'marriage broker' ie, one of the online dating/marriage sites? Then YOU, Dear boy have to go to your local police dept, and get certified as clear of any reports of physical violence/sexual/spousal abuse. No, I am not kidding.

Once, all this is done, and remember, your lady friend has to do the same in her country of origin. You submit this mountain to the peoples committee of her home village...and WAIT.

Providing everything comes back approved. You then have to schedule TIME to be in Vnam.

Cause, first you have to travel to her home town/village and formally be interviwed by her parents, where you ask for the honor of marrying their daughter.

When that is done, and assuming you are approved by them, then comes the engagement ceremony...and, finally a week later the wedding.

Oh, Yeah did I mention that there is a dowry involved? This is where you ceremonally give the parents a amount of money, for their child. The amount is deceided between you and your lady...before hand, and it is given to her mother as she bore the kid, right?

And, as you are a 'rich' American it will be large. My Lady, laughingly calls it 'buying the pig', as in the old days a pig was the gift not money, foreigners brought that concept to Vnam, of giving money."

[kangarunner]

I just got an email from an expat who had spent time in VN. Here is a down and dirty on it:

"Positives of Vietnam

Friendly and down to earth people
Excellent food
Sleepy vibe
Great atmosphere
Good amenities in the big cities
Relatively convenient
Progressive and inclusive (HCMC)

Negatives of Vietnam

Difficult and expensive visas
Rude, conservative feminist women**
Bad dating all around
Small sized expensive accommodation usually
Not much English spoken
Healthcare is expensive / not great
Greedy locals
Too many foreigners (TEFL)
Dangerous motorbike culture

..the 2 biggest negatives are the hard limited visas and the rude closed minded boring cold childish xenophobic women. The dating scene here can really sour your experience with everything else.."

I've been living in Vietnam on an off since 2017. I have been to HCMC (lived here), Hanoi, Vung Tau (lived here), Ba Ria (dated a girl here), Con Dao Island, Mũi Né, Da Nang (lived here), Nha Trang (lived here). I would say that outside of business, I'm fairly knowledgeable of the Vietnamese people.

Pros of Vietnam

• Beautiful coastline and top beach cities like Nha Trang and Da Nang

• Very friendly and kind people. They ALWAYS smile

• Nice, sunny weather year round with bouts of rain in some months

• Very low cost of living

• Must sees in Vietnam are : Nha Trang, Da Nang, Con Dao

Cons of Vietnam

• If you are used to Phillipines or Thailand, the dating here will be much more difficult

• Be careful not to hurt yourself as healthcare is not easily available in some places even at night

[Mickey Jaxxon]

Been coming here since 2014 / 2015 and currently live here full time. Agree with everything except cost. Cost is only low outside of Saigon ( Vung Tau, Nha Trang, Da Lat). In Saigon for a decent 1 bedroom condo (near center / no studios) with a gym and pool starts at 600 USD or you get stuck with mid rise hotel style rooms. And the women are materialistic as f**k so good luck if you have a crappy place.

Compared to TH / PH where you can easily get places that are 300 to 400 for the same quality. Portions are also abysmally tiny so forget about paying 20 cents for a sandwich or rice noodles or whatever the tourist sites say . All the food is western priced even if you sit down for seafood / snails / snack places you end up dropping 30 bucks easily unless you're a twig or something.

I've also been all over. Saigon is the only liveable city in the country. Everything else is too small or no English or too xenophobic or suited to brief jaunts. If you are married then you can consider places like Da Nang or Da Lat.

Visas are trash and very difficult. 2 year visas for married couples with 6 month check ins at the marriage registrar. Or 1 year visas for 100k USD investment lol. Or u could stick to scuttling across the Cambodian border every 3 months to reset your tourist visa with a huge risk. Plus after Corona that's going to change anyway for the worse.

Everything is state owned so there are no price caps. So despite advertised rates you can easily pay 2.3 to 3m VND (up to 150 dollars) for electric or different menu sets at restaurants, stores etc. Pricing is very personal and illogical here. Cant own property freehold of course but if you want to buy it's very risky and dual pricing/ fake house deeds are abundant.

The women are rude uncultured lame materialistic usually frigid virgins but getting laid isn't too difficult and you can still find meager success. In a lot of ways it's worse than the US but coming from the p***y desert most guys will not care. Most are ugly too and as usual bombshells are reserved for rich locals.

That's just a tiny overview. I wouldn't recommend coming to VN for the women or for fun. Come here because you enjoy the culture and have a connection to the people / lifestyle.

[kangarunner]

The women are rude uncultured lame materialistic usually frigid virgins but getting laid isn't too difficult and you can still find meager success. In a lot of ways it's worse than the US but coming from the p***y desert most guys will not care. Most are ugly too and as usual bombshells are reserved for rich locals.

Wow on this. Completely disagree. It sounds like you have had some bad experiences.

[Mickey Jaxxon]

It's just my opinion buddy. There are some good women here obviously but that's the general trend. Noticing it's hard to be critical these days without being called negative or whiny or whatever. Besides I like Vietnam and I dont want it flooded with sexpat types.

[flowerthief00]

Imma weigh in on this. Most expats agree on the positives about Vietnam. The negatives are more nuanced.

Rude, conservative feminist women**

Dunno about "rude", but there are indeed conservative feminist women. They look to the USA as inspiration. One I was with the other night was telling me how she wants a future husband who will shares the household chores, wants to keep her job even after having children, and admitted that she can't cook. When it was time to pay the bill for our drinks and food, however, she left that to me. (excused herself to the bathroom at a strategic moment). The "equality when it benefits me" thing I swear have seen somewhere before.

Bad dating all around

True. The stinky part about local women typically expecting men to pay for dates isn't just the money itself. It's that they don't appreciate you. They take it all for granted, all those food and drinks they got for free. Really, how hard is it to say "thank you" when someone buys something for you?? It is the least one should do. Some do say it, but many, perhaps 50%, do not. In fact, this can happen when it's not a date. It can happen when you meet a woman as friends.

Getting a date itself is not exactly easy, but easier in Saigon than other cities, albeit Saigon girls are chubbier.
The hardest place is Da Nang.

Small sized expensive accommodation usually

VN is pretty damn cheap tho, a great place to be minimalist. Don't own property. Don't own a car, just a motorbike maybe--you don't even really need that thanks to Grab. Don't get married, don't have a family. Keep your belongings light and hop from city to city as you please. It can be done on 500 USD a month even in Saigon. Even that is like living it up compared to what the locals spend.

Not much English spoken

Plenty of young folks do speak English. The older folks not so much. If you stay in a family-run hotel the parents will have their son or daughter do negotiations in English with you.

There was only one apartment where I had trouble communicating with the staff, which was the first apartment I stayed in and my Vietnamese speaking ability was piss-poor (still is), but between Google Translate and asking local friends for help, we managed somehow.

Healthcare is expensive / not great

Also, practitioners give questionable diagnoses of rare diseases without running any tests on you, that if believed will cost you (by local standards) a pretty penny for treatment.

Greedy locals

Here is an interesting paradox. I find the locals to at times wear the greedy hat or the generous hat.

The former is worn in "opposite side" scenarios such as business transactions, including the vendor behind the bánh mì cart.

The latter is worn when you are both on the "same side" such as the stranger sitting next to you giving you his dessert or his beer in a store where you are both customers.

They seem able to switch easily from being hard and stingy and wanting to rip you off to being open and generous and wanting to share stuff with you depending on the circumstances of the relationship which dictates which "side" to view you as being on. Or is it just me?

Dangerous motorbike culture

This is the #1 worst thing about Vietnam! Traffic rules are openly violated, many busy streets don't even have traffic lights and everything is chaos, and the aggressiveness of drivers varies wildly. It is a nightmare for pedestrians. Even on sidewalks--those sidewalks that are actually usable--a motorbike may come directly at you and expect YOU to get out of the way. Every day there is a prayer of relief in my heart that I didn't get hit by a motorbike yet. Rates of accidents are high. Everyone knows it's terrible but the culture cannot be easily changed.

The dating scene here can really sour your experience with everything else.."

That is why people should not come here for dating. I recommend newcomers to VN leave behind their expectations in the ladies department, or at least keep those expectations very low. I think that is good advice for Asia generally.

[flowerthief00]

Oh, Yeah did I mention that there is a dowry involved? This is where you ceremonally give the parents a amount of money, for their child. The amount is deceided between you and your lady...before hand, and it is given to her mother as she bore the kid, right?

He must have meant to say "brideprice" not "dowry". Dowry is bestowed by the bride's parents to the groom or to the bride. (when it goes to the bride it is like an early inheritance) In fact Vietnam has both practices in their culture and they may observe one or the other or neither at all. Traditionally, the dowry would be smaller than the brideprice and sometimes financed by the brideprice, lol.

[ladislav]

How much is an average brideprice for an average girl? Please give a range.

[Traveler]

"Rural Chinese Men Are Buying Vietnamese Brides For $3,200...

"The typical cost for a Vietnamese woman is 20,000 yuan ($3,200), Linqi residents said -- less than a quarter of the local price, and such a bargain that more than 20 Vietnamese women have found homes in the area in recent years."
https://www.businessinsider.com/rural-c ... 200-2014-8

[flowerthief00]

How much is an average brideprice for an average girl? Please give a range.

As with wedding costs it can vary quite a bit. It could be 5000 USD. It could be 0. Whatever everyone agrees on.

I could be wrong but I think that in the year 2020 the more progressive families are observing brideprice only as a symbolic ritual, like the American family that stuffs money in stockings on Christmas for their children who are already grown up and stopped believing in Santa Claus long ago. But others might still view it as a business transaction.

If you are being asked to pay thousands of dollars, that ain't a symbolic ritual. That is a business transaction. And if they are viewing it as a business transaction you probably ought to as well. Like ask the hard questions. Is she gonna be a financial asset or a financial liability to me?

[kangarunner]

You guys are talking about paying for a Vietnamese woman to be your wife?!?!? WTF.....They don't do that here. GTFO. By the way that article linked above on Chinese men buying Vietnamese women is fake news.