Philippines' killjoy truth

[Kradmelder]

So grab a bottle of prossecco and wisp them away from all the family! Then you get her outside (since its warm there you can do that unlike here in Northern Europe), make a move, kiss her and then f**k her.

Trust me there's plenty of girls who want to f**k their uncle, look here: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/why-d ... -sexy.html

I thought at your age you'd be teaching me all the tricks or two and not the other way around. Also, please do yourself a favour and increase testosterone than no *** for 90 days.

Man, you're talking straight out of a story from those "dirty comics" much en-vogue in the 30s and the 70s. Why would I want to make a move like that knowing that she is not interested, plus a few meters away from her family and our common friends. You want me deported back to Italy for lewd acts, right?

For those fantasies to take shape, assuming they would have me excited (and they don't!), I would have to be a very close presence in their families. As in, meet them several times a year in intimate situations like big multi-day multi-family reunions. "Tito" is just an endearing term that implies familiarity and respect. It doesn't mean I am any close to be a real uncle.

Precisely because you're not my age, you're spouting over the top fantasies

My testosterone levels are right where they should be, trust me on that pal.

You said it yourself. You are Italian. So your options are live with mama or surrender. Raise the white Italian flag, mama mia. The best option available is conquer 18 year olds, or ethiopia. Any white man wit R100 can do that. But who would want to? I can just imagine how someone who still bleeds green for not being ripe would go down with Mama.

[Shemp]

If publicduende really wants a relationship with highly intelligent, well educated, ambitious young women from upper middle class families, he should probably forget marriage and position himself as a mentor type. That's what those girls want. An older man who can offer things a younger man can't (I'm not taking about money), who she goes with for a few months to a few years, and eventually ditches when she meets a guy her own age to marry and have children with. Getting closer to her family is exactly the wrong strategy, since this sort of relationship is probably something she will want to keep hidden. (So do the girl a favor and don't plaster her photos all over HA.)

[eurobrat]

Man, you're talking straight out of a story from those "dirty comics" much en-vogue in the 30s and the 70s. Why would I want to make a move like that knowing that she is not interested, plus a few meters away from her family and our common friends. You want me deported back to Italy for lewd acts, right?

For those fantasies to take shape, assuming they would have me excited (and they don't!), I would have to be a very close presence in their families. As in, meet them several times a year in intimate situations like big multi-day multi-family reunions. "Tito" is just an endearing term that implies familiarity and respect. It doesn't mean I am any close to be a real uncle.

Precisely because you're not my age, you're spouting over the top fantasies

You're not gonna get deported for kissing a young girl and making some moves. Dude you need some self-confidence, you sound like an 80 year old man.

Otherwise what it sounds like is you're just going to continue to accept what life keeps throwing at you.

[Shemp]

@publicduende: I know you're not likely to listen to eurobrat, but just in case you have a moment of weakness and ask for advice and he pops up again, remember that you really don't want to add being the laughingstock of Davaos to your other burdens.

[publicduende]

You can hop between sisters. You can't go from mother to daughter or daughter to mother. It is either or. There is a barrier in place. This is probably why. If the mother likes you, the daughters and nieces are forbidden from crossing that line.

You guys cracked the code and he never even saw it. He needs to learn some game and about placing himself in the best position possible, which means not flirting with the mother hen while trying to score with her baby chicks.

You should get back to porn dude. Abstinence is letting your mind spin too quick, too far

You've probably seen a few of the clips I've starred in you dirty bastard

[Kradmelder]

Man, you're talking straight out of a story from those "dirty comics" much en-vogue in the 30s and the 70s. Why would I want to make a move like that knowing that she is not interested, plus a few meters away from her family and our common friends. You want me deported back to Italy for lewd acts, right?

For those fantasies to take shape, assuming they would have me excited (and they don't!), I would have to be a very close presence in their families. As in, meet them several times a year in intimate situations like big multi-day multi-family reunions. "Tito" is just an endearing term that implies familiarity and respect. It doesn't mean I am any close to be a real uncle.

Precisely because you're not my age, you're spouting over the top fantasies

You're not gonna get deported for kissing a young girl and making some moves. Dude you need some self-confidence, you sound like an 80 year old man.

Otherwise what it sounds like is you're just going to continue to accept what life keeps throwing at you.

Just today I heard again Italians are not really white. I never used to believe it. Now when i read this kak I believe it. It is like some kaffir wanting to big chief and marry the village virgin to make kids. But that virgin has to pomp every amadoda in the village to get pregnant.

I dated an italian girl once. North italy, All blonde sisters. Just something not quite right. And the emotional outbursts. it just isnt white.

[publicduende]

something like this?
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-anIiw1bA_tw/U ... nay+13.jpg

This is she.

[publicduende]

Just today I heard again Italians are not really white. I never used to believe it. Now when i read this kak I believe it. It is like some kaffir wanting to big chief and marry the village virgin to make kids. But that virgin has to pomp every amadoda in the village to get pregnant.

I dated an italian girl once. North italy, All blonde sisters. Just something not quite right. And the emotional outbursts. it just isnt white.

If a society should have a deep-seated identity crisis, I can't think of South African better. Italians are Italians, we have been a mongrel culture for almost a millennium.

[Kradmelder]

something like this?
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-anIiw1bA_tw/U ... nay+13.jpg

This is she.

No tits. will never breed strong white kids. Wont even breed italians

[Rock]

"all I am asking is for a girl who has completed a degree in a decent university and is at least on a good track to find a job. I am not looking for Angel Locsin, I am looking for a girl who is not going to be the target of starting, giggling or snubbing behaviour when we go out."

Are you sure about the above? It seems sometimes that you are looking for more than just that...

Some off the cuff thoughts and opinions which I hope may at least give you some useful food for thought...

- About age gaps: If you are looking for late teens/early twenties girls, I think it's like this. There is a small subset of young girls who are genuinely more attracted to mature men. This cuts through various social classes too and does not just apply to Pinays. The most common default for this segment is girls up to say around 23 being most attracted to the 30 something men. That means 30-40 is the sweet spot which can probably be extended to decent chance if you look like you're in the 25-45 range (very mature 25 year old or very youthful 45 year old at the extremes). The first girl I seriously dated here (Ava Paige) and the one I'm currently dating both fall into this category I believe. And both were 19 when I first met them. How big is this subset? Maybe 1%, 5%, 10%, who knows. But it exists and I've met quite a few from it, some were rather attractive even by Asian standards too

The problem with the girls in the middle, upper middle, and privileged classes is that even if they are curious or interested, they may feel fear or shame in dating you the older western man. So there is a barrier which you must as the man figure out ways to navigate. In case of Ava Paige and current girl, family resisted me and created challenges. This will generally be much less of an issue with lower tier/poorer/less educated typically morena/native/exotic type girls.

If you appear to be pushing elderly or if you are an unkempt out of shape middle aged guy, good luck. I rarely meet women of any age who are attracted to these sorts. At best, some women claim that they absolutely don't care about physical form and age as long as the guy is really good to them, sincere, and does not scare them or is not from certain undesirable races/ethnicities/backgrounds (varies somewhat depending on girl).

Now if you have a second feature which the woman who likes mature men is also attracted too, then you're chances are really quite decent if you are a well kept 25-45 year old looking guy. Believe it or not, there are still some girls who prefer white guys. Some dream of cute mixed kids and some are just more attracted to that type. Again, Ava Paige and my current fell/fall within this space. Others would be thrilled with a slightly over the hill Korean guy who's still decent looking thanks to the wonders of K-Pop.

Remember, as an average western foreigner, you are also on average richer, taller, lighter skinned, more intelligent, and dare I say more pogi/gwapo than average Pinoy. Men who possess more of these qualities are generally more attractive to women. What percentage of women are attracted to poorer, shorter, darker, dumber, and more plain looking guys??? So consider some or all of those as your compensating factors for being older, outsider, lacking in local language and culture skills, etc.

- Unfortunately, white men in the Philippines have somehow managed to secure a lower rung in the apparent social pecking order of polite Filipino society. A great place to people watch is Angeles City Pampanga and it's SM Clark Mall plus the surrounding area extending to Fields Ave. You see a fair number of attractive young Pampangan maidens around and about. They are roaming the mall or in certain hotel, waitress, and staff jobs for the business that serve the mongers along Fields/Perimeter. But if they are with a man, he's invariably another Pampangan Pinoy. Then you've got the Visayan girls predominantly from Leyte and Samar who work directly in the bar industry at some capacity. These are the girls you usually see with foreigners young and old, even with the many Koreans. Sure there is a loose pecking order of sorts. The younger, taller and more attractive Visayan girls are more likely to be seen with the younger Koreans or sometimes better looking western guys. But these girls are still outsiders and far from the first tier in looks or social class. The most common match you see involves a late 30s to late 40s western guy with a 5 foot flat darker morena wearing super high heels and cheap fashion taste. She's most likely a single mom too. Majority of the Pampangans probably don't much to do with these foreigners at a social level for obvious reasons.

You see that same dynamic to various degrees in different parts of Philippines. I can't remember how many times girls up here in Metro Manila have asked me why it is that western guys are into exotic dark even ugly lower class local girls and sometimes girls who look childlike. It's so bad that at times when I've expressed interest in a taller and lighter skinned girl, she's told me that she didn't imagine that a white guy would find her attractive. Local, Arab, NE Asian, even black guys perhaps, but not a white guy lol.

Given the above, there exists a real stigma in the minds of some Pinays regarding dating white guys, especially 'ewww' older white guys lol. As you move up the social classes, the stigma becomes more apparent and widespread. We white guys in Asia have really done a number on ourselves.

- PD whether you know it or not, when you date those poor often single mom super young morenas in your backyard, you are taking risks. The more it becomes known in your small world of Davao, the more your social stock goes down. Maybe people know more about you then they let on, just a hunch. I may be totally wrong on this so please don't take it the wrong way. You seem, at some levels, to be angling for a young hottie from the upper tiers of Davao in spite of what you stated which I pasted in bold at top. To achieve this given your age and status as a newly arrived foreigner (under 2 years on the ground) is extremely difficult in what appears to be a very closed and judgmental environment of Davao's more respectable circles. If word gets around that you date and mingle with the more desperate masa class girls who happen to be teens/early 20s, wouldn't this be the final nail in the coffin or perhaps you gave up long ago?

- Male ego: I guess most of us wanna be 'the man'. The youngest hottest and most desirable women should throw themselves at us or at least be readily available when we want them. We men age like wine right? As middle age sets in and the grey hairs start appearing (assuming we still have our hair lol), we become worldly sophisticated interesting men. Young women in the Philippines crave us right? It's only natural, especially since we are clever rich white men from the mid to upper tiers of the first world. So we can snag those late teens/early 20s classy light skinned tall educated sexy Pinays and show all the losers back home in the real world that we really did it. Ah if only it were that easy. These damn egos really get in the way of achieving true fulfillment I believe. Instead of worrying about what we like, we feel shame when we find out that locals snicker at us or what the boys back home might say not to mention fellow HAers lol. Rock's date is fat and plain looking. Duende dates exotic morenas. The list goes on with the rest of us HAers.

From what I gather, you want a girl to like you for you right out of the box. As someone who's dated predominantly in Asia, I can tell you that there are other ways to capture an Asian woman's heart than lust/attraction at first sight. I've met so many girls in Taiwan who told me that they initially found their current serious bf/husband unattractive/unappealing or at best neutral. But thanks to his actions and efforts, they grew to love him over time. NE Asian girls are not so westernized in mind nor even are Pinays, even millennial generation. Age gaps may not be common but looks gaps abound in NE and SE Asia including Phils. Often the girl is the beauty and the guy is the beast.

You mentioned a Davao late 40s woman who seems to like you but you are into one of her adult daughters right? If I was in your shoes and there was minimal business and/or social risk, I would take her aside at an opportune time and explain to her that I was interested in dating her daughter if she and of course her daughter was open to that possibility. Assuming the mom would be ok with you if you were serious, it would take some effort and patience. But you would be amazed at how the mother's support might get you a chance with that hottie. It may be a fairly long shot. But 10 shots like that and you might just make it. Better to try than just wondering or sulking.

Back to our stubborn egos. No matter how good we were, we probably can't stay in that zone all our lives unless we die quite young. Is Sean Connery appealing at all to any young women given his aged appearance? Rewind even to him when he's 50 something and you get a different answer. Even George Clooney isn't the quite the man he used to be. So it behooves us to adjust our expectations as we progress through life. Nothing personal. Nature just deteriorates our physical forms so we shouldn't attach our egos to these frail bodies which house our souls for a few decades. Seek spiritual related avenues for new possibilities and horizons.

Coming back to earth, If you are getting older, consider what compensating factors you bring to the table. Is it really so shameful to close the gap with superior economic benefits or outright sugar daddying as you really get older (assuming you wanna stick with your 18-23 year olds)? Even if money or passport was initial door opener, it's possible that girl will over time come to genuinely love you if you fit her in right way emotionally, and as a man (and part of that comes down to how you behave in the relationship). Unless you are a one-in-a-million dynamic charismatic man, that's probably what it comes down to as you get much older but wanna stick with girls in their prime. Accept it by adjusting your expectations and actions accordingly. Otherwise maybe date girls closer to your your own age, or patiently wait for your sex drive to decline enough so that it no longer matters lol.

- Patience: I wanna get opinions from the happily married to Pinay boys on the forum. Should a guy be willing to wait at least many weeks or even months for sex from a respectful decent attractive young provincial Pinay whom they are courting with view to LT rel/marriage? What if she's a virgin? IMO, if you expect sex within first date or two ala Will N. Dowd, you are filtering for the less respectable higher risk element as far as finding a trustworthy life mate is concerned. But that's just my view. Others care to chime in?

[eurobrat]

something like this?
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-anIiw1bA_tw/U ... nay+13.jpg

This is she.

No tits. will never breed strong white kids. Wont even breed italians

Where did this guy come from?

[publicduende]

No tits. will never breed strong white kids. Wont even breed italians

Whiteys are so overrated...

She is angel...

[publicduende]

Where did this guy come from?

I am getting convinced he's actually Irizarry on a bike and a Saffa accent.

[Kradmelder]

something like this?
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-anIiw1bA_tw/U ... nay+13.jpg

This is she.

No tits. will never breed strong white kids. Wont even breed italians

Where did this guy come from?

From a very white area where even your oma would approve of and wish you had gone that way, raising good white kids rather than coloureds with no euro christian tradition . But meh if you want to throw 100 000 years of the struggle of your ancestors away just to stick your dick in black brown or yellow go ahead. Im sure most black brown and yellow feel the same as me.

[eurobrat]

...

Great post, I read it from start to finish. I think PD should keep making some approaches, fail a few times, adjust his approaching and carry on for success.

Me and Jester currently placed a bet to see who can approach 100 chica's in 2017, would like to invite PD to do the same. That means no more sniper rifle game or whatever you were doing.