How stable is the family structure in the Philipines

gmm567 · Post by **gmm567** » March 9th, 2009, 9:00 am

We know that divorce is not allowed.....so there is no formal record of the collapse of the marital relationship.

So how many do you think get married and stay married? Are most philipinos technically divorced and separated living apart. Lots of single mothers.

gmm567 · Post by **gmm567** » March 10th, 2009, 5:41 pm

oh I guess I asked this question before. It shows that it is on my mind

ladislav · Post by **ladislav** » March 10th, 2009, 7:38 pm

1) The country is Catholic. So, it promotes family.
2) There is no birth control. People create large families. They usually stay together to raise them.
3) Most people are poor. They cannot afford to quit families, divorce and start all over again. The rich can have lovers on the side, maybe get divorced, separate, etc, but not the poor ones.
4) The church and religious beliefs are quite strong. People are taught that divorce/ annulment, etc are bad.

The combination of Catholicism and bad economy keeps families together for the most part. Separations and annulments would probably be in less than 10%, my guess.

gmm567 · Post by **gmm567** » March 10th, 2009, 8:19 pm

yea, I am hearing that...and much of it, quite frankly, is probably for the good.

But I just wonder that there is more to those perceptions. And how can you get a fix on what's really going on.What percentage are living apart but not divorced--cause they can't get a divorce. But fundamentally , they have split.

The average philipino women has 2.3 kids. They aren't having large families any more. Family planning is on TV, inspite of the Pope--god bless that man anyway. I do respect him even though I totally disagree with him on that narrow but important issue. That stat on births may be from the Cia world fact book I can't remember , but the source was authoritative. They aren't having large families

ladislav · Post by **ladislav** » March 11th, 2009, 6:03 am

gmm567 wrote:yea, I am hearing that...and much of it, quite frankly, is probably for the good.

But I just wonder that there is more to those perceptions. And how can you get a fix on what's really going on.What percentage are living apart but not divorced--cause they can't get a divorce. But fundamentally , they have split.

The average philipino women has 2.3 kids. They aren't having large families any more. Family planning is on TV, inspite of the Pope--god bless that man anyway. I do respect him even though I totally disagree with him on that narrow but important issue. That stat on births may be from the Cia world fact book I can't remember , but the source was authoritative. They aren't having large families

Well, I keep running into all these 19 year old girls with 4-5-7 siblings. Oh, well. I guess it would be a good question to ask Filipinos at answers.yahoo.com in the travel- asia- philippines section.

Raja · Post by **Raja** » March 11th, 2009, 6:12 am

I think your numbers are flipped, I think its 3.2 live births per filipina. Family breakups are hard to count. Add the don't ask don't tell attitude towards adultary with the 10% OFW rate as a base before the officially seperated and annuled can be counted.

Mr S · Post by **Mr S** » March 11th, 2009, 6:52 am

I can probably count on my one hand how many woman I have met here that only have had 1 or 2 siblings, most have 5 or more! So whatever you read about woman only having 2 kids on average is BULLSHIT!

momopi · Post by **momopi** » March 11th, 2009, 10:57 am

Globally, there's a trend of declining birth rate in latter half of 20th century. When you look at a 30 year old and her siblings today, you have to consider the birth rate 30 years ago, not today.

The birth rate in PH was 6 children per women in 1970, declining to 3.5 child per women in 2001, to about 3 child per women in 2008.

When I was born, the birth rate in Taiwan was 4 per women. Today it's somehting like 1.18 per women.

Raja · Post by **Raja** » March 11th, 2009, 1:23 pm

momopi wrote:Globally, there's a trend of declining birth rate in latter half of 20th century. When you look at a 30 year old and her siblings today, you have to consider the birth rate 30 years ago, not today.

The birth rate in PH was 6 children per women in 1970, declining to 3.5 child per women in 2001, to about 3 child per women in 2008.

There is the possibility that the decline is just a statistical blip and is the generation which came to child bearing age under Marcos and his reforms in the birth control education arena.

I think there has been an increase in teen births as the Marcos mom's are about to enter menopause.

Mr S · Post by **Mr S** » March 11th, 2009, 5:58 pm

Walk around Makati and interview random woman and men asking them how many siblings they grew up with and I bet you anything it will be 3 or more! I still say BS... Just government political statistics BS that doesn't jive with reality there.

ladislav · Post by **ladislav** » March 11th, 2009, 10:37 pm

Mr S wrote:Walk around Makati and interview random woman and men asking them how many siblings they grew up with and I bet you anything it will be 3 or more! I still say BS... Just government political statistics BS that doesn't jive with reality there.

Now, if we view things in a relative light, any developing Catholic country will still be doing much MUCH MUCH better than over-developed countries of the West in terms of family structure. I bet one thing- if one marries a girl from a smaller town in the Philippines ( or Colombia, Mexico, Guatemala, Costa Rica, etc), 90% will be virgins, church goers, faithful to you and never initiating separations, annulments, cheatings, and other such things. If you have money and are supporting the family well and occasionally give help to others in her family, the probability of THEM leaving YOU becomes virtually nil. The main problems you will be facing is the possessiveness on their part, families always asking for ( small) assistance to help with quite legitimate things- uniforms and school fees for young members, hospital fees for older members, etc. If you get paid in dollars, you may want to have a small budget for those things which are negotiable. In return you will get protection and a pretty good family, a lot of warmth and family events and holidays, etc. Such are the rules of the game, take it or leave it. Or at best, negotiate the terms so that your contributions are lower. If they ask for $400, do not tell them to f*ck off and create an enemy( which is what many Americans are wont to do) . Tell them it is too hard but say that you can help with a smaller amount- you will end up giving them some $60 and they will still be happy.

They can bleed you dry if you let them, so think of reducing help, not eliminating it. Many Americans are absolutist in their thinking, abrupt and stubborn. SE Asians believe in compromises, negotiations, etc. One needs to play by their rules in their country. So, that seems to be the picture with such girls.

In bigger cities, the percentage of such girls falls to maybe 50-60%, which is still pretty good by Western standards because in any big city in America, Canada, UK, etc such girls will probably be in 2-3% if that much.

Most divorces, separations, annulments, cheatings in those countries are usually initiated by men- their men are immature, testosterone-filled, machisto, and just often plain unintelligent. The problem is if you live in those countries long as a man and hang out with their men, you run the risk of becoming like them.

gmm567 · Post by **gmm567** » March 12th, 2009, 10:09 pm

Well it could be S, but I wonder that there has been a change in attitudes about birth control. And these younger women are not having 6-7 kids. There mothers did. I've met a bunch on tagged who don't have kids and they are in their thirties. Maybe they are lieing, too.

ladislav · Post by **ladislav** » March 13th, 2009, 1:07 am

gmm567 wrote:Well it could be S, but I wonder that there has been a change in attitudes about birth control. And these younger women are not having 6-7 kids. There mothers did. I've met a bunch on tagged who don't have kids and they are in their thirties. Maybe they are lieing, too.

In a lot of those mixed race former Spanish colony countries, there is a glut of women. The Cathoilic faith teaches them to be virgins and to be shy and to wait until a man courts them. Even if a man does, many still reject him ( why, I don't know). Some try to help their families by working hard and taking care of mom, dad, grandma, bla bla bla. This creates a social stratum of women who become old maids and one day they wake up and they are 31 and no husband, no kids. They get desperate and start looking for guys. Most worthy guys have families already and they are grabbing sweet young 18 year olds, not 30 year olds. Economies are bad so guys with good jobs are hard to find. Anyway, lots of conditions there lead to the creation of a middle aged spinster underclass. A middle aged guy with money there is king, a 30+ girl there is a piece of garbage.
Enter the Amerikanos- the last great hope on Earth.