Marriage Reality Shows

[MrMan]

We've gotten ads from 90-Day Fiancee. I've seen bits and pieces of this, where an American dates someone online and they get married.

Many years ago, I saw much of the first season of Married and First Sight. I've seen parts of it sense. I was watching some episodes of it. You can also watch the wedding, the first couple of episodes, skipping the boring parts, and skip to the end to see who made it.

But I wonder who is unwise enough to actually get matched up on this TV show. Their divorce rates are probably a little higher than the average population, especially if you measure 7 or 10 years after being matched up. They've matched people who weren't physically attracted to each other. And the people doing the matching are a psychologist in some seasons, a sociologist, a sexologist, and a pastor.

The pastor, the way the show is edited, keeps talking about whether people are going to stay married or get divorced, asking people if they are going to stay married or get a divorce. He's a pastor, and Jesus taught against divorce. So why would he prompt people to consider divorce an option? They call the marriage an 'experiment' as if it can go either way. If I were them, I would not appreciate that, and if they asked me if I wanted to stay married or get a divorce, I'd ask the experts if they wanted to get a divorce and ask how they'd like it if I suggested to their husbands and wives to divorce them. It's like they are giving people permission to get divorced. It doesn't make sense to me, especially when the pastor is doing it.

So I was watching some episodes of seasons 12. They matched a woman up with a divorced man. That should be a disqualifier. Some people don't want to marry someone else who is divorced. The woman he married didn't care, but if they have a long line of people, why not pick some never-married people. This took them by surprised, but another guy had gotten his ex-fiancee pregnant and he has a horrible problem with his temper. But you'd think they could dig a bit and figure out the guy was very recently engaged and that he had a problem with his temper.

The 'experts' act like they want to match people up and have them be successful, and maybe they do. But I wonder if the producers think having messed up situations, like someone who is angry, got
a woman pregnant, etc. makes the show more interesting to watch. I hope that isn't the case.

The first season, a couple of the women had model good looks as far as their faces go. If they have lots of people willing to sign up, why don't they just pick 95 percentile people for looks. That way it is unlikely anyone won't experience not being attracted to their spouse. That might make for less drama, but good-looking people would probably also increase ratings, too. As it is now, some of the 'contestants' are good-looking and some are just kind of average, and the pastor tries to convince people that attraction can grow if they don't like their partner's looks. Who would sign up for that? Maybe it can work for people who do not care at all about looks, but the contestants on the show usually talk about looks.

But I don't get why people would trust 'experts' to match them up when the experts don't do any better than people do themselves using divorce rates as a metric. If they wanted to improve their match-making, they could bring the parents in and have them help the experts find a good match, interviewing prospects. Parents might spill the beans, which would ruin the secret, but they could keep this out of the editing and not let the audience know if it happens. An advantage would be the parents would be on board to offer extra support since they had a role in the matchmaking. They would also have someone who hopefully loves the person being matched up and actually knows something about their personality.

90-Day-Fiancee makes a bit more sense. It's mainly people who did online dating, but with people overseas. And they picked their fiancees out and built up a relationship online before letting the audience in. I've seen a bit of this show. That is a more normal thing in this day and age.

[redfeather]

When my wife from the Philippines and I were dating we talked to the 90 Day Fiance Show, but after they interviewed us we opted out and declined to be any part of that show because the show is heavily scripted meaning that the 90 Day Fiance producers make you build in a bunch of arguing and drama to help get their ratings up.
My filipina gf now wife get along fine with hardly no arguing, so we both did not want to have our lives turned into the hell place on earth for some shitty TV show.
I would be real careful with any of these shitty fiance shows, and understand that they heavily script the entire show to build drama and ratings.
There are now 4-5 of these fiance shows on Netflix and Prime and other channels...each with a slightly different spin.
Just be aware that they have a hidden agenda.
So, if you have a nice relationship with your filipina wife (or other foreign wife) they want to show that in a combative manner.
You have been warned.

[MrMan]

When my wife from the Philippines and I were dating we talked to the 90 Day Fiance Show, but after they interviewed us we opted out and declined to be any part of that show because the show is heavily scripted meaning that the 90 Day Fiance producers make you build in a bunch of arguing and drama to help get their ratings up.
My filipina gf now wife get along fine with hardly no arguing, so we both did not want to have our lives turned into the hell place on earth for some shitty TV show.
I would be real careful with any of these shitty fiance shows, and understand that they heavily script the entire show to build drama and ratings.
There are now 4-5 of these fiance shows on Netflix and Prime and other channels...each with a slightly different spin.
Just be aware that they have a hidden agenda.
So, if you have a nice relationship with your filipina wife (or other foreign wife) they want to show that in a combative manner.
You have been warned.

Did they offer you a lot of money? Free tickets and expenses? The cost of a wedding?

I understand if people want to be sort of social-media famous and get a lot of hits, especially if they can turn that or their exposure on TV into money by selling songs or getting a modeling contract. I notice they have had a couple of song-writers on the clips I've seen. I don't get why regular people who work as carpenters or who work in an office would go on a show that is set up to create problems in their relationship if there is no financial angle unless they just crave fame.

[redfeather]

Mr man,
Sorry for the late reply...I was out of town.

Did they offer a lot of money? No, it was only $1,500 bucks which was a joke to me...this was $1,500 for the guy and another $1,500 for his gf.
I think they did buy your plane tickets, but this was nothing to me...and another joke.
They do not pay for any weddings that I know of.

The bad thing to me was they wanted to script your relationship and build in a bunch of drama to get their TV ratings up.
Plus...the small amount of money they offered was a joke.

I am quietly married to my filipina wife, and I am going to help bring her sister here in a few years when she finishes Nursing School in the Philippines.
We have a nice married life with low drama, and we are deeply connected...way more connected than I ever was with my American wife that divorced me.
The good things that I have learned from my filipina wife are that our American culture has really destroyed American women and made it very difficult to keep/maintain a family with an American woman.
My filipina wife is super close to her family and her one brother and sisters and parents and cousins and aunts and uncles.
The other thing that was nice to see unfold...was just how easy and normal it is to move into a relationship with a good filipina woman.
When I tried to date American women it was always just a broken fubar'd mess...mainly due to the American culture brain washing them.

So, that is some information for you to think on and ponder about dating filipina women.

[publicduende]

Mr man,
Sorry for the late reply...I was out of town.

Did they offer a lot of money? No, it was only $1,500 bucks which was a joke to me...this was $1,500 for the guy and another $1,500 for his gf.
I think they did buy your plane tickets, but this was nothing to me...and another joke.
They do not pay for any weddings that I know of.

The bad thing to me was they wanted to script your relationship and build in a bunch of drama to get their TV ratings up.
Plus...the small amount of money they offered was a joke.

I am quietly married to my filipina wife, and I am going to help bring her sister here in a few years when she finishes Nursing School in the Philippines.
We have a nice married life with low drama, and we are deeply connected...way more connected than I ever was with my American wife that divorced me.
The good things that I have learned from my filipina wife are that our American culture has really destroyed American women and made it very difficult to keep/maintain a family with an American woman.
My filipina wife is super close to her family and her one brother and sisters and parents and cousins and aunts and uncles.
The other thing that was nice to see unfold...was just how easy and normal it is to move into a relationship with a good filipina woman.
When I tried to date American women it was always just a broken fubar'd mess...mainly due to the American culture brain washing them.

So, that is some information for you to think on and ponder about dating filipina women.

Hi @redfeather

I am addicted to the 90 Day Fiance franchise, it's one of my few guilty pleasures. Following the (mostly scripted) drama between unlikely couples seems to have a cathartic effect to all couples who define themselves ordinary, including those with a bride from a developing country, like myself.

I actually read on Reddit that, at least at the beginning, they were paying $2,500 per standard episode and a bit more for the final Tell All episodes. I also read that the money could only go to the American citizen, as the foreign partner had no visa and therefokre no right to work in the US. I can imagine some of those frequent restaurants rendez-vouses between cast members or their family, friends, etc are all either subsidised by TLC or negotiated for free in exchange of a couple of extra shots inside the venue.

What I am sure about is, TLC have been making tens of millions of dollars from the concept and much of the merit goes to the particularly weird couples they managed to found. Normal couples need not apply, so to speak

[MrMan]

Mr man,
Sorry for the late reply...I was out of town.

Did they offer a lot of money? No, it was only $1,500 bucks which was a joke to me...this was $1,500 for the guy and another $1,500 for his gf.
I think they did buy your plane tickets, but this was nothing to me...and another joke.
They do not pay for any weddings that I know of.

The bad thing to me was they wanted to script your relationship and build in a bunch of drama to get their TV ratings up.
Plus...the small amount of money they offered was a joke.

This does not seem like a good deal unless one is just seeking for a bit of fame. They have had a couple of musicians on the show. Maybe it gave them some exposure.