They still say it's the man's job to ask a woman out, even in America.

[Mercury]

Better be careful. If you ask a woman out and the answer is no that's sexual harassment these days. Even worse, rape by intent. At minimum you'll get sacked. At worst blacklisted and prosecuted to the full extent of the law.

Actually today, if you ask a woman out at all in the United States, it's 375 years to life in Federal prison and/or the death penalty. Enforced heavily by the FBI and the United States Department of Homeland Security. Military enforced, too.

[suprmon]

The pretense of equality at the same time as of inequality is bullshit. Pick one or the other. I don't care which.

If men and women are equals then fine. They should both at times be approaching, they should both at times be doing the asking out, they should both at times be making the next move, they should both be paying for dinners, they should both at times be leading the other, they should both at times be dealing with rejection.

If men and women are NOT equals, also fine. Men are willing to accept the greater burden in the game of courtship, but we want to be appreciated for it. Which means, among many other things, not put up on the scaffold for displaying a reasonable amount of aggressiveness in courting a woman.

Which is it, ladies? Choose one and only one.

So growup, are you saying you want an award?
I agree with you.
Women are just as capable of asking a man out. They are also just as capable of paying for a dinner, etc.
I've been both the breadwinner and the stay at home Mom during my marriage.
I understand that Mercury is tired of rejection and he is waiting for the right lady to come along, but he needs to be more realistic.
Not all of us are gold diggers who want a souped up car and a McMansion.

[suprmon]

The pretense of equality at the same time as of inequality is bullshit. Pick one or the other. I don't care which.

If men and women are equals then fine. They should both at times be approaching, they should both at times be doing the asking out, they should both at times be making the next move, they should both be paying for dinners, they should both at times be leading the other, they should both at times be dealing with rejection.

If men and women are NOT equals, also fine. Men are willing to accept the greater burden in the game of courtship, but we want to be appreciated for it. Which means, among many other things, not put up on the scaffold for displaying a reasonable amount of aggressiveness in courting a woman.

Which is it, ladies? Choose one and only one.

I agree with you.
Women are just as capable of asking a man out. They are also just as capable of paying for a dinner, etc.
I've been both the breadwinner and the stay at home Mom during my marriage.
I understand that Mercury is tired of rejection and he is waiting for the right lady to come along, but he needs to be more realistic.
Not all of us are gold diggers who want a souped up car and a McMansion.

So growup, are you saying you want an award?

[Mercury]

In Thailand, guys can ask a woman out. In America, anything between a man and a woman that is not strictly business-related is sexual harassment. In many cases, merely approaching within 75 feet of a woman is sexual harassment in and of itself.

[Mercury]

That might be the case if one is an absolute MORON. Men who know how to and actually like initiating conversations with women in whom they are interested have no irrational fear of such consequences.

To American women, it's only the case if the man was behind 9/11, the 1993 World Trade Center bombing, the 1995 Oklahoma City bombing, the bombing of Pan Am Flight 103, Air India Flight 182; to American women, guys that get in trouble for being friendly with women are worse than Adolf Hitler, Osama bin Laden, Saddam Hussein, Timothy McVeigh, Ted Bundy, John Wayne Gacy, Pontious Pilate, the men that nailed Jesus to the cross, the Japanese pilots that bombed Pearl Harbor on December 7th, 1941, the 9/11 terrorists, King Caesar of the Roman Empire, and the Egyptian Pharaoh in the time of Moses all put together.

To American women, any man who gets in trouble for approaching a woman or for being around women is grounds for a nationwide military lockdown and Martial law and is grounds for being taken out by a military air raid.

[Contrarian Expatriate]

Some guys become so paranoid that only professional counseling can get them on the path of thinking straight again. It is not difficult to see why but it, it is truly sad to see.

[E Irizarry R&B Singer]

Better be careful. If you ask a woman out and the answer is no that's sexual harassment these days. Even worse, rape by intent. At minimum you'll get sacked. At worst blacklisted and prosecuted to the full extent of the law.

Actually today, if you ask a woman out at all in the United States, it's 375 years to life in Federal prison and/or the death penalty. Enforced heavily by the FBI and the United States Department of Homeland Security. Military enforced, too.

You really are the Taco of AW social interaction.

[MrMan]

I am just responding to the title of the thread without catching up.

But how many of you men, especially you younger single men, really want outspoken fat, tattoo-covered, women with nasal hair coming up to you and asking you out? Us men should preserve this men-asking-women-out custom. If women find you attracted, chances are the unattractive ones will be attracted to you to. And if girls have to ask you out, you have to either go out with them or turn them down. Women don't take rejection like men do.

Isn't it better that you have to ask a girl out that you like than having all the unattractive women asking you out all the time? What percent of women do you find attractive? When I was on the market, it might have been 5 to 8% of young women that I'd really be interested in for looks. You might not mind if one of the pretty ones asks you out, but what about having to deal with the 95%? Now, more women so percentages would probably be worse for younger men.

If you like the average fat girl, girls asking you out may work fine, though.

[Neo]

Women can ask men out, and they often will. They just need to have the man initiate the conversation first. Then many women have no problem asking out the man. Women usually will not approach, but they sometimes ask.

The problem is sifting for quality women who aren't playing games and are humble-minded.

[Yohan]

Women can ask men out, and they often will. They just need to have the man initiate the conversation first. ...

But this is exactly the problem for many ordinary men living in Western countries.

To initiate a private conversation with a woman? Where? How? Surely not at the workplace, surely not in the street, etc.

You never know how this woman - if she knows you already from somewhere - will react when you approach her - if you fail - for example at the workplace - you might be out of job next day, or at least you will become the target of scorn by all co-workers as a loser. (happened to me when I was still living in Europe, I was still an idiot at that time many years ago)

If you approach a woman - unknown to you - you might suddenly find yourself in a hospital, as her violent boyfriends will 'protect' her, or you will be in a cell for molestering a drunk woman...or face a judge...

And don't tell me, this will and cannot happen to you. Happened to one young man I knew personally while still living in Europe, and all what he did was writing TWO times an 'unwanted' letter to her. Luckily the judge said, TWO times... but this is nevertheless not sexual harassment as he merely introduced himself in a very polite way... He got away with it...

Tell me, where and how can an ordinary man (not rich, not a thug etc. etc.) initiate a private conversation with a Western woman without putting himself on risk?

[suprmon]

The pretense of equality at the same time as of inequality is bullshit. Pick one or the other. I don't care which.

If men and women are equals then fine. They should both at times be approaching, they should both at times be doing the asking out, they should both at times be making the next move, they should both be paying for dinners, they should both at times be leading the other, they should both at times be dealing with rejection.

If men and women are NOT equals, also fine. Men are willing to accept the greater burden in the game of courtship, but we want to be appreciated for it. Which means, among many other things, not put up on the scaffold for displaying a reasonable amount of aggressiveness in courting a woman.

Which is it, ladies? Choose one and only one.

So growup, are you saying you want an award?
I agree with you.
Women are just as capable of asking a man out. They are also just as capable of paying for a dinner, etc.
I've been both the breadwinner and the stay at home Mom during my marriage.
I understand that Mercury is tired of rejection and he is waiting for the right lady to come along, but he needs to be more realistic.
Not all of us are gold diggers who want a souped up car and a McMansion.

Nobody is asking for an award, women just need to make up their minds as to what they want! The problem with most american women is that they want their cake and eat it too and life just does not work out that way! It seems american women are the ones who want an award!

[Neo]

Women can ask men out, and they often will. They just need to have the man initiate the conversation first. ...

But this is exactly the problem for many ordinary men living in Western countries.

To initiate a private conversation with a woman? Where? How? Surely not at the workplace, surely not in the street, etc.

You never know how this woman - if she knows you already from somewhere - will react when you approach her - if you fail - for example at the workplace - you might be out of job next day, or at least you will become the target of scorn by all co-workers as a loser. (happened to me when I was still living in Europe, I was still an idiot at that time many years ago)

If you approach a woman - unknown to you - you might suddenly find yourself in a hospital, as her violent boyfriends will 'protect' her, or you will be in a cell for molestering a drunk woman...or face a judge...

And don't tell me, this will and cannot happen to you. Happened to one young man I knew personally while still living in Europe, and all what he did was writing TWO times an 'unwanted' letter to her. Luckily the judge said, TWO times... but this is nevertheless not sexual harassment as he merely introduced himself in a very polite way... He got away with it...

Tell me, where and how can an ordinary man (not rich, not a thug etc. etc.) initiate a private conversation with a Western woman without putting himself on risk?

It's not about Western women vs foreign women, per se, as most believe. It is about good vs evil. There are good women, although not the majority, and there are evil women. Evil women are everywhere and live throughout the world. It's just that Western women have more power because of culture and government.

For a relationship to work, the woman must restrain herself from destroying the man. Better to find one without the inclination to destroy.

[Shemp]

Isn't it better that you have to ask a girl out that you like than having all the unattractive women asking you out all the time?

Changing the custom of who asks who out isn't going to make women interested in different men than currently. So unless you are Chad or Tyrone, you will not be asked out. Whereas Chad and Tyrone will be inundated with women asking then out, and so they will have to rudely reject most of these women in order to have some peace and quiet in their lives. This will cause the rejected women to be filled with rage, which they will vent upon the hapless betas, deltas, gammas, omegas, zetas and other letters of the greek alphabet.

Better to leave things where they are, with most lesser women daydreaming about someday being asked out by Chad and Tyrone while ignoring ordinary men. Ignoring ordinary men is much better than trying to destroy such men because of being rejected by Chad and Tyrone.

[Cornfed]

Isn't it better that you have to ask a girl out that you like than having all the unattractive women asking you out all the time?

Changing the custom of who asks who out isn't going to make women interested in different men than currently. So unless you are Chad or Tyrone, you will not be asked out. Whereas Chad and Tyrone will be inundated with women asking then out, and so they will have to rudely reject most of these women in order to have some peace and quiet in their lives. This will cause the rejected women to be filled with rage, which they will vent upon the hapless betas, deltas, gammas, omegas, zetas and other letters of the greek alphabet.

Better to leave things where they are, with most lesser women daydreaming about someday being asked out by Chad and Tyrone while ignoring ordinary men. Ignoring ordinary men is much better than trying to destroy such men because of being rejected by Chad and Tyrone.

Yes, or better yet cutting females off from welfare or welfare jobs and police protection, so then they will have to rely on individual men. That would cause them to radically re-evaluate their situation.

[Mercury]

Women can ask men out, and they often will. They just need to have the man initiate the conversation first.

Nope. The women now need to initiate the conversation first.