Why do UNAmericanized women have such different faces?

[Winston]

Have you noticed that women who are UNAmericanized or don't speak English as their primary language, have very different faces from American or Americanized women? Why is that? Is it because a woman in America cannot continue to be feminine, sweet, modest, sincere and innocent? Do they have to become spoiled, nasty, mean, unfriendly, narcissistic in order to survive in America? If so, why?

Here is an example of an UNAmericanized woman's face. Notice that it looks tender, sweet, sincere, feminine, wholesome, and genuinely nice. Why don't Americanized have this kind of look?

http://dating.happierabroad.com/gal/det ... 821214?b=1

[Falcon]

Compare the two photos below. One features Hmong-American women of California, and the other features Hmong women in northern Vietnam. The contrast is quite striking, don't you think?

[Repatriate]

Falcon, they may not even be from the same ethnic grouping though. The hmong-american women might have intermingled chinese bloodlines.

Btw the middle girl in that hmong-american pic is just one hairstyle away from wearing the colored tribal dress.

[Falcon]

Falcon, they may not even be from the same ethnic grouping though. The hmong-American women might have intermingled chinese bloodlines.

Btw the middle girl in that hmong-American pic is just one hairstyle away from wearing the colored tribal dress.

Repatriate, I know a lot about this. The Hmong of northwestern Vietnam and northern Laos can understand each others' languages. Don't look at just superficials like that, since makeup and photo brushups really change the way people look.

Southern Chinese are generally more similar to the Hmong than they are to Northern Chinese, so what you just wrote doesn't make much sense (It's Sinocentric thinking). In rural SW China, which I've spent a few months traveling in, they're indistinguishable from the local Han Chinese when they're not wearing ethnic clothing.

The real point here is the spoiled Asian-American look vs. how they look "in the wild", as you might put it.

[Repatriate]

Southern Chinese are generally more similar to the Hmong than they are to Northern Chinese, so what you just wrote doesn't make much sense (It's Sinocentric thinking). In rural SW China, which I've spent a few months traveling in, they're indistinguishable from the local Han Chinese when they're not wearing ethnic clothing.

Which southern Chinese are you talking about? Where is the boundary/demarcation of when people start to look similar or different from these Hmong. Just saying "southern Chinese" is too general. I know you know a lot about this stuff but please specify.

The real point here is the spoiled Asian-American look vs. how they look "in the wild", as you might put it.

This is where you and I differ greatly in mentality. Just because a girl has some make up on and looks fashionable doesn't make her "spoiled." It's how she is in actuality as a person and not how she is in appearance. Some girl living in a shack in the province could have the mentality to take you for all your worth as well once you get in a comfort zone with them. You just never know, man.

[Falcon]

Which southern Chinese are you talking about? Where is the boundary/demarcation of when people start to look similar or different from these Hmong. Just saying "southern Chinese" is too general. I know you know a lot about this stuff but please specify.

Go to the boondocks of Guizhou, Yunnan, Guangxi, or even Guangdong and Hunan, and you'll see plenty of rural Chinese who look very Southeast Asian and could easily pass for native Thais (not Thai-Chinese) from the provinces.

This is where you and I differ greatly in mentality. Just because a girl has some make up on and looks fashionable doesn't make her "spoiled." It's how she is in actuality as a person and not how she is in appearance. Some girl living in a shack in the province could have the mentality to take you for all your worth as well once you get in a comfort zone with them. You just never know, man.

I understand. But it's not about the makeup. Can't you see that fake, proud, vain American smile? Winston can easily detect that, but for some reason it's invisible to folks like AmericanInBangkok and others.

[Repatriate]

Go to the boondocks of Guizhou, Yunnan, Guangxi, or even Guangdong and Hunan, and you'll see plenty of rural Chinese who look very Southeast Asian and could easily pass for native Thais (not Thai-Chinese) from the provinces.

I don't doubt that but are you sure these people don't identify with some other sub ethnic grouping but publicly identify as han to avoid stigma?

I understand. But it's not about the makeup. Can't you see that fake, proud, vain American smile? Winston can easily detect that, but for some reason it's invisible to folks like AmericanInBangkok and others.

I don't want to put it this way because it sounds condescending..but you are young man and it's obvious you don't have a lot of experience with a broad demographic of women especially on an intimate level. I have dated quite a few of these girls that you would immediately write off as "spoiled" or say they give off a "vain" appearance but once you get to know them they are still all different on an individual level.

My last g/f who was Thai would drive me around town, buy me shirts, and treat me whenever she could. She liked fancy handbags and the whole nine yards but she enjoyed fashion and accessories. She saved money from her job to buy all that stuff and never asked for a single thing.

She was never snobby about what she liked either. She just like some nice things and liked to look good too. Nothing wrong with that.

[buddy77]

..have a scowl on their faces unless they are sales people and you are their Customer.

In public places they have this "dont talk to me" vibe and the lousy personality to match!

[Falcon]

I don't want to put it this way because it sounds condescending..but you are young man and it's obvious you don't have a lot of experience with a broad demographic of women especially on an intimate level. I have dated quite a few of these girls that you would immediately write off as "spoiled" or say they give off a "vain" appearance but once you get to know them they are still all different on an individual level.

My last g/f who was Thai would drive me around town, buy me shirts, and treat me whenever she could. She liked fancy handbags and the whole nine yards but she enjoyed fashion and accessories. She saved money from her job to buy all that stuff and never asked for a single thing.

She was never snobby about what she liked either. She just like some nice things and liked to look good too. Nothing wrong with that.

Thanks for the anecdotes and encouragements. So now let's get down to the practicals. The question I now have is, how do I get there? How do I initiate dating with those types that you keep talking about?

You did say that you have dated Asian Americans before, and that those dates were pretty average. Then you said that once you went to Thailand, there was a totally different scene too.

How would you personally initiate relationships with:
(1) Middle-class Asian-American women in California
(2) Middle-class Thai-Chinese women in Bangkok

Basically use the cliche "Can I go out to have coffee with you?", then keep having coffee several more times until she says she wants to be your girlfriend? I seriously still don't get how middle-class urban US dating works. I'm only used to very direct flirting resulting in immediate attraction, which is a lower-class SE Asian / Latin American thing. But this would feel highly inappropriate with upper-middle-class Asian women.

I was never able to get anywhere with #1, and never bothered with #2.

[Repatriate]

Thanks for the anecdotes and encouragements. So now let's get down to the practicals. The question I now have is, how do I get there? How do I initiate dating with those types that you keep talking about?

I'm no life coach nor am I some kind of PUA dude so i'll just offer my simple advice from experience.

Let me tell you what you have going for you:

You seem to be an extrovert. At least you exhibit extrovert tendencies from what I can tell from your posts and you genuinely enjoy chatting and getting to know people. This is the opposite of how I am. I don't like talking with a lot of people. I usually don't care for big social gatherings. I'm generally pretty selective in who I interact with. A lot of personalities I meet just plain annoy me. Talking with most people in real life feels like a task to me and leaves me feeling drained. I used to drink quite a bit during socializing to over come this phobia. Now, I don't drink at all and just deal with it.

I am not an extreme introvert but i'm introverted enough to where I think this has actually led me to miss quite a few opportunities in dating and social relationships. Being an extrovert is still MUCH better for dating so you already have an innate positive trait which will work to your advantage.

How would you personally initiate relationships with:
(1) Middle-class Asian-American women in California
(2) Middle-class Thai-Chinese women in Bangkok

Basically use the cliche "Can I go out to have coffee with you?", then keep having coffee several more times until she says she wants to be your girlfriend? I seriously still don't get how middle-class urban US dating works. I'm only used to very direct flirting resulting in immediate attraction, which is a lower-class SE Asian / Latin American thing. But this would feel highly inappropriate with upper-middle-class Asian women.

I was never able to get anywhere with #1, and never bothered with #2.

I know some of you guys don't believe in "game" but the basic concepts are legit for interacting with women.

The easiest and most "non game" way is to get to know some people in a social circle with nice looking women, talk to girls in it because then you're not a stranger, build some genuine rapport with the girl with interesting and playful conversation. Ask for her number. Send her a txt later that day arranging a future date. If there is attraction there go for the cliche coffee or whatever date. Converse. Hold eye contact. Touch periodically when appropriate to build physical attraction. Then escalate from there. That's what I did with my ex girlfriend. How hard is that really...?

1st date subtle back/arm touching and hand holding.

2nd date we made out and were already planning a trip together. Could have taken her to my condo after that date but opted to wait.

3rd date we went to Koh Samet, rode atvs, and had sex in a beautiful location.

...from then on we met many more times and it just became a bf/gf relationship. If you do it right she'll be the one asking if this means you're both together now.

I'm getting the impression you aren't a very sexual guy around women or maybe you're too innocent boyish. From what you've said about your experiences on this forum your type of flirting probably comes across as innocent harmless playing to a lot of women.

Another problem i'm seeing is that you associate people in the "lower class" or impoverished cultures with openness and friendliness. Have you considered that the only reason why they are that friendly with you is because of ingrained classism? You are an obvious higher class individual playing with them which makes them giggle and laugh at the attention because it's so unusual. This is all superficial playing.

It seems you are intimidated by decent looking middle class women because you feel they are "higher" than you psychologically. Maybe you feel you aren't worthwhile which is some deep seeded insecurities you need to get over. Maybe this has been hammered in with constant rejection in the U.S. I don't know what the root psychological cause is but like I said..it's something you need to get over. You are putting these women on a pedestal and lowering your own perceived value as a person.

The fact is reasonably decent looking women usually have lots of guys hitting on them all the time in subtle ways or outright wanting to have sex all the time. Some of their personalities become more aloof/guarded with initial contact. This doesn't mean they are naturally this way. Once you get through to them then the true personality comes out..whether that be good or bad. You are misreading this initial aloofness from these women as them all being "bitchy" when this just isn't true.

U.S. women are particularly bent because of deep cultural/social issues too and it's more of an extreme.

[Maverick]

I understand. But it's not about the makeup. Can't you see that fake, proud, vain American smile? Winston can easily detect that, but for some reason it's invisible to folks like AmericanInBangkok and others.

Yeah, I can't see it either.

To me, the American girls look happy. But even if it is a "fake smile", they're posing for a picture. So they're not going to be smiling as if someone just told them a joke. In other words, it might look more fake because of the situation.

The foreign girls look pissed off, in my opinion.

[Tezcatlipoca]

I think this is about make-up vs no make-up

[The_Adventurer]

The Miao and Dong people of southern China share ancestry with the vietnamese. No they don't pretend to be han to avoid stigma. Being a minority has advantages including being able to have more than one child.

[jamesbond]

..have a scowl on their faces unless they are sales people and you are their Customer.

In public places they have this "dont talk to me" vibe and the lousy personality to match!

Yes, a lot of guys have noticed this "scowl" look on American women's faces. God forbid they actually make eye contact and smile at men (like foreign women do).

American women have this "bitch goddess" look on their face.

[Tezcatlipoca]

Isn't it more the corporate cunt that looks like that? I get the vibe that they're more on the east coast or in fields like IT/Finance/etc. Have you noticed different attitudes by profession? I have. Women in real estate seem often to be attractive, fairly well to do, and at least superficially charming.