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Mad Mouse Mercer Makes Marmalade Muffins

Mad Mousy Muppet Mercer Makes Marmalade Muffins

A man that's a maverick or muppet?
Or a foolish boy with a sockpuppet?
Much like Fauci's Ferret, a dirty mouse
Some say he got herpes in a whorehouse
He's a guy who makes a new marmalade
But it's more the color of green-olive jade
It was all rotten and covered in mold
But Mercer wanted to be really bold
He made muffins, swapped sugar for salt
I imagine it would taste as bad as asphalt
Instead of getting buff like Chad in a gym
He decided to make a muffin to get slim
Mercer's Marmalade Muffins makes one sick
But I imagine that's why he's a terrible Maverick
He goes his own contemptible little way
Is it possible he's actually a closeted gay?
He doesn't want to try to become his very best
Some people want him to give complaining a rest
He doesn't care about friends, only making foes
Don't have sympathy for this bloke's woes
Should we add rat poison or cyanide to the mix?
I think we can call the name brand Mad Mew Six!