The New Year is coming around again. I'll make some predictions for 2016:
-Winston and Adama will get married and make flat babies.
Surprisingly, said babies will arrive not carried by a stork but by turtles.
-The trolls will overthrow Winston and establish their Troll Empire.
The site will be renamed "Trolling Abroad"
-S-parc will get caught cheating by Mel, when she finds him having an orgy with blow up dolls she's never seen before.
Eventually all three will be merged into a single cybernetic entity called " S_Mel"
-Tsar will return to the forum, and claim that he has made a lot of progress: he worked at his new job for an entire day.
He also finishes the first three lessons of the Pimsleur Russian series as pressured by S_Mel
-Ghost will write a new book that no one cares about.
Ghost hires Johnny1975 as advertiser, soon the whole internet is spammed with "Read my M%#$@& Book now!"
-Drealm will go to Mexico again and once more pronounce his complete failure with desirable women there after approaching 1 woman.
Tries a different mall this time
-Adama will receive a doctorate in astrophysics for his incredible work on the flat earth theory
He will get an additional Phd for pulling new laws of physics out of his rear end, on-the-fly. World scientists are astonished.
-BlackKnight/Paggy will receive an honorary medical degree after his work diagnosing people with "asperger's" on the internet.
Additional honoris-causa for revealing new work in the treatment of Mythomania and Attention-whoring disorders
-Jester will return and take things to the next level...by +2ing every post.
+1
-Winston will meet a man named Murphy and develop a new conspiracy theory stating that this man is the physical manifestation of Murphy's Law.
To Winston's astonishment the man takes him on his flying saucer and proves to him the earth is round. After claiming it was all staged or bogus, he enters such cognitive dissonance that he ends up divorcing Adama, who then goes to marry said Murphy.
-Fschmidt will be revealed to be the leader of the Global Jewish Conspiracy
Says "So what?"
-Cornfed will get married to the troll Blue Murder and make Blue Corn Babies.
The best man at the wedding will be cornfed's personal heckler Contrarian Expatriate
-Taco will finally give up trying to predict the end of the world...only for the world to actually end in 2016.
Devil dog steps in and tells him "I told you"
-In a desperate attempt to save the forum after the Troll Empire is established, Winston will inject Droid with Skynet, and Droid will become a Terminator. He will be sent back in time to retroactively terminate the trolls. His exploits will made into a great film with one great sequel to follow, but then Hollywood will latch onto it like a parasite and make several shitty films about it.
But before all that, droid will be "killin' it" in Asia
(i just couldn't help it)
