Happier Abroad Forum Community

Yo what's up everyone.

Bars and pubs often get bashed as being overrated for meeting people. The truth is bars and pubs, not nightclubs are the 'go-to' venues fro meeting new people and bumping into people you know as nodding acquaintances.

Here goes reasons why;

• Bars are good places to organise gatherings; you and a friend meet, others can join in their own time (as an alternative to a party at a house) friends through friends

• Bars are good places to meet friends of friends; friends you're with can bump into people they know who you could get talking to

• You can bump into people/nodding acquaintances met in other avenues (e.g. on courses, at dance classes, at meetup events, at walking groups, cycling groups, tennis club (insert) & get to know them further

• being a regular somewhere; knowing the regular customers and staff by face

So that's it. In my experience, that's how people can get to meet new people. We can see that the previous three points rely on knowing (millions) of people (maybe not?).

The regulars part. You turn-up to things regularly, events that is, people will get to know you, you'll get to know them, you'll start conversations. Here's the thing, you can go to a traditional pub on your own, get to know people over time by face as a nodding acquaintance. People who're new to an area normally go to the pub. You don't need to know loads of people to go out.

Pubs and bars vary enormously in how welcoming they are to new people, the staff and regulars alike. It's a matter of finding those friendly ones.

The traditional British pub is all about being a regular but also has the above-listed social benefits in meeting new people. The pub is a place you can 'drop in' and see familiar faces; be it regulars and staff. It's about being outside the household.

Now 'bars' and 'nightclubs' lack that 'regulars' aspect don't they? But not entirely. I think what I say applies to them as well.

These reasons are not specific to bars. The same could be said for restaurants, coffee shops, ice cream parlors, or anywhere people go to socialize with their friends.

It might be years before bars open up completely. Dating apps are more popular now during this pandemic than they ever were before. Although, dating apps for men are a complete waste of time, dating apps only favor women.

@ flowerthie

These reasons are not specific to bars. The same could be said for restaurants, coffee shops, ice cream parlors, or anywhere people go to socialize with their friends.

absolutely, thinking on the same lines I am.

Bars and the venues you list also are a good way to have a social life outside the household, there's a lack of those lower-stress venues that have the dynamics mentioned. The reason we have such a severe loneliness epidemic in the western countries is because of what I call 'forced isolation'; nowhere you're a regular at without the stressors of bars.

There is a severe lack of informal social venues where you can go to if you simply don't want to be at home, even if you're not looking to meet new people. This is one thing that needs to be addressed in western society and speaks volumes about the loneliness epidemic.