Happier Abroad Forum Community

Something that i've noticed right off the bat is that a lot of American guys who haven't been abroad tend to dicker and argue over trivial minutiae a lot. It's like guys always insist they have to get one over you and tend to have this very nasty passive-aggressive attitude.

I'm not talking about the internet since a forum is where people are supposed to argue and debate but it's more apparent in real life. I've noticed a lot of American guys will test boundaries especially when they first meet you. Like they're trying to find something to hang on you or one up you later. It's probably one of the most annoying cultural traits that I could never really put my finger on until I lived abroad for awhile.

I've noticed similar things with guys from the U.K. too but I haven't been around those people nearly enough to draw a similar conclusion. Maybe it's just an anglo thing?

Repatriate wrote:Something that i've noticed right off the bat is that a lot of American guys who haven't been abroad tend to dicker and argue over trivial minutiae a lot. It's like guys always insist they have to get one over you and tend to have this very nasty passive-aggressive attitude.

Obviously you have never argued online with Russians or Chinese (usually guys hired by the crew in Jinan) over any western policy or USA policy.

Besides being pedants, they also are blind to western-style logic and reasoning, values and just omit, gloss over, ignore or brush aside any criticism of their own cultures.

It is a stunning experience to have someone say:

"Yes, but Stalin/Mao were just trying to help their people..."

when you bring up the tens of millions killed.

Thing is if you accept and concede that the USA has been a Bad Actor over the past 60 years with about 10+ million killed in over 25 bombings or invasions of other nations, they still don't concede that what Mao/Stalin did was even on an equally morally bad footing.

Truly mentally and logically challenged, which in the case of Russians requires that they lie to themselves because we all know that Russians tend to be well educated and intellectual. So they must lie to themselves to rationalise Stalin/Mao, etc.

Perhaps there is something to what you say. Almost all the English-speaking peoples have been brought up in a culture that practices the common law. In most of the rest of Europe their legal culture is comprised of the civil law. The Chinese practiced Confucian methodologies which is also quite different than the Common Law.

There are huge differences between these legal cultures and, I suspect, the legal culture will affect the way people interact at least when they engage each other in civic discourse.

The Common Law presumes two sides to every issue and that the truth will reside after empirical evidence is produced by the opposing sides through a neutral process refereed by a neutral facilitator (judges) and decided on by the claimant's (or defendant's) peers. Thus, the burden of finding the truth (or presenting the evidence most favorable) is on your shoulders.

In civil law, the judge is the principle fact finder. So, the civil law is more hierarchical and less dependent on the individual claimant uncovering facts for himself.

Holy shit, was that pedantic?!

Jason, no you seem to be knowing what your talking about

I think this is even worse with german people. In the Anglo world there is at least something like wit and espirit but the german are really pedantic robots.

And to think I learned comparative law in Europe while studying with a bunch of Germans!

Repatriate wrote:Something that i've noticed right off the bat is that a lot of American guys who haven't been abroad tend to dicker and argue over trivial minutiae a lot. It's like guys always insist they have to get one over you and tend to have this very nasty passive-aggressive attitude.

I'm not talking about the internet since a forum is where people are supposed to argue and debate but it's more apparent in real life. I've noticed a lot of American guys will test boundaries especially when they first meet you. Like they're trying to find something to hang on you or one up you later. It's probably one of the most annoying cultural traits that I could never really put my finger on until I lived abroad for awhile.

I've noticed similar things with guys from the U.K. too but I haven't been around those people nearly enough to draw a similar conclusion. Maybe it's just an anglo thing?

I hope it's just an anglo thing. But I fear though it's more of a general spoiled young snot thing. A lot of white Americans are really touchy and immature in real life and online, and you have to be careful to talk to them like they're five-year-olds - or they'll cry or "be all upset". Young educated upper-class Mexicans and of course Argentineans can be even worse online and almost as bad in person. If you kiss their spoiled asses enough, they let their defenses down and you can be friends.

This is one of those things I wanna be wrong on, so feel free to prove me wrong via counterexample. Where are you living (or where have you lived) overseas where the guys are NOT so defensive, touchy, egotistical and defensive?