Happier Abroad Forum Community

Has anyone here had legit experience dating Vietnamese women? If so, please let me know your experience (good, bad, everything, etc...). I've been living in Vietnam since late 2019 and at this point 2 years later I'm ready to get the hell out of here. I've had a lot of fun here (touring the country, islands, beaches, mountains), but it's time for another country now. In my opinion, the pros of VN women is that they're very hot and seem to be pretty loyal if they decide on you. The cons are : simple minded, narrow outlook on life, to be honest they're personalities are not that fun to be around (compared to Thai women). One of the best cities in Vietnam if you're a foreigner is Saigon. It's a liberal, progressive city and many women there speak English and are open to foreigners. Overall, I love Vietnam for the weather and natural landscape of the country, but I'll marry a Thai girl eventually hahahahaha.

kangarunner wrote: ↑

September 16th, 2021, 2:27 am

Has anyone here had legit experience dating Vietnamese women? If so, please let me know your experience (good, bad, everything, etc...). I've been living in Vietnam since late 2019 and at this point 2 years later I'm ready to get the hell out of here. I've had a lot of fun here (touring the country, islands, beaches, mountains), but it's time for another country now. In my opinion, the pros of VN women is that they're very hot and seem to be pretty loyal if they decide on you. The cons are : simple minded, narrow outlook on life, to be honest they're personalities are not that fun to be around (compared to Thai women). One of the best cities in Vietnam if you're a foreigner is Saigon. It's a liberal, progressive city and many women there speak English and are open to foreigners. Overall, I love Vietnam for the weather and natural landscape of the country, but I'll marry a Thai girl eventually hahahahaha.

Is Vietnam a 'loose' culture or a 'tight' culture? I don't remember the name of the cross-cultural researcher who came up with this, but a 'tight' culture is where everyone is expected to be the same, tightly distributed around the center point of a bell curve. A 'loose' culture would have a flatter, shorter bell curve. That is, on whatever issue you are talking about, more deviation from the norm is allowed.

When I heard that, I thought about South Korea (in the 1990's at least) being tight. To me, it seemed so uniform and homogenous. Everyone is supposed to think the same way. An older white man who'd been there a long time that I struck a conversation up with said everyone in the culture was supposed to be the same. His daughter would ask for a chicken sandwich with no mayonnaise at Hardee's. They'd put just a little on it. When she went back to ask why, the person said, "Everyone wants a little mayonnaise on their sandwich." It's like everyone had to be the same. An American friend of mine had a Korean wife who did not like garlic. She must have had a really, really tough time of it over there.

Then I moved to Indonesia. Their culture, or cultures, are collectivist, like South Korea, but I found it to be a 'loose' culture where I was living in Jakarta. There are so many different people-groups and languages, they are pretty chill about someone talking differently, thinking differently, etc. They all interact with different cultures and not everyone thinks exactly the same way. The Dutch lived there for centuries until independence in the 1950's, so they are used to westerners to some extent, too, though you get some attention for it, especially if you go the boonies where no one has ever seen a white person. I've never experienced it, but I've heard of everyone wanting to touch the white dude like on that Indiana Jones movie set in India.

I think it's definitely a tight culture given the political nature of the country. Vietnamese people are very friendly (at least on the surface level). Like I said, from what I've observed they have a very narrow outlook on life in general.

MrMan wrote: ↑

September 16th, 2021, 7:48 am

kangarunner wrote: ↑

September 16th, 2021, 2:27 am

Has anyone here had legit experience dating Vietnamese women? If so, please let me know your experience (good, bad, everything, etc...). I've been living in Vietnam since late 2019 and at this point 2 years later I'm ready to get the hell out of here. I've had a lot of fun here (touring the country, islands, beaches, mountains), but it's time for another country now. In my opinion, the pros of VN women is that they're very hot and seem to be pretty loyal if they decide on you. The cons are : simple minded, narrow outlook on life, to be honest they're personalities are not that fun to be around (compared to Thai women). One of the best cities in Vietnam if you're a foreigner is Saigon. It's a liberal, progressive city and many women there speak English and are open to foreigners. Overall, I love Vietnam for the weather and natural landscape of the country, but I'll marry a Thai girl eventually hahahahaha.

Is Vietnam a 'loose' culture or a 'tight' culture? I don't remember the name of the cross-cultural researcher who came up with this, but a 'tight' culture is where everyone is expected to be the same, tightly distributed around the center point of a bell curve. A 'loose' culture would have a flatter, shorter bell curve. That is, on whatever issue you are talking about, more deviation from the norm is allowed.

When I heard that, I thought about South Korea (in the 1990's at least) being tight. To me, it seemed so uniform and homogenous. Everyone is supposed to think the same way. An older white man who'd been there a long time that I struck a conversation up with said everyone in the culture was supposed to be the same. His daughter would ask for a chicken sandwich with no mayonnaise at Hardee's. They'd put just a little on it. When she went back to ask why, the person said,["Everyone wants a little mayonnaise on their sandwich." It's like everyone had to be the same. An American friend of mine had a Korean wife who did not like garlic. She must have had a really, really tough time of it over there.

Then I moved to Indonesia. Their culture, or cultures, are collectivist, like South Korea, but I found it to be a 'loose' culture where I was living in Jakarta. There are so many different people-groups and languages, they are pretty chill about someone talking differently, thinking differently, etc. They all interact with different cultures and not everyone thinks exactly the same way. The Dutch lived there for centuries until independence in the 1950's, so they are used to westerners to some extent, too, though you get some attention for it, especially if you go the boonies where no one has ever seen a white person. I've never experienced it, but I've heard of everyone wanting to touch the white dude like on that Indiana Jones movie set in India.

Vietnam is definitely a tight culture.

Tight in what sense Adam? Can you be more specific? You mean uptight?

“Tight cultures,” she observes, “have strong social norms and little tolerance for deviance, while loose cultures have weak social norms and are highly permissive.” Think of the difference between a gathering for buttoned-up middle-aged churchgoers and a party for 20-somethings in Bushwick, Brooklyn.

https://www.nytimes.com/2018/09/14/book ... akers.html

Trading a cute Viet trad wife for a "fun" Thai faen is a really bad idea man. From someone who has been there, done that, and cares.

jerryrigged wrote: ↑

September 27th, 2021, 2:37 pm

Trading a cute Viet trad wife for a "fun" Thai faen is a really bad idea man. From someone who has been there, done that, and cares.

Can we hear your story?

kangarunner wrote: ↑

September 27th, 2021, 7:51 pm

jerryrigged wrote: ↑

September 27th, 2021, 2:37 pm

Trading a cute Viet trad wife for a "fun" Thai faen is a really bad idea man. From someone who has been there, done that, and cares.

Can we hear your story?

Years after I'd been conned out of a green card by a Chinese girl I started vacationing in Thailand... I started really loving it. I started staying longer each time. The women were great (to look at) but to be honest with you the biggest thing for me was the ability to live in a pretty nice hotel like its just a normal residence. And the price for food. Anyway the exchange rate, more or less. Women were an added bonus. I wasnt really looking for someone when I met a factory worker who worked at a factory in Chon Buri. Legit she had the uniforms and everything. So we started dating for awhile. Figuring it was more or less safe, since he had a job, right? Wrong. I found out she was in the game in Pattaya as a second job alongside her factory work after we got married. Then I found the extra mobile phones. I found out about the properties she owned with many other random, strange people around Thailand. I was warned that she was a scammer by random people on facebook. I never noticed that she had Praiya f***ing Suriya in her likes. Knowing I couild never win in a Thai court against her, I left her alone, without notice, with nothing. Just cold. Just booked a flight to Dubai. See ya later! I got a divorce back home. I never spoke to her again after leaving her that morning. She never responded to the summons. Tricky to do, but I was able to. I've always had good lawyers. Anyway, I only lost about 10K in the whole mess. Lots of guys lose their entire fortunes. Lots of girls with good English ability are former bar girls or part time prostitutes. Or just online scammers with lots of farang boyfriends. The extra phones my "wife" had were likely being used to get money out of other foreigners. You'd think they'd give this up when they marry, but no. I can count on one hand the amount of truly happy Farang-Thai relationships I am aware of. Those women are just best left avoided, or if you must get involved, just don't marry them at the amphur's office. Then the marriage means nothing and you can exit at your leisure.

Forget the women. Vietnam is no place to be right now. I got out a few months ago and VERY glad that I did. The reports I'm hearing from friends back there paint a picture of eternal lockdowns, govt corruption, economic disaster, folks running out of food. Even people who were defending the govt before are upset now.

I'm grateful to be back in the US. Which is really sad, because the US (much of it) has now become a friggin' medical apartheid. It's just that, as bad as the US govt has gotten--and it has gotten quite bad--they're like boy scouts compared to SEA govts.

Anyway, Vietnamese women I'd say are average or a little better than average in pretty much every category. I had some disappointments but I also had some really good times.

flowerthief00 wrote: ↑

September 27th, 2021, 10:47 pm

Forget the women. Vietnam is no place to be right now. I got out a few months ago and VERY glad that I did. The reports I'm hearing from friends back there paint a picture of eternal lockdowns, govt corruption, economic disaster, folks running out of food. Even people who were defending the govt before are upset now.

I'm still here in Nha Trang and everything is opened back up. Sure, large supermarkets and very few restaurants require the QR code for vax but other than that, everything is back to normal.

Thai women maybe fun . They are also Whores only worth a Pump and Dump. They are the most unfaithful women in the world.
NEWSFLASH: if you are with a Thai Lady all the money you give her is going to her boyfriend.

@kangarunner

@tommytan_li21 told me he didn't find Vietnamese girls to be approachable or friendly. Why? Didn't you say they were open and friendly to talking to strangers and meeting new people? Plus Tommy is a decent looking young guy. How can that be? Did you try to help him meet girls when you met up with him?

Can you use cold approach in Vietnam or only dating sites?

@kangarunner

This expat channel says that Vietnamese girls aren't interested in foreigners unless they are older and rebels, and that they work all the time and are workaholics and not into having fun, and that their parents don't want them to marry foreigners. Is this true?



This other expat channel says the same thing. He also says that Vietnamese girls aren't approachable. Is that true?