What are (or were) your greatest barriers to meeting new people?
Posted: December 30th, 2019, 1:50 pm
Whether you're unhappy at home and at a dead end regarding meeting new people or happier abroad and have a satisfying social and/or dating life, what is (if unhappy at home) or was (if you were formerly unhappy at home) you biggest barriers to meeting new people?
In summary
Not getting to meet people through your social circle
This could be due to either a) not having a social circle (e.g., people getting busy or moving away) and b) your friends being a dead-end; not having a wider circle of acquaintances themselves you could meet, they're all boring home-buddies.
Your work circumstances being a bust
You work at the kind of job that's only got a handful of employees, that's long hours, where everyone goes their own separate ways and commutes are long. There's little time or energy left to devote to extra-curricular ways to meet people like clubs, meets and classes.
I have no-one to go with to try new things alone
You know you want to try out various events and meets but have no-one to go with. Either people you know are too busy, not reliable or simply aren't interested in tagging along. Even so if you have to go alone, maybe there's a lack of things you can go to alone without having to be with friends.
Meeting people is restricted to horrible noisy bars & clubs
Perhaps you do have a people to hang out with but they only hang out in settings you cannot stand that are dreadful for meeting people, for starting conversation, lack of ice-breakers, people being ridiculously drunk. Perhaps you're faced with the choice of a) either meet-up in these settings or b) do other things alone.
There's not much in my community in terms of events, clubs, classes etc. where I could meet people my age
This is especially so in small towns and partly ties in with the point of going to things alone. We've all heard that if you want to meet new people, join clubs, classes and meets. One barrier people can run into is there's a) little going on and b) everything either seems to cater for older people or couples and families.
More detail on some of the common practical barriers to meeting new people can be found here;
https://neverinsilence.wordpress.com/2018/06/07/1942/
Which ones have applied to you?
If any of the things addressed in my article have resonated with you, how has moving to a new city or new locale helped?
In summary
Not getting to meet people through your social circle
This could be due to either a) not having a social circle (e.g., people getting busy or moving away) and b) your friends being a dead-end; not having a wider circle of acquaintances themselves you could meet, they're all boring home-buddies.
Your work circumstances being a bust
You work at the kind of job that's only got a handful of employees, that's long hours, where everyone goes their own separate ways and commutes are long. There's little time or energy left to devote to extra-curricular ways to meet people like clubs, meets and classes.
I have no-one to go with to try new things alone
You know you want to try out various events and meets but have no-one to go with. Either people you know are too busy, not reliable or simply aren't interested in tagging along. Even so if you have to go alone, maybe there's a lack of things you can go to alone without having to be with friends.
Meeting people is restricted to horrible noisy bars & clubs
Perhaps you do have a people to hang out with but they only hang out in settings you cannot stand that are dreadful for meeting people, for starting conversation, lack of ice-breakers, people being ridiculously drunk. Perhaps you're faced with the choice of a) either meet-up in these settings or b) do other things alone.
There's not much in my community in terms of events, clubs, classes etc. where I could meet people my age
This is especially so in small towns and partly ties in with the point of going to things alone. We've all heard that if you want to meet new people, join clubs, classes and meets. One barrier people can run into is there's a) little going on and b) everything either seems to cater for older people or couples and families.
More detail on some of the common practical barriers to meeting new people can be found here;
https://neverinsilence.wordpress.com/2018/06/07/1942/
Which ones have applied to you?
If any of the things addressed in my article have resonated with you, how has moving to a new city or new locale helped?
People today don't have social skills and don't know what to talk about.