Good Wife's Guide

[Evergreen]

Anyone saw that already? Here's one in PDF format http://ggjake.files.wordpress.com/2008/ ... -guide.pdf

I would suggest Winston to print it out and put it on the back fridge of the kitchen to let Diane see it but she is not his wife for now.

Anyways, what you all think of the Good Wife's Guide?

[Shokkers]

This should be required reading...for guys and girls. Marriage wouldn't look like some gleaming prize.

[Winston]

I wish, but Dianne doesn't seem to care about such things. Only cash and generosity matter to her, not any ethics or ideals. I'm trying to change this, but she resists change and uses shaming tactics when I don't comply with her.

According to her, the ideal man she wants is someone who is totally loyal and never looks at other girls, and is unconditionally generous from the heart and giving without expecting anything or making any conditions. And she shames me for not being this way. WTF.

I hate it when someone is wrong but acts like they are in the right.

[Winston]

Shit if I didn't know you were in the philipines with a filipina gf, I'd have thought you were another miserable husband back in America stuck with an AW wife!

yeah it's tough, especially since you're stuck with a kid. And on top of that you didnt assert your masculine authority and discipline her early on. But all that's water under the bridge. That's the choice you made and now you have to live with it.

I still think your best option is to keep paying your gf and her family with CS payments. Plus let her raise the kid while you get to see him on weekends or something. I mean, being in your situation kinda defeats the whole purpose of leaving America and finding foreign women abroad.

W: Then how did you know I had a kid. Yeah it sucks not having freedom when there's scores of everlasting hot girls I could be with, everywhere around me. But it has its perks. At least I always have someone who I know cares about me.

Not everyone comes here to be a playboy.

I just hate how girls here get so possessive and villainize men who have normal desires for more than one girl.

I still wouldn't trade what I have now for the life I had back in the US though. At least my self esteem feels good everyday knowing that I am desirable here and that I have "status" around here. It seems true what someone said in another thread, Kristine I think, that a man's status matters more than his looks. (which is why fat old guys with nasty personalities can get girls here too)

What are CS payments?

I tried to live without her, but eventually got so sad that I began crying for no reason, which was odd cause I thought I was happy being free. It was illogical. But I am human.

[Winston]

I think I said that during a fit of anger. She has a good heart, but is a handful to deal with personality-wise. It's hard to explain. She is also possessive and controlling. If she weren't hot, I wouldn't put up with it.

Like everything, a relationship has its good and bad points. Nothing is 100 percent good.

Of course you aren't supposed to express your desires for other women, but it's hard in the fact that you HAVE the desires constantly. It's like you have to suppress them, but you don't want to.

I'm not even allowed to go out alone anymore, cause if I do, I can't resist the temptation to chat up and flirt with girls and get their number, etc. So Dianne implements a lot of tight controls to guard against that, which I won't even get into.

[Winston]

That's the reason for my advice (CS payments).

Sure, nothing is 100% good in a relationship but IMO it isn't even remotely desirable for a man looking to improve his romantic life abroad to have their every move controlled by an obsessively jealous woman. Or to be sexually frustrated in the easiest place in the world for a western man to get laid. He can save his money and have all that staying home in the US. But at least it sounds like you knew going in what to expect when you decided to go back to her. Being married is fine if that's what a guy wants, but I think the lesson for western single men overseas is that romance can be serious and life-changing when youre doing too much thinking with the little head and not the big one, especially when making a consequential decision like having a kid.

W: True. But what can I do? I can't live with her or without her. It's a dilemma that's not easily resolvable.

There's also a general dilemma here in that the females pressure you to stick to one (be monogamous and loyal) to them if they really like you, but you have too many choices that you don't want to stick to one. It's sort of a paradox. The dating and sex and babes are a paradise here, but each girl that likes you is trying to take away that freedom from you. Odd huh?!

Anyhow, you should have seen the street we were on earlier tonight, Fields Ave. Man on a Friday night, it was packed with TONS and TONS of sexy girls, so many of them looked like my perfect Asian dream girl, white skin, long legs, etc. (A lot like the hot light skinned asian girl in my new avatar to the left in fact ) Yum Yum. Ouch!!!!! I saw SO MANY today. More than ever! It looks like Angeles City is booming with more hotties than ever! I couldn't stop my mouth from gaping wide open a couple of times!

It was sooooooooooooooooo excruciating because since Dianne was with me, she kept getting mad and saying "Don't make me angry! I told you to stop looking at the girls! Just focus on me ok? You always do this!"

Man... Bro..... Words can describe how I feel now. Scores and scores of golden opportunities just flew by me and I was powerless to do anything about it. It's excruciating!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks for letting me vent.

[Winston]

No problem. No offense but the way you describe it, it doesn't sound like your situation is that much better than being in the States.

I guess having a kid does make it much more difficult to walk away from a girl who's making your life miserable.

Which is worse: the feeling of not being with your gf, or the feeling of perpetual sexual frustration such as the one you currently experience in Angeles City?

If its the former, then youll just have to suck it up and put up with the latter. Otherwise CS payments is pretty much the only way to go for you.

W: They both suck. One is not better than the other. They are different types of pain though.

My situation is better than in the states in that 1) at least I have someone attractive here, and 2) at least I am desirable here and given desirable status, whereas in the states, I am no one's type no matter how many girls I meet.

And I gotta tell you, when you are not desirable and no one's type, that's the worst.

BTW, speaking of the kid, I don't regret having a kid. As I've said before, look at it this way, would you want to be old and in your dying years and know that you never reproduced or have any offspring behind? That would be terribly sad don't you think?

That's why I'd rather have some children rather than none. And when you're in your mid 30's, it's pretty much the cut off point. It's now or never.

[Winston]

True swincor, but don't forget, once in a while, I do get to go out or escape, and get my "fix". And when I do, I make sure I have a "cloud 9" experience, if you know what I mean