Golddigger, or What?

[ExpeditionSailor]

Maybe this thread belongs in the Love and Dating forum, but here goes. While waiting for a private investigator to return a report on one of my Filipina chatmates, I thought I would post a profile on Date in Asia and see if I could pull any Thai women. Well, I've managed to meet one.

She claims she works as a pension and benefits administrator for a university in Thailand and is (or was, I can't tell, her English isn't very good) a Ministry of Education employee. While chatting with her on webcam a couple days ago, she showed me her government ID card, and it appears to show a picture of her dressed in a military-style uniform. Supposedly, a number of Thai government agencies issue uniforms. Searching around the web, I learned that Ministry of Interior staff sometimes wear uniforms similar to what my new chatmate was seen wearing in her ID card photo, but I haven't seen any evidence that Thai Ministry of Education staff are required to wear uniforms. She also says she is living in a university dorm that has been provided to her free of charge - she pays only for utilities. She shares the room with a young woman who she says is her granddaughter, but she herself has had no children and never been married, so I question how she could have a granddaughter.

She's 46. I'm 49, and a government worker as well. While chatting on webcam one evening, we somehow got around to the subject of retirement. She claims she can retire in five years with a full pension. I told her I might be able to retire at 55 with a reduced pension that might be sufficient to live on in Thailand, but not my home country of Canada. With this info, she seemed to perk up a bit. Then she started talking about a small plot of land she has in a rural location 30km away. She says her parents gave her the land, and she wants to build a house there, but she would rather build a house closer to the university where she works. She admitted that land closer to the university would mean a more expensive house.

She says she's poor, but makes 24,000 baht a month. I wouldn't consider that a poor salary in Thailand. Not great, but not poor.

Ever since we started chatting, she has expressed considerable eagerness for me to come visit her in Thailand. She wants to chat with me every day, too. She has also introduced me to an American man who is ex-military and retired and is one of her friends because he married one of her close friends in Thailand. The American and his Thai wife live in California. Supposedly they have a house in Thailand that they use as a vacation home and they visit Thailand periodically. I've chatted online with this guy, and he seems OK. Whether he really is ex-military remains to be seen. There are lots of pathological liars out there who claim that they too, have served in some country's military at one time or another.

I've got the feeling I've met a real gold-digger here. I also have the feeling that she plans to latch on to the first Westerner who will help her build that house that she wants so badly.

As an aside, this woman isn't particularly good-looking. She doesn't fit the stereotypical image of a Thai female scammer who is a bombshell in the looks department. Then again, an ugly guy like me has to take what he can get, if he can get anything at all. And looks are no indication of a woman's honesty or lack thereof.

Thoughts, anyone?

[tom]

ALL Women Are Shallow GFE Style Prostitute Leeches Of Varying Degrees

[xiongmao]

My uncle is over 60, his Thai gf is 35!

[davewe]

There's no way for us to tell whether she is a golddigger or not but there is nothing in your descrption that says that she is. She's middle aged, bordering on old and not good looking. Not great qualifications for a gold digger lifestyle, though you never know.

What would be wrong in meeting her? Same with your Filipina chatmate. IMO you have to meet before you can really determine how you both feel and whether you see any major red flags. The worst that can happen is you have fun, get introduced to a different culture and maybe get laid.

Of course everything changes if she asks you for money. But so far she hasn't - right?

You and I have spoken before and to be blunt my sense is you are so down on yourself that you don't believe women could want you, unless it's for money. That's a stumbling block you will have to overcome to obtain what I sense you really want.

OTOH, I will agree with the poster who says that all women at some level want support - financial and otherwise.

Good luck.