Filipinas and sarcasm

[Johnny1975]

I chat to loads of filipinas on dating sites. I think they're great, but sometimes I wish they could understand sarcasm more than they seem to. I feel like I have to dumb things down for them, and I don't mind doing that from time to time but I don't know if I could do it all the time. It would feel like there's a whole part of my personality that I wouldn't be able to express properly, which would irritate me. I'm willing to adapt a bit but I couldn't adapt too much.

For example, recently I was chatting with a girl and this is how the conversation went :




ME - Yes I like your country. A whole country made up of islands. What a great idea.

HER - u try to visit here

ME - Ok I'll be there in a minute. Just wait there. <----------OBVIOUSLY SARCASM

HER - in a minute? what do u mean?

ME - I'm joking.

HER -

ME - That face has no nose. <---------- IN REFERENCE TO THE SMILEY FACE

HER - coz the person that sends it doesnt have too <-- IT SEEMS LIKE SHE UNDERSTOOD, BUT I DON'T KNOW WHAT SHE'S ON ABOUT

ME - Oh my god, so that's a fake nose? Well I have a secret to tell you. You see my head, that's fake too.

HER - ahh.. u scared me

ME - Yeah I'm just a headless body. And my titi [DICK] is fake too. It's plastic, made in Taiwan. <---COME ON, THAT'S FUNNY

HER - ur not funny




I thought it was a pretty funny joke. But she didn't. Her attitude pis sed me off, considering that I was only trying to make her laugh. So I left the conversation for a week, and today I sent her this :

ME - Oh, really? Well, what can I say. I'm so sorry that my joke didn't impress your highness. Maybe I should chat with peasant girls instead of someone as amazing as you.



Obviously I'm being very sarcastic. I'm implying that she's uptight and can't take a little harmless joke. She hasn't responded. I don't know why and that doesn't bother me too much, but now I'm wondering if she even understands my tone. Does she get what I'm implying? Or does she actually think that I'm complimenting her by referring to her as amazing? I wouldn't be surprised if she's totally missed the point. I mean, if she thinks I can be there in 5 minutes, who knows what else she's capable of misunderstanding.

[davewe]

Besides the obvious differences in language and culture, sarcasm in general does not play well in PI. Of course there are exceptions, particularly if the girl is used to talking to foreigners. In this case it sounds like more than just she didn't get your joke - that she was offended somehow.

Just realize in dealing with most Pinays that they will take what you say as literal and since sarcasm is about implying the opposite of what you are literally saying, it doesn't work well.

YMMV.

[getmyazzouttahere]

Nope, it's you, friend. The rest of the world recognizes how dysfunctional and toxic that cynical American-style sarcasm is. It's hostility disguised badly as humor, and yet one more symptom of what's wrong with this place.

[zboy1]

Nope, it's you, friend. The rest of the world recognizes how dysfunctional and toxic that cynical American-style sarcasm is. It's hostility disguised badly as humor, and yet one more symptom of what's wrong with this place.

The Chinese don't get sarcasm as well...or at least the ones I'm around. Asians in general, aren't used to that kind of humor....

[gsjackson]

Yes, I would say that sarcasm, satire and other subtleties are very much a bridge too far with non-English speakers, especially Philipinas, from what I've heard of them. They are with most American women, who are nominally fluent in English.

I've generally found that words can only hurt with women, seldom help. Just get in her personal space, lock eyes, smile and shut up. If you have to talk, make sure it's in platitudes.

But as Davewe says, YMMV.

[RedMenace]

Lol dude you're bad at talking to women online that you have never met in person. You have to stop trying to be funny and impressing them. Fill their heads up with an image of you both together in the future and they will be impressed. I don't really try to be funny but now and then she finds what I say funny so you don't have to be sarcastic to be funny. Just show them how morally sound you are and ask them about their future plans. Then try to intercept that and combine it with yours. Then paint them the image of you both together. Trust me they like that. Women are imaginative creatures. Why do you think the prince charming fantasy exist even though such men don't exist. But women still believe they do. But yea you have to stop conversing with Asian women like you do AW because the culture is very different and required a different approach. The woman I speak to is a firm/upper middle class but I was able to share my vision of the future we would have together with her. I will need to reinforce that with action by travelling to China but she is already possessive of me. Anyways you have to change your mindset when dealing with women abroad. The culture is not the same brah.

[Johnny1975]

Nope, it's you, friend. The rest of the world recognizes how dysfunctional and toxic that cynical American-style sarcasm is. It's hostility disguised badly as humor, and yet one more symptom of what's wrong with this place.

Let's get something clear. Sarcasm comes in different forms. Anyone who doesn't know that doesn't understand sarcasm. I'm not talking about nasty sarcasm, bitchy sarcasm, aggressive sarcasm. I'm talking about playfulness. I'm talking about saying something in a joking way which can't possibly be true, or is too farfetched to be true, for example if she says have you ever been to the Philippines and I say no but I can be there in 5 minutes, just wait there.

You're talking about something that has nothing to do with what I'm talking about.

[Rock]

I chat to loads of filipinas on dating sites. I think they're great, but sometimes I wish they could understand sarcasm more than they seem to. I feel like I have to dumb things down for them, and I don't mind doing that from time to time but I don't know if I could do it all the time. It would feel like there's a whole part of my personality that I wouldn't be able to express properly, which would irritate me. I'm willing to adapt a bit but I couldn't adapt too much.

For example, recently I was chatting with a girl and this is how the conversation went :




ME - Yes I like your country. A whole country made up of islands. What a great idea.

HER - u try to visit here

ME - Ok I'll be there in a minute. Just wait there. <----------OBVIOUSLY SARCASM

HER - in a minute? what do u mean?

ME - I'm joking.

HER -

ME - That face has no nose. <---------- IN REFERENCE TO THE SMILEY FACE

HER - coz the person that sends it doesnt have too <-- IT SEEMS LIKE SHE UNDERSTOOD, BUT I DON'T KNOW WHAT SHE'S ON ABOUT

ME - Oh my god, so that's a fake nose? Well I have a secret to tell you. You see my head, that's fake too.

HER - ahh.. u scared me

ME - Yeah I'm just a headless body. And my titi [DICK] is fake too. It's plastic, made in Taiwan. <---COME ON, THAT'S FUNNY

HER - ur not funny




I thought it was a pretty funny joke. But she didn't. Her attitude pis sed me off, considering that I was only trying to make her laugh. So I left the conversation for a week, and today I sent her this :

ME - Oh, really? Well, what can I say. I'm so sorry that my joke didn't impress your highness. Maybe I should chat with peasant girls instead of someone as amazing as you.



Obviously I'm being very sarcastic. I'm implying that she's uptight and can't take a little harmless joke. She hasn't responded. I don't know why and that doesn't bother me too much, but now I'm wondering if she even understands my tone. Does she get what I'm implying? Or does she actually think that I'm complimenting her by referring to her as amazing? I wouldn't be surprised if she's totally missed the point. I mean, if she thinks I can be there in 5 minutes, who knows what else she's capable of misunderstanding.

You can totally joke like this with certain Filipina girls who have great English and likely a middle class background. It's much tougher with those away from Manila area and/or those with not such strong English. I've had great banter loaded with sexual talk with certain types of Manila girls or even very educated girls with great English from certain other cities. But if they don't fit this niche, you gotta be a lot more elementary in your communications (especially early ones) so as not to confuse or offend. Keep the jokes, light, simple, and innocent. I once called called someone silly in a joking way (come-on silly, that's not possible) and she got offended and couldn't let it go for awhile.

[Johnny1975]

Lol dude you're bad at talking to women online that you have never met in person. You have to stop trying to be funny and impressing them. Fill their heads up with an image of you both together in the future and they will be impressed. I don't really try to be funny but now and then she finds what I say funny so you don't have to be sarcastic to be funny. Just show them how morally sound you are and ask them about their future plans. Then try to intercept that and combine it with yours. Then paint them the image of you both together. Trust me they like that. Women are imaginative creatures. Why do you think the prince charming fantasy exist even though such men don't exist. But women still believe they do. But yea you have to stop conversing with Asian women like you do AW because the culture is very different and required a different approach. The woman I speak to is a firm/upper middle class but I was able to share my vision of the future we would have together with her. I will need to reinforce that with action by travelling to China but she is already possessive of me. Anyways you have to change your mindset when dealing with women abroad. The culture is not the same brah.

I know what you're saying but I'd appreciate it if you would think before posting. The snippet of conversation that I've posted is just a tiny exchange of words, compared to the massive number of conversations that I've had with many filipinas. If you want to make comments about me and what I am good at or not good at doing, at least have the decency to ask first, and then you'll be in a position to know what you're on about. I don't completely disagree with what the rest of you're saying but it's kind of stupid to tell someone that you haven't met that they can't talk to women online, based only on 1 bit of posted conversation. I could post all the conversations that I've ever had, and all the positive responses, but that would take all day.

This is why I sometimes hate forums. Say one little thing or make a point, and you get misunderstood.

[Johnny1975]

I chat to loads of filipinas on dating sites. I think they're great, but sometimes I wish they could understand sarcasm more than they seem to. I feel like I have to dumb things down for them, and I don't mind doing that from time to time but I don't know if I could do it all the time. It would feel like there's a whole part of my personality that I wouldn't be able to express properly, which would irritate me. I'm willing to adapt a bit but I couldn't adapt too much.

For example, recently I was chatting with a girl and this is how the conversation went :




ME - Yes I like your country. A whole country made up of islands. What a great idea.

HER - u try to visit here

ME - Ok I'll be there in a minute. Just wait there. <----------OBVIOUSLY SARCASM

HER - in a minute? what do u mean?

ME - I'm joking.

HER -

ME - That face has no nose. <---------- IN REFERENCE TO THE SMILEY FACE

HER - coz the person that sends it doesnt have too <-- IT SEEMS LIKE SHE UNDERSTOOD, BUT I DON'T KNOW WHAT SHE'S ON ABOUT

ME - Oh my god, so that's a fake nose? Well I have a secret to tell you. You see my head, that's fake too.

HER - ahh.. u scared me

ME - Yeah I'm just a headless body. And my titi [DICK] is fake too. It's plastic, made in Taiwan. <---COME ON, THAT'S FUNNY

HER - ur not funny




I thought it was a pretty funny joke. But she didn't. Her attitude pis sed me off, considering that I was only trying to make her laugh. So I left the conversation for a week, and today I sent her this :

ME - Oh, really? Well, what can I say. I'm so sorry that my joke didn't impress your highness. Maybe I should chat with peasant girls instead of someone as amazing as you.



Obviously I'm being very sarcastic. I'm implying that she's uptight and can't take a little harmless joke. She hasn't responded. I don't know why and that doesn't bother me too much, but now I'm wondering if she even understands my tone. Does she get what I'm implying? Or does she actually think that I'm complimenting her by referring to her as amazing? I wouldn't be surprised if she's totally missed the point. I mean, if she thinks I can be there in 5 minutes, who knows what else she's capable of misunderstanding.

You can totally joke like this with certain Filipina girls who have great English and likely a middle class background. It's much tougher with those away from Manila area and/or those with not such strong English. I've had great banter loaded with sexual talk with certain types of Manila girls or even very educated girls with great English from certain other cities. But if they don't fit this niche, you gotta be a lot more elementary in your communications (especially early ones) so as not to confuse or offend. Keep the jokes, light, simple, and innocent. I once called called someone silly in a joking way (come-on silly, that's not possible) and she got offended and couldn't let it go for awhile.

I can relate to that. Yes you have to be a bit flexible. I don't think filipinas are really so thick that they don't have the capacity to understand a bit of irony or sarcasm. But some cultures are more geared to that way of thinking than others. And also their level of english plays a part. And who knows, maybe sarcasm is expressed differently in their language. For all I know, filipinos could be very playful indeed. I'm sure they could understand irony in their own language. I've learned to be patient with them, and I find that if you reassure them that you're just being playful, they get it, sort of. Even if they don't get the joke completely, at least they kind of know that it's a joke, and they do respond positively.

I don't know if I could handle being constsntly misunderstood if I was talking to them in person. Being misunderstood is one of my pet hates. I like to think that if I was chatting in person and they could see the expression on my face when I talk, that they would sense a joke or an ironic statement when they hear it.

[RedMenace]

Lol dude you're bad at talking to women online that you have never met in person. You have to stop trying to be funny and impressing them. Fill their heads up with an image of you both together in the future and they will be impressed. I don't really try to be funny but now and then she finds what I say funny so you don't have to be sarcastic to be funny. Just show them how morally sound you are and ask them about their future plans. Then try to intercept that and combine it with yours. Then paint them the image of you both together. Trust me they like that. Women are imaginative creatures. Why do you think the prince charming fantasy exist even though such men don't exist. But women still believe they do. But yea you have to stop conversing with Asian women like you do AW because the culture is very different and required a different approach. The woman I speak to is a firm/upper middle class but I was able to share my vision of the future we would have together with her. I will need to reinforce that with action by travelling to China but she is already possessive of me. Anyways you have to change your mindset when dealing with women abroad. The culture is not the same brah.

I know what you're saying but I'd appreciate it if you would think before posting. The snippet of conversation that I've posted is just a tiny exchange of words, compared to the massive number of conversations that I've had with many filipinas. If you want to make comments about me and what I am good at or not good at doing, at least have the decency to ask first, and then you'll be in a position to know what you're on about. I don't completely disagree with what the rest of you're saying but it's kind of stupid to tell someone that you haven't met that they can't talk to women online, based only on 1 bit of posted conversation. I could post all the conversations that I've ever had, and all the positive responses, but that would take all day.

This is why I sometimes hate forums. Say one little thing or make a point, and you get misunderstood.

I apologise. I only drew conclusion based on the snippet you posted so don't take it seriously. But really decent Asian women don't find sex jokes funny. These women are looking for a potential husband not a one night stand.

[Johnny1975]

Lol dude you're bad at talking to women online that you have never met in person. You have to stop trying to be funny and impressing them. Fill their heads up with an image of you both together in the future and they will be impressed. I don't really try to be funny but now and then she finds what I say funny so you don't have to be sarcastic to be funny. Just show them how morally sound you are and ask them about their future plans. Then try to intercept that and combine it with yours. Then paint them the image of you both together. Trust me they like that. Women are imaginative creatures. Why do you think the prince charming fantasy exist even though such men don't exist. But women still believe they do. But yea you have to stop conversing with Asian women like you do AW because the culture is very different and required a different approach. The woman I speak to is a firm/upper middle class but I was able to share my vision of the future we would have together with her. I will need to reinforce that with action by travelling to China but she is already possessive of me. Anyways you have to change your mindset when dealing with women abroad. The culture is not the same brah.

I know what you're saying but I'd appreciate it if you would think before posting. The snippet of conversation that I've posted is just a tiny exchange of words, compared to the massive number of conversations that I've had with many filipinas. If you want to make comments about me and what I am good at or not good at doing, at least have the decency to ask first, and then you'll be in a position to know what you're on about. I don't completely disagree with what the rest of you're saying but it's kind of stupid to tell someone that you haven't met that they can't talk to women online, based only on 1 bit of posted conversation. I could post all the conversations that I've ever had, and all the positive responses, but that would take all day.

This is why I sometimes hate forums. Say one little thing or make a point, and you get misunderstood.

I apologise. I only drew conclusion based on the snippet you posted so don't take it seriously. But really decent Asian women don't find sex jokes funny. These women are looking for a potential husband not a one night stand.

I apologize too. I was being a bit of a bit ch. I'm not sure why, maybe it's my time of the month. I suppose you're right, but I do like to have a bit of lighthearted chat with them. I guess I find it disappointing when I make a harmless joke and they think I'm being vulgar. This doesn't happen often, I'm just highlighting one particular time.

[Rock]

I chat to loads of filipinas on dating sites. I think they're great, but sometimes I wish they could understand sarcasm more than they seem to. I feel like I have to dumb things down for them, and I don't mind doing that from time to time but I don't know if I could do it all the time. It would feel like there's a whole part of my personality that I wouldn't be able to express properly, which would irritate me. I'm willing to adapt a bit but I couldn't adapt too much.

For example, recently I was chatting with a girl and this is how the conversation went :




ME - Yes I like your country. A whole country made up of islands. What a great idea.

HER - u try to visit here

ME - Ok I'll be there in a minute. Just wait there. <----------OBVIOUSLY SARCASM

HER - in a minute? what do u mean?

ME - I'm joking.

HER -

ME - That face has no nose. <---------- IN REFERENCE TO THE SMILEY FACE

HER - coz the person that sends it doesnt have too <-- IT SEEMS LIKE SHE UNDERSTOOD, BUT I DON'T KNOW WHAT SHE'S ON ABOUT

ME - Oh my god, so that's a fake nose? Well I have a secret to tell you. You see my head, that's fake too.

HER - ahh.. u scared me

ME - Yeah I'm just a headless body. And my titi [DICK] is fake too. It's plastic, made in Taiwan. <---COME ON, THAT'S FUNNY

HER - ur not funny




I thought it was a pretty funny joke. But she didn't. Her attitude pis sed me off, considering that I was only trying to make her laugh. So I left the conversation for a week, and today I sent her this :

ME - Oh, really? Well, what can I say. I'm so sorry that my joke didn't impress your highness. Maybe I should chat with peasant girls instead of someone as amazing as you.



Obviously I'm being very sarcastic. I'm implying that she's uptight and can't take a little harmless joke. She hasn't responded. I don't know why and that doesn't bother me too much, but now I'm wondering if she even understands my tone. Does she get what I'm implying? Or does she actually think that I'm complimenting her by referring to her as amazing? I wouldn't be surprised if she's totally missed the point. I mean, if she thinks I can be there in 5 minutes, who knows what else she's capable of misunderstanding.

You can totally joke like this with certain Filipina girls who have great English and likely a middle class background. It's much tougher with those away from Manila area and/or those with not such strong English. I've had great banter loaded with sexual talk with certain types of Manila girls or even very educated girls with great English from certain other cities. But if they don't fit this niche, you gotta be a lot more elementary in your communications (especially early ones) so as not to confuse or offend. Keep the jokes, light, simple, and innocent. I once called called someone silly in a joking way (come-on silly, that's not possible) and she got offended and couldn't let it go for awhile.

I can relate to that. Yes you have to be a bit flexible. I don't think filipinas are really so thick that they don't have the capacity to understand a bit of irony or sarcasm. But some cultures are more geared to that way of thinking than others. And also their level of english plays a part. And who knows, maybe sarcasm is expressed differently in their language. For all I know, filipinos could be very playful indeed. I'm sure they could understand irony in their own language. I've learned to be patient with them, and I find that if you reassure them that you're just being playful, they get it, sort of. Even if they don't get the joke completely, at least they kind of know that it's a joke, and they do respond positively.

I don't know if I could handle being constsntly misunderstood if I was talking to them in person. Being misunderstood is one of my pet hates. I like to think that if I was chatting in person and they could see the expression on my face when I talk, that they would sense a joke or an ironic statement when they hear it.

If you wanna be a lot safer, follow the sarcastic statement with the word, JOKE. I see certain Filipinas do this a lot. Like a girl might say, "Hmm, no wonder he was looking this way, I'm wearing my short skirt ad look so sexy, JOKE"

[Ava Paige]

I chat to loads of filipinas on dating sites. I think they're great, but sometimes I wish they could understand sarcasm more than they seem to. I feel like I have to dumb things down for them, and I don't mind doing that from time to time but I don't know if I could do it all the time. It would feel like there's a whole part of my personality that I wouldn't be able to express properly, which would irritate me. I'm willing to adapt a bit but I couldn't adapt too much.

For example, recently I was chatting with a girl and this is how the conversation went :




ME - Yes I like your country. A whole country made up of islands. What a great idea.

HER - u try to visit here

ME - Ok I'll be there in a minute. Just wait there. <----------OBVIOUSLY SARCASM

HER - in a minute? what do u mean?

ME - I'm joking.

HER -

ME - That face has no nose. <---------- IN REFERENCE TO THE SMILEY FACE

HER - coz the person that sends it doesnt have too <-- IT SEEMS LIKE SHE UNDERSTOOD, BUT I DON'T KNOW WHAT SHE'S ON ABOUT

ME - Oh my god, so that's a fake nose? Well I have a secret to tell you. You see my head, that's fake too.

HER - ahh.. u scared me

ME - Yeah I'm just a headless body. And my titi [DICK] is fake too. It's plastic, made in Taiwan. <---COME ON, THAT'S FUNNY

HER - ur not funny




I thought it was a pretty funny joke. But she didn't. Her attitude pis sed me off, considering that I was only trying to make her laugh. So I left the conversation for a week, and today I sent her this :

ME - Oh, really? Well, what can I say. I'm so sorry that my joke didn't impress your highness. Maybe I should chat with peasant girls instead of someone as amazing as you.



Obviously I'm being very sarcastic. I'm implying that she's uptight and can't take a little harmless joke. She hasn't responded. I don't know why and that doesn't bother me too much, but now I'm wondering if she even understands my tone. Does she get what I'm implying? Or does she actually think that I'm complimenting her by referring to her as amazing? I wouldn't be surprised if she's totally missed the point. I mean, if she thinks I can be there in 5 minutes, who knows what else she's capable of misunderstanding.

If I were her, here's how I would probably reply:

YOU - Yes I like your country. A whole country made up of islands. What a great idea.

ME - Yeah. More separate islets, more beaches, more bikini babes, more fun.

ME - Ok I'll be there in a minute. Just wait there. <----------OBVIOUSLY SARCASM

HER - Okay, I can wait forever. (corny, I know)

ME - I'm joking.

HER -Okay, I'll laugh now.

ME - That face has no nose.

HER - :O) There. Happy?

ME - Oh my god, so that's a fake nose? Well I have a secret to tell you. You see my head, that's fake too.

HER - Wow where'd you buy that? Probably cost a lot for something as good looking as that (yeah, another cheesy line)

ME - Yeah I'm just a headless body. And my titi [DICK] is fake too. It's plastic, made in Taiwan. <---COME ON, THAT'S FUNNY

HER - What a coincidence! Mine is fake too, made in Japan. I've got high-end technology down here.


I know I'm not a funny person, but I never give up. Lol
Anyway, the number one rule in chatting Filipina girls is: Never mention a genital. That's very very offensive if the girl you're chatting with is conservative or just want to be friends with you. Of course, this does not apply if you're sexting and talking dirty.
Any mention of genital or anything that has to do with sexual stuff is like a cuss word to a traditional-minded Filipina. It also gives out an impression that you are a pervert and indecent guy. I know you guys don't mean to come across as disrespectful, but you have to understand that not all girls get what you actually mean.

Plus, always match your language to your chat buddy's English ability. Philippines may be the best English-speaking country in Asia, but not all people here know about Western culture and humor. Same as if you learn a foreign language, you may understand the literal meanings, but you might struggle with idioms and sarcasms. All women would agree with me that we like funny and humorous men, but too much sarcasm can make someone feel uncomfortable especially if they don't exactly get it.

So next time you chat with non-native English speakers (or chatters), take it easy on them.

[Johnny1975]

Rock, I do tell them that I'm kidding, but I don't like to do it during the joke. First I wait to see how they react. Otherwise it comes across as a bit pus sy-ish. I know filipinas don't care that much but still, I like to maintain some dignity. It's bad enough to have to point it out at all, without doing it straight away after, as though I'm scared of her reaction.