Filipinas and sarcasm

[Johnny1975]

Your comments are fair, Ava. But I'm just such a playful guy, I can't help flirting with them. It's one of the many things that make me such a catch.

[kai1275]

Lol dude you're bad at talking to women online that you have never met in person. You have to stop trying to be funny and impressing them. Fill their heads up with an image of you both together in the future and they will be impressed. I don't really try to be funny but now and then she finds what I say funny so you don't have to be sarcastic to be funny. Just show them how morally sound you are and ask them about their future plans. Then try to intercept that and combine it with yours. Then paint them the image of you both together. Trust me they like that. Women are imaginative creatures. Why do you think the prince charming fantasy exist even though such men don't exist. But women still believe they do. But yea you have to stop conversing with Asian women like you do AW because the culture is very different and required a different approach. The woman I speak to is a firm/upper middle class but I was able to share my vision of the future we would have together with her. I will need to reinforce that with action by travelling to China but she is already possessive of me. Anyways you have to change your mindset when dealing with women abroad. The culture is not the same brah.

I know what you're saying but I'd appreciate it if you would think before posting. The snippet of conversation that I've posted is just a tiny exchange of words, compared to the massive number of conversations that I've had with many filipinas. If you want to make comments about me and what I am good at or not good at doing, at least have the decency to ask first, and then you'll be in a position to know what you're on about. I don't completely disagree with what the rest of you're saying but it's kind of stupid to tell someone that you haven't met that they can't talk to women online, based only on 1 bit of posted conversation. I could post all the conversations that I've ever had, and all the positive responses, but that would take all day.

This is why I sometimes hate forums. Say one little thing or make a point, and you get misunderstood.

I apologise. I only drew conclusion based on the snippet you posted so don't take it seriously. But really decent Asian women don't find sex jokes funny. These women are looking for a potential husband not a one night stand.

You don't need to apologize for what you said. You were pretty much spot on. Be honest. No need to lie in here. He cannot shake your shorts over the toilet just because you are a young buck.

Keep your day job Johnny. You are not funny, not even a little bit, and you do not know how to talk to women at all. You are mad that little gal put you on blast and called you out for it. If I were you I would take Red's advice to heart and use that. You sounded like an arrogant, no-game having, dry, and sarcastic British soppy wanker talking to a Asian woman with very weak English skills and it showed.

[tyme59]

Remember, sarcasm is often to hard for the reader to figure out when reading. Just because you are writing with sarcasm intended does not necessarily mean the reader, of any culture, will interpret it in such a manner.

I tend to lean on sarcasm myself, and most of the time, one can tell it by my delivery (when talking). When writing it's a different matter.

Luckily, the girl I talk to for the PI understands it, most of the time. If I say something really off the wall, then I will usually put a "j/k" or "hahaha" or "lol" after it just so she knows I am kidding around and being playful. Most of the time she respons with "I know you are". But every once in awhile she doesn't get it and asks "what do you mean". It's part of cultural difference. I ask her the same when she says something rather confusing to me.

My point to all this... Hell, I dont know. Sarcasm can be misconstrued when in type. You are probably better off doing less of it.

[skateboardstephen]

I went through the same thing when i was dating a Filipina.She was acting all goofy one day and i asked her if she was smoking something implying that she was high.I was just joking but she got so upset with me for that.

[kai1275]

Remember, sarcasm is often to hard for the reader to figure out when reading. Just because you are writing with sarcasm intended does not necessarily mean the reader, of any culture, will interpret it in such a manner.

I tend to lean on sarcasm myself, and most of the time, one can tell it by my delivery (when talking). When writing it's a different matter.

Luckily, the girl I talk to for the PI understands it, most of the time. If I say something really off the wall, then I will usually put a "j/k" or "hahaha" or "lol" after it just so she knows I am kidding around and being playful. Most of the time she respons with "I know you are". But every once in awhile she doesn't get it and asks "what do you mean". It's part of cultural difference. I ask her the same when she says something rather confusing to me.

My point to all this... Hell, I dont know. Sarcasm can be misconstrued when in type. You are probably better off doing less of it.

Exactly. Take any speech or effective communication type class, and you will never see sarcasm being used for communication purposes. Sarcasm is best used between people that share much of the same experiences as yourself or culture. Like your male friends....not a potential wife or girlfriend being interviewed. Any good comedian's first rule is to "Know Your Audience!" If you cannot figure that out, you are a terrible comedian.

[davewe]

I chat to loads of filipinas on dating sites. I think they're great, but sometimes I wish they could understand sarcasm more than they seem to. I feel like I have to dumb things down for them, and I don't mind doing that from time to time but I don't know if I could do it all the time. It would feel like there's a whole part of my personality that I wouldn't be able to express properly, which would irritate me. I'm willing to adapt a bit but I couldn't adapt too much.

For example, recently I was chatting with a girl and this is how the conversation went :




ME - Yes I like your country. A whole country made up of islands. What a great idea.

HER - u try to visit here

ME - Ok I'll be there in a minute. Just wait there. <----------OBVIOUSLY SARCASM

HER - in a minute? what do u mean?

ME - I'm joking.

HER -

ME - That face has no nose. <---------- IN REFERENCE TO THE SMILEY FACE

HER - coz the person that sends it doesnt have too <-- IT SEEMS LIKE SHE UNDERSTOOD, BUT I DON'T KNOW WHAT SHE'S ON ABOUT

ME - Oh my god, so that's a fake nose? Well I have a secret to tell you. You see my head, that's fake too.

HER - ahh.. u scared me

ME - Yeah I'm just a headless body. And my titi [DICK] is fake too. It's plastic, made in Taiwan. <---COME ON, THAT'S FUNNY

HER - ur not funny




I thought it was a pretty funny joke. But she didn't. Her attitude pis sed me off, considering that I was only trying to make her laugh. So I left the conversation for a week, and today I sent her this :

ME - Oh, really? Well, what can I say. I'm so sorry that my joke didn't impress your highness. Maybe I should chat with peasant girls instead of someone as amazing as you.



Obviously I'm being very sarcastic. I'm implying that she's uptight and can't take a little harmless joke. She hasn't responded. I don't know why and that doesn't bother me too much, but now I'm wondering if she even understands my tone. Does she get what I'm implying? Or does she actually think that I'm complimenting her by referring to her as amazing? I wouldn't be surprised if she's totally missed the point. I mean, if she thinks I can be there in 5 minutes, who knows what else she's capable of misunderstanding.

You can totally joke like this with certain Filipina girls who have great English and likely a middle class background. It's much tougher with those away from Manila area and/or those with not such strong English. I've had great banter loaded with sexual talk with certain types of Manila girls or even very educated girls with great English from certain other cities. But if they don't fit this niche, you gotta be a lot more elementary in your communications (especially early ones) so as not to confuse or offend. Keep the jokes, light, simple, and innocent. I once called called someone silly in a joking way (come-on silly, that's not possible) and she got offended and couldn't let it go for awhile.

I can relate to that. Yes you have to be a bit flexible. I don't think filipinas are really so thick that they don't have the capacity to understand a bit of irony or sarcasm. But some cultures are more geared to that way of thinking than others. And also their level of english plays a part. And who knows, maybe sarcasm is expressed differently in their language. For all I know, filipinos could be very playful indeed. I'm sure they could understand irony in their own language. I've learned to be patient with them, and I find that if you reassure them that you're just being playful, they get it, sort of. Even if they don't get the joke completely, at least they kind of know that it's a joke, and they do respond positively.

I don't know if I could handle being constsntly misunderstood if I was talking to them in person. Being misunderstood is one of my pet hates. I like to think that if I was chatting in person and they could see the expression on my face when I talk, that they would sense a joke or an ironic statement when they hear it.

If you wanna be a lot safer, follow the sarcastic statement with the word, JOKE. I see certain Filipinas do this a lot. Like a girl might say, "Hmm, no wonder he was looking this way, I'm wearing my short skirt ad look so sexy, JOKE"

+1

My girl says "joke" all the time. Simply reinforce that what you are saying is a joke and they will laugh, even if they really don't get the joke.

However, I still maintain that the nature of sarcasm is not common in the culture. So don't assume that because a girl doesn't pick up on what seems like obvious sarcasm she is dumb or thick. Unless she has strong English skills + dealings with foreigners it will still be beyond her. Now she may laugh because she wants to please you, but if you ask her what the joke meant, she won't be able to tell you.

[RedMenace]

See I have a policy when I first come into contact with foreign women. Stay away from those who speak good English. The moment I realise their English is good it puts me off. It's a sign that she has had a lot of contact with western culture which for me means she is probably been penetrated by god knows how many rooshv type foreigners. These are not the type of women I would want to make long term plans with. I would only f*ck them and move along.

I like having to teach the woman English to a level we can talk about deep issues. I achieved this a while ago. You just have to be cool and calm during times of misunderstandings. Also teaching her English is probably one of the best smoke screens to eventually date her. I dislike meeting girls online specifically for dating because these women are most of the time not wife material. That's why they are on the internet looking for men. This should be a dead giveaway considering women control the dating scene and men almost always have to make the effort. So if a woman goes online to find men, there must be a problem.

[Array9]

ME - Yeah I'm just a headless body. And my titi [D**K] is fake too. It's plastic, made in Taiwan. <---COME ON, THAT'S FUNNY

HER - ur not funny


I thought it was a pretty funny joke. But she didn't. Her attitude pis sed me off, considering that I was only trying to make her laugh. So I left the conversation for a week, and today I sent her this :

When dealing with a Filipina that you don't know very well, stay away from the sexual references. These girls already have a bad image of the foreign guys they meet online.

One of the most common complaints I hear from girls are guys who flash their junk on cam or guys who come right out and ask to see them naked.

[kai1275]

ME - Yeah I'm just a headless body. And my titi [D**K] is fake too. It's plastic, made in Taiwan. <---COME ON, THAT'S FUNNY

HER - ur not funny


I thought it was a pretty funny joke. But she didn't. Her attitude pis sed me off, considering that I was only trying to make her laugh. So I left the conversation for a week, and today I sent her this :

When dealing with a Filipina that you don't know very well, stay away from the sexual references. These girls already have a bad image of the foreign guys they meet online.

One of the most common complaints I hear from girls are guys who flash their junk on cam or guys who come right out and ask to see them naked.

PFFFFFFFFT!! LMFAO!!!!

That is hilarious!!!

You are right though. Most Westerners are VERY perverted, without being aware of it, and that is a very good way to run a good Asian girl off.

[Johnny1975]

You don't need to apologize for what you said. You were pretty much spot on. Be honest. No need to lie in here. He cannot shake your shorts over the toilet just because you are a young buck.

Keep your day job Johnny. You are not funny, not even a little bit, and you do not know how to talk to women at all. You are mad that little gal put you on blast and called you out for it. If I were you I would take Red's advice to heart and use that. You sounded like an arrogant, no-game having, dry, and sarcastic British soppy wanker talking to a Asian woman with very weak English skills and it showed.

I know you don't mean any of that, Kai. If it was coming from anyone else I might be a little bit hurt, but it's you, so, you know. But you should know that I'm a spanish wanker.

[kai1275]

You don't need to apologize for what you said. You were pretty much spot on. Be honest. No need to lie in here. He cannot shake your shorts over the toilet just because you are a young buck.

Keep your day job Johnny. You are not funny, not even a little bit, and you do not know how to talk to women at all. You are mad that little gal put you on blast and called you out for it. If I were you I would take Red's advice to heart and use that. You sounded like an arrogant, no-game having, dry, and sarcastic British soppy wanker talking to a Asian woman with very weak English skills and it showed.

I know you don't mean any of that, Kai. If it was coming from anyone else I might be a little bit hurt, but it's you, so, you know. But you should know that I'm a spanish wanker.

Good. If you take that whoopin' in stride and step your game up, you can be a better man for it. Believe it or not, I did the same shit you did years ago too. It takes a wanker to know one.

I give you a hard time in order to drive the point home. If I just simply told you "Please do not bring your Western-style humor and bad habits into a dating relationship with Asian girls please." You would have tuned me out. If I throw a fuggin shoe at the wall near your head and you do not try to fight me, we will have a chance to fix your issue, now that I have your attention.

[Johnny1975]

You don't need to apologize for what you said. You were pretty much spot on. Be honest. No need to lie in here. He cannot shake your shorts over the toilet just because you are a young buck.

Keep your day job Johnny. You are not funny, not even a little bit, and you do not know how to talk to women at all. You are mad that little gal put you on blast and called you out for it. If I were you I would take Red's advice to heart and use that. You sounded like an arrogant, no-game having, dry, and sarcastic British soppy wanker talking to a Asian woman with very weak English skills and it showed.

I know you don't mean any of that, Kai. If it was coming from anyone else I might be a little bit hurt, but it's you, so, you know. But you should know that I'm a spanish wanker.

Good. If you take that whoopin' in stride and step your game up, you can be a better man for it. Believe it or not, I did the same shit you did years ago too. It takes a wanker to know one.

I give you a hard time in order to drive the point home. If I just simply told you "Please do not bring your Western-style humor and bad habits into a dating relationship with Asian girls please." You would have tuned me out. If I throw a fuggin shoe at the wall near your head and you do not try to fight me, we will have a chance to fix your issue, now that I have your attention.

Yeah it's ok. My ego isn't threatened by a low status loser like you. But really I don't think there's anything wrong with my humour. The problem is that for it to be understood by a filipina, I have to be make more effort to make it clear that it's just a joke than I would with a western girl. 99% of the time they do get it, but I just have to point it out. I don't like having to do it but I do, if necessary.

And you're forgetting something very fundamental, which is that we should always maintain frame. Just because a particular girl doesn't get a joke it doesn't mean that the joke was bad. I'd rather take a risk and then explain the comment to them and hope that they're cool with it (and be prepared to walk away if she insists that I'm a twit), than talk to them like a love sick puppy and keeping everything safe and lovey dovey all the time. That's not the Johnnyy1975 way. And if they do get it, it suddenly changes the dynamic and opens up a whole new way of communicating which is more exciting. If you crack a risky joke or make a suggestive comment and they get it, before you know it you could be opening up a whole new dimension to the interaction. And that's what I'm going for.

My aim isn't just to please. My aim is to assess.

[Maverick]

Johnny, it depends on the girl.

The girl that I've been talking to for the past few months is HUGE on joking around and sarcasm. Although, what Dave said was true with her also. She said "joke" for probably the first month we were talking. Now, she never says it (since we've gotten to know each other really well). I would say that she has a good balance of sarcasm and sweetness and is very tactful in her delivery. I truly enjoy talking to this girl and I LOVE her humor!

I've found that middle class girls with college educations are the way to go for this kind of thing.

[mguy]

Filipinas are HUGE on sarcasm! They are always very playful and engaging, so much more than their western counterparts.

You know what is "in" in the Philippines? Pick-up lines. I swear. The funnier the pickup line the better it is.

Ask your girl if she has a good pick up line.. I guarantee she will have several. This shit is even on the radio.

[Johnny1975]

Filipinas are HUGE on sarcasm! They are always very playful and engaging, so much more than their western counterparts.

You know what is "in" in the Philippines? Pick-up lines. I swear. The funnier the pickup line the better it is.

Ask your girl if she has a good pick up line.. I guarantee she will have several. This shit is even on the radio.

Sounds interesting. Keep talking.