Epidemic of Male virgins in America

[fschmidt]

Why is it an epidemic?

This planet is suffering from an epidemic of humans, but I expect that to be cured soon.

[GoingAwol]

What a load of BS. You sound like some typical keybaord alpha from ROTK or some similar PUA bullshit site.

This whole "everything is your own fault because you are only responsible for your life" kind of nonsense is exactly what is wrong with our societies today. Women can always get sex whenever they want, a man must jump through a million hoops and still settle for anything he can get. Not all men have the time and patience for that. Why do you think there is still p4p in our country ?

And no, darwinism has nothing to do with it. Most women cannot even grasp that concept, conidering the dumb decisions they make in life.

Never went to Return of Kings and never got into PUA, never needed it either. Getting women is not a science and treating it like it is, seems retarded to me. Never used p4p either. I also rarely if ever use the words "alpha" or "beta" in an unironic way, and never to my knowledge have I described myself as "alpha".

My post was directed at guys who are a virgin at an age were being a virgin is abnormal, yet who undertake zero action to combat their problems. The type of guy who expects sex to just fall on their lap without trying, who want women to just trip and fall on their dicks as they walk by, when that's simply not how the world works. And you are right... it is a lot easier to get laid for a woman, but for men who aren't hideously deformed, grossly out of shape or socially awkward it isn't exactly hard either... all it takes nowadays for a decent-looking guy is one Tinder "swipe" the right way and he'll be balls deep in some slut within hours.

Some guys have the opinion that, when a woman does not have to do much to get sex, he shouldn't have to either. Because it's unfair. They whine and cry and throw tantrums like a toddler, and blame all their misfortunes on others. Sometimes, the problem isn't others, sometimes it's you. Some men are virgins because they never tried. And sure there's always prostitution, but that's not the only way; it's just the easiest, and the most expensive.

As far as Darwinism goes... say you have two guys. They are both flabby with bad skin and not-too-great social skills. They are both virgins. Guy number one hates his situation, understandably, but grows tired of playing the blame game. Maybe, just maybe, it's him that needs to make changes? Having come to this conclusion, he changes his diet and lifestyle drastically, gets in shape, starts to dress better and socializes, improving his conversation skills. His newfound confidence is the final push, pushing him in the right direction... he gets in a flow where he feels he can do anything. He talks to girls, befriends a few, and ends up losing his virginity. One day, he knocks his girlfriend up and has a family.

Now there's guy number two, he's equally flabby, equally shy and equally awkward and virginal. He is pissed off at the world and unwilling to put the blame at himself. He does not realize that he is not appealing, and puts in no effort to make himself more appealing in any way, shape or form. Fast forward ten years, he's still flabby, his skin is still shit, his social skills still awful, but he lost his virginity to a hooker. He gets older and older, and as his belly grows and the years go by, so grows his hatred for women and society. Every day he posts about the women he hates so much, the women that won't give him the time of day, but who he never even tries to talk to. One day he dies, a miserable recluse, childless and alone.

Now there's your Darwinism.

Sorry to be blunt, but you don't know what the f**k you are talking about. You are obviously one of the typical assholes (the type of guy women love) that has been getting women effortlessly your whole life. It's obvious to me that you have never experienced what its like to be shut out and rejected by women. I have! I'm 24 years old and have tried my damndest to meet women since I was a teenager like any other redblooded young man. And women just haven't been f***ing interested in me! I have been rejected hundreds of times. And I'm an average looking decent guy that just wants to find a nice girl. I have lots of friends that like me, work a full time job, and go to college. I'm a normal guy in every way except for the fact that women won't give me the time of day. So f**k you and your stereotypes. Your "blame the man" attitude is typical in America and its a big reason why women here are so f***ed up.

[Wolfeye]

I think there are two extra points (at least):

One thing is that someone might very well be consciencous & act on it. There's a saying that "it's better to be alone than in bad company" & it's true. Actually, even if you find good company, you potentially would be immersed in bad conditions WITH that bad company. This seems to be the case with America & is steadily getting worse on that level. I usually get along well with women & I wasn't always getting rejected or anything, I just more or less abstained from society & am now trying to get to a different one. One can't go fishing without being in the ocean & it's the ocean I had a problem with.

[Additionally: I lived a variation of the "Jerry Springer lifestyle" when I was younger & I'm quite aware of the fact that it could have gone A LOT worse (actually, for several friends I had, it did). I logically figure that f***ing can lead to having kids, which I obviously am not looking to do with the wrong woman. In short, f***ing the WRONG woman can f**k up your whole life & whatever the lives of whatever kids you might have with her- even if they're unexpected. Not avoiding women & relationships because of that, but there are some places that are a high "avalanche risk." Can't figure out how I'm supposed to separate the two, so I just hold back.]

The other (about GoingAwol's post right above this one) is that some women are like Peggy Bundy from the show Married with Children- just good looking & don't hold up their end in any other way. It can also be that she WANTS to be other than that, but feels like she's being a sell-out or something. I think that a lot of women are also getting very workaholic & career-oriented for that same reason- it's like being some down-trodden woman to do otherwise. When MEN screw up like that, it's cliche problem- when WOMEN do it, it's successful? I think women also are a little paranoid about men, but with good reason- a lot more of them seem to be crazy in a way that needs a bullet. Don't know what it's from, but so many guys seem like pissy little dictators with delusions of all sorts.

It might be a stretch, but maybe a small part of it is that the cops are more frequently like that & maybe they're thinking "Oh,shit- if he's nuts, my recourse is going to be just as bad or worse." The whole thing might be a bit subliminal & not the kind of thing they can immediately put into words, but maybe that's a part of it? I know I don't like the prospect of my kid growing up in that element & if there's progressively more reason to believe that this element will make an appearance (because everything's illegal & instigation is possible), well it doesn't put me in too lustful of a mood. I still HAVE those urges, but it's something that f***s up the whole flow of things.

[drronnie]

Male virgins above a certain age are usually nature's way of weeding out the weak, the indecisive and the unfit from procreating. Not counting those who remain virgins for religious reasons who may very well marry and have families of their own at one point.

The type of man who cannot get laid and instead whines about his lack of action from behind his cosy chair & desk at home, is not the type of guy that Mother Nature and God intended to procreate in the first place. A male virgin often is a man without drive or passion, without power or conviction. He does a lot of contemplating, complaining and reflecting, but very little to actually combat the situation he is in. He cries over what he lacks, but does very little to make up for it.

A male virgin in his twenties or older is seen as a defective human being by most. And harsh as this may sound, there is a lot of common sense in that. Because if you live in a country with an abundance of sluts and easy, immoral women, there really is no reason for you not to get laid and your inability to do so hints at a problem on your part.

The virgin Western male is a male who failed to adapt to a society that is corrupt, and who simultaneously refused to leave said society for greener pastures. He wants his cake and eat it too, but never takes the walk to the bakery so he remains hungry.

Yep thats pretty much me in a nutshell

[mattyman]

Ah, narrative I've heard before; male virgin=loser. Let's question it.

People end-up not finding significant others at the far end of the bell curve for many reasons; the most obvious being not having a well-connected social circle to meet people through. If one has for example been too socially-anxious during those periods of his life when opportunities where (supposedly) abundant, then it isn't fair to blame him, if for example, his life circumstances get in the way post college/uni; work situation (not conducive to meeting new people, living situation, social circle changes. it's a bit shallow and ignorant to jump to such silly conclusions.

^Have you ever met anyone who fits the description? Have you ever taken the time to get to know them or even relate to their situations (I don't give a f**k if I get pigeon-holed).

You mention the abundance of sluts, you fail to notice that most guys are not after sluts, p***y and one-night stands for the sake of saying 'I'm the man', 'i've been there'. That just seems like coming from a place of blissful ignorance and stupidity. GETTING LAID IS NOT THE PRIORITY. It's to feel close to someone, to be a friend as well as a lover. I'ts that that has become extraordinarily difficult. The former, the friend, the person. They are not mutually-exclusive. Stop listening to the likes of roosh and other charlatan morons.

[Shemp]

The real bottom line is that modern society recognizes that the world is overpopulated and that a large population, in and of itself, is no longer an asset. Modern wars are not fought by massed troops like in the 19th century and earlier, nor do factories need huge numbers of low-skilled workers. What is in short supply is highly skilled technical workers, and by highly skilled I'm talking the top .1%, top engineers and scientists from places like MIT. So modern society is putting the screws on the middle and lower classes to punish those who choose to breed. As always, the lower classes are slowest to get the message, but that doesn't matter, since the jobs that still do require a human are mostly the bottom end jobs: like changing old people's diapers or jumping in a construction ditch to grab something or similar jobs that a machine can't do. Part of the process of clamping down on reproduction has the side-effect of clamping down on sex and relationships, even though modern birth control means sex and relationships no longer necessarily implies children. Japan is ahead of the US in the this respect. If you think the epidemic of male virgins in the USA is bad, it is much worse in Japan. The best solution for most young men is masturbation (practicing sexual kung fu to avoid depleting yourself), as I've said repeatedly. Later in life, if you get rich, you can hire sugarbabies, but that is not an option for most young men. If you want some experience of the physical act itself, just hire a prostitute. If you want love, get a dog or cat.

[mattyman]

^Is that what you call progress? Doesn't sound like something that's happiness for all humanity.

[Kradmelder]

Ah, narrative I've heard before; male virgin=loser. Let's question it.

People end-up not finding significant others at the far end of the bell curve for many reasons; the most obvious being not having a well-connected social circle to meet people through. If one has for example been too socially-anxious during those periods of his life when opportunities where (supposedly) abundant, then it isn't fair to blame him, if for example, his life circumstances get in the way post college/uni; work situation (not conducive to meeting new people, living situation, social circle changes. it's a bit shallow and ignorant to jump to such silly conclusions.

^Have you ever met anyone who fits the description? Have you ever taken the time to get to know them or even relate to their situations (I don't give a f**k if I get pigeon-holed).

You mention the abundance of sluts, you fail to notice that most guys are not after sluts, p***y and one-night stands for the sake of saying 'I'm the man', 'i've been there'. That just seems like coming from a place of blissful ignorance and stupidity. GETTING LAID IS NOT THE PRIORITY. It's to feel close to someone, to be a friend as well as a lover. I'ts that that has become extraordinarily difficult. The former, the friend, the person. They are not mutually-exclusive. Stop listening to the likes of roosh and other charlatan morons.

The sex is far easier to find. I can find many women to have sex with, the woman you can feel close to and who is a partner yet you still find physically attractive is much harder to find. If you do, the pump and dump, which is the best approach to use with many women, would be a huge mistake.

Many young men today don't meet decent young women because they are too caught up with facejew, gaming, stuffing their face with junk food on the couch or computer and other such faggotry. No wonder they don't develop social skills and are socially awkward. Then they blame women.

[Shemp]

The sex is far easier to find. I can find many women to have sex with, the woman you can feel close to and who is a partner yet you still find physically attractive is much harder to find. If you do, the pump and dump, which is the best approach to use with many women, would be a huge mistake.

Many young men today don't meet decent young women because they are too caught up with facejew, gaming, stuffing their face with junk food on the couch or computer and other such faggotry. No wonder they don't develop social skills and are socially awkward. Then they blame women.

Kradmelder can easily get women because he is a member of the top 10%. For every guy in that top 10%, there must, by definition, be someone in the bottom 10%. That's the hard reality of life. For every winner, there's a loser.

I'm the first to encourage young men to improve themselves. Competition isn't all that stiff, especially moving from say 30 percentile to 70 percentile. Working out, getting nice clothes, learning to dance and a few other simple steps should accomplish that for most men at the 30 percentile. But there's a genetic limit to how high a guy can go. Some guys are born short or born ugly and making big money is never easy. And even 70 percentile may not be enough nowadays, for the reason I listed. Namely, many young women are turning away from sex, and the ones who aren't, are all chasing the guys in the top 10%, like Kradmelder, which is precisely why he finds it so easy to get sex.

The hard reality, for most men nowadays, is that sex is hard to obtain. Masturbation is cheap and easy, and frees up time and energy to dabe money and retire young, then move to the Philipines or some other poor country. A man who does that can elevate himself to the top 10% in the poor country partly by virtue of his money and partly by the steps I listed for moving from 30 percentile to 70 percentile, and then he can enjoy the same easy access to sex that Kradmelder currently enjoys.

[snede]

I remember listening to a podcast that mentioned that disabled men are a significant percentage of the clients that sexworkers see in Australia (where it is legal). These are men who have little hope of a relationship because of their low SMV.

Naturally, Feminists hate most sexworkers since it reduces their power over men and destroys the narrative that all sexworkers are exploited victims.

[Eric]

I know this applies to my situation; but I don't know if it does to anyone else. I'm agreeing...sex is not hard to get. It happens and it is part of nature. I'm realizing my whole life I harbor a very strong aversion to sex and 'letting go', partly because I didn't want to be seen as an animal...and the baseness disgusted me, when I was younger. Also, there are so many disastrous fearful consequences I've heard about wuch as STD's, unwanted pregnancies...etc.

So I've kind of grown paranoid and closed down. I've been literally terrified to have it. I realize this is shitty and, no guy really wants this end ... maybe I took things too seriously. but what can I do? Just give in, remove all restrictions and start having more sex? I think it's true, what I'm saying.I may be in that top 10% but I never allow it to happen. Like I said I have too much responsibility in my mind. ..

Maybe I am about to let all that go. Are you irresponsible for having lots of sex, just being natural and do what nature made?
Is that even realistic ...to put all that unnatural pressure on myself?
I'm about to say, just
"#^k it.

I'm still and always will be terrified of the consequences though.
What if something bad happens to me? What if I go to court? ..have a baby by accident etc., ? Shit all goes through my mind.... in the back.

[ChinaFan]

I envy you Eric.

I was a Virgin until age 24 when a woman I had been seeing led me into bed when I was exhausted from helping her out of a stressful situation.

Good sex will blow your mind, but the feeling is temporary. The effects of a sexual relationship, though, can be long-lasting or permanent.
Sex is special. I believe it's God's gift to give you a taste of heaven after you get married and possibly have kids.

Whether you marry first or not, do not give yourself away just for the hell of it. You may be addicted to the first woman you sleep with. She may become addicted to you. Breaking up can be very difficult and emotional, but staying together can bring the most fulfilling relationship you have on Earth.

When you wait until marriage or are 100% sure you are committed to the woman, the sex will feel great physically and psychologically, your openness and reliance on that special woman will justify your current reluctance to just jump into bed with just any woman.

[Eric]

Just to clarify, I'm not a virgin...I've had sex with a few number of women before - some of it was good, some of it was really mind blowingly- great, but as you say it wears off, and is never enough; like an addiction. I have came to be prey to that denigrating insecurity a man gets when he lowers his value to sex and how much he can have. To be fair, I see I've bought into a whole system of belief that is currently tanking the developed western world; which seeks to strip away your individuality, lower and take away your worth, basically make you a serf, with no self-reliance or human value...dependent on some sort of distant 'government' for a place, value or individuality...what used to replace how Gentiles thought.

That's the only way I can explain it, there is no other way to explain it. I'm going back to claiming self worth. It's amazing how you respond, and how others in this modern world are all being guided and directed toward doing...without knowing it. You're inextricably more valuable to a woman, first of all, and be able to procure sex whenever you want (because of worth). It is better to see the glass as half full, than half empty. Put my hands to work hard and achieve without resting or being lazy; basically re embracing the old way I know; and disregarding all this new age bullshit that I've tried out...which was a big mistake I made in my youth 'trying out' and rebelling. A big mistake I am sorry for trying.

[E Irizarry R&B Singer]

Just to clarify, I'm not a virgin...I've had sex with a few number of women before - some of it was good, some of it was really mind blowingly- great, but as you say it wears off, and is never enough; like an addiction. I have came to be prey to that denigrating insecurity a man gets when he lowers his value to sex and how much he can have. To be fair, I see I've bought into a whole system of belief that is currently tanking the developed western world; which seeks to strip away your individuality, lower and take away your worth, basically make you a serf, with no self-reliance or human value...dependent on some sort of distant 'government' for a place, value or individuality...what used to replace how Gentiles thought.

That's the only way I can explain it, there is no other way to explain it. I'm going back to claiming self worth. It's amazing how you respond, and how others in this modern world are all being guided and directed toward doing...without knowing it. You're inextricably more valuable to a woman, first of all, and be able to procure sex whenever you want (because of worth). It is better to see the glass as half full, than half empty. Put my hands to work hard and achieve without resting or being lazy; basically re embracing the old way I know; and disregarding all this new age bullshit that I've tried out...which was a big mistake I made in my youth 'trying out' and rebelling. A big mistake I am sorry for trying.

Dude. I just got disrespected by the longest time I known a foreign woman just to be let down after eight fvcking years. Lesson learned: foreign women are better, not good. Never put all your sperm on the eggs in one basket (no pun intended lmao!) but do fvck other women and never, ever come clean that you have slept with other women. No woman will respect that, and most will not stay with you ever again. I've kept it quiet, she never found out, but that didn't matter in why we broke up; she felt we were too different. What a cun.t. lol But to sum it up: I slept with 400+ women in 20 years so I think I can retire my dick onto the shelf now and just focus on myself. I plan on never returning to South America; what a disaster I"m having here: spending a lot of money, shitty to none R.O.I.

[Eric]

I have never known anyone, any woman that long... I'm very lonely and I realize emotionally its me that has to change. I've pushed women away for so long...and left myself empty, and starving inside. While I have too high standards for myself. I've felt I've not deserved anything, So what it looks like is an empty cavity of lack where I am.

I've woke up with a pit in my stomach and a horrible feeling, that I need to change. It's quite sad. How little I've given myself over the years and how much I've been isolated, need to change this. There is some issues blocking me from it, but it shouldn't have gotten this bad... I need to be much kinder, to myself.

We are coming from completely separate backgrounds.
I guess realizing it and becoming aware, helps. It's still really hard, when you were given no love, but anger; beat the shit out of yourself endlessly as the only fuel there was to move on forward., . always held to do more, unhappy, angry. It's a miserable way to live. It makes you old before your time.