America is a psych bully that tears you down then blames you

[Winston]

American culture is essentially a "psychological bully" in that it tears people down and makes them feel inadequate. Then it blames it on the victims by making them think that it's their fault because they lack "self-esteem" and "self-confidence", as though there was some defect in them that they have to repair. This is comparable to a school bully who bullies others and then blames it on his victims rather than himself. It's all very cruel and sadistic, and yet another reason why it makes perfect sense to get out of such a toxic crazy culture.

To cope with such psychological insecurities created by American culture, most Americans develop phoney personalities and big egos, act fake and arrogant, brag and BS a lot, become bullies themselves, or lose it and go crazy. This is why the American personality seems so fake and artificial, and why nearly everyone born after the 1960's in America seems to have mental issues and psychological baggage, as though they are somehow "messed up". It's all very dysfunctional for sure.

Fortunately, most other cultures are not like that. You see, the reason why foreigners are so much more authentic and down-to-earth is because their country is authentic and down-to-earth as well. Thus they did NOT have to develop fake personalities in order to fit in socially. They were allowed to be themselves. What this means is that YOU can be yourself too, in such foreign cultures that is. That's the GOOD NEWS here.

This is highly significant, because being able to BE YOURSELF is the true definition of freedom, and hence why many expats report that they feel freer abroad than in America. After all, if you can't even be yourself, you can never truly be free.

As one of my forum members, Grunt, said:

viewtopic.php?t=6692

"If anyone feels they "come out of their shell" when overseas, try to keep something in mind. That person you are overseas is the real you. The person you are in America is a prisoner, nothing more."

Have you all noticed that in other countries, people do not struggle or make a big deal out of "self-esteem or confidence"? At least not to the degree that Americans do. That's because those are fake concepts invented by American culture. "Self-esteem" is a modern invention that did not exist before. And "confidence" has been perverted into something very nebulous and artificial.

What Americans really mean when they say that you "lack self-esteem or confidence" is that you need to learn how to act more fake in order to fit into a fake culture like America. It's ridiculous. If you do comply with it, you end up only becoming faker. Ever notice that?

It's also a shaming tactic, for if you don't act fake then there's something wrong with you. It's very upside down, like the Twilight Zone.

[starchild5]

Psychologist rule America than presidents, billionaires. They exactly know where to push our buttons. In India Self-Esteem, Confidence was never a concept but they started making inroads due to American Dollar and Empire.

American values aka lunacy is spreading all over the world. The real Americans who play by the rules are being shunted down, the more fake you are, the higher up you go.

The best example is Manny Pacquio and Floyd Mayweather. Manny is so humble, he talks like a normal human being and floyd is so fake, his stupid arrogance, money, rich BS talk...I can't make any sense of it..even if he is trying to promote himself...as being bad sells in America...If Manny started acting like a rich fake BS'er...Filipinos will take him down....

[jamesbond]

Once again Winston speaks the truth, this causes him to become a lighting rod for some people.

[lozoman]

Totally agree.

[Will N. Dowd]

Well said, I totally agree as usual Winston.

They are a physical bully too, with the largest economy and strongest armed forces in the world they can and do push around anyone they want. And then they wonder why most people don't like them.

[Winston]

Well said, I totally agree as usual Winston.

They are a physical bully too, with the largest economy and strongest armed forces in the world they can and do push around anyone they want. And then they wonder why most people don't like them.

But you're from Canada right? Does Canadian culture also tear you down and then tell you that you need to work on your "confidence or self-esteem" mumbo jumbo like that? Is the social vibe toxic and ego-deflating?

Why is it your fault if you don't fit into a lonely, competitive, toxic culture devoid of human connection? Not everyone fits into that. You can't be something you're not after all. No one can. So how are the misfits at fault?

[Will N. Dowd]

I've never lived in the US but I've visited several times. Canada and the US are next door neighbors, best friends, and the largest economic trading partners in the world. They even have the longest undefended border in the world. The BS that goes on on both sides of it is about the same. What you say rings true here too. I don't think you would notice much difference living here or there. Ask other Canucks on here and I think they will agree. It might even be worse here, you'll have to ask a member that has lived in both places. Canada is sometimes referred to as the 51st state, and is always trying to kiss up to the US. They are pretty much forced too. Sometimes they refuse, for example they fought with the US in the 1st Gulf War, Somalia and Afghanistan, but declined the 2nd Gulf War. The old joke about it goes like this:

Q:Why do Canadian Prime Ministers have bad breath?
A: Because the American Presidents like baked beans.

[Signet]

And "confidence" has been perverted into something very nebulous and artificial.

"Confidence" = learn to be a great liar. Confidence, on its own, is seen as an indicator of past success. Convince people you have been successful when you haven't, and you might have a chance at this job interview/date/lecture/whatever.

Confidence was never not a good thing to have, but now it is a baseline prerequisite for everything, no matter how absurd (kind of like when every single job in a field requires previous experience...um, how is anyone supposed to GET experience?). It seems to me like it's a symptom of instant gratification culture, where we want everything without needing to put forth any effort, so of course we demand that everyone who attempt anything already be, or appear to be, an expert at it. But I'm no psychologist or sociologist, so maybe I'm wrong. Pretty annoying though, especially in the way it escalates as people start adapting. I get not wanting someone to be a stuttering, indecisive, whimpering mess, but I mean, really? The image you are looking for now is actually 'Biff Tannen?'

The best example is Manny Pacquio and Floyd Mayweather. Manny is so humble, he talks like a normal human being and floyd is so fake, his stupid arrogance, money, rich BS talk...I can't make any sense of it..even if he is trying to promote himself...as being bad sells in America...If Manny started acting like a rich fake BS'er...Filipinos will take him down....

Because as near as I can tell, Floyd is the ideal image of what Americans (or at least those that watch boxing) wish they could be: so obnoxiously rich that it actually starts becoming offensive ("I got a solid gold hot tub, but I didn't like the shape, so I blew it up and got a better one!"), able to get in the news whenever they feel like for the most absolutely mundane things, perceived as being incredibly witty when really they just say things with a lot of bluster, always the center of a buzzing cloud of 'haters' that they take to be jealous of them, surrounded by beautiful women and high-status men who all hang on their every word.

I'm a big fan of combat sports, and I get into it with Mayweather fans at least relatively often. Most people don't seem to like Mayweather for his fighting style, they don't even care about his fighting style. They are living vicariously through him. Defenses of Mayweather from casual fans practically always come down to his money.

[Temprano26]

And Donald Trump and Kanye West.

[traveller]

American culture is essentially a "psychological bully" in that it tears people down and makes them feel inadequate. Then it blames it on the victims by making them think that it's their fault because they lack "self-esteem" and "self-confidence", as though there was some defect in them that they have to repair. This is comparable to a school bully who bullies others and then blames it on his victims rather than himself. It's all very cruel and sadistic, and yet another reason why it makes perfect sense to get out of such a toxic crazy culture.

To cope with such psychological insecurities created by American culture, most Americans develop phoney personalities and big egos, act fake and arrogant, brag and BS a lot, become bullies themselves, or lose it and go crazy. This is why the American personality seems so fake and artificial, and why nearly everyone born after the 1960's in America seems to have mental issues and psychological baggage, as though they are somehow "messed up". It's all very dysfunctional for sure.

Fortunately, most other cultures are not like that. You see, the reason why foreigners are so much more authentic and down-to-earth is because their country is authentic and down-to-earth as well. Thus they did NOT have to develop fake personalities in order to fit in socially. They were allowed to be themselves. What this means is that YOU can be yourself too, in such foreign cultures that is. That's the GOOD NEWS here.

This is highly significant, because being able to BE YOURSELF is the true definition of freedom, and hence why many expats report that they feel freer abroad than in America. After all, if you can't even be yourself, you can never truly be free.

As one of my forum members, Grunt, said:

viewtopic.php?t=6692

"If anyone feels they "come out of their shell" when overseas, try to keep something in mind. That person you are overseas is the real you. The person you are in America is a prisoner, nothing more."

Have you all noticed that in other countries, people do not struggle or make a big deal out of "self-esteem or confidence"? At least not to the degree that Americans do. That's because those are fake concepts invented by American culture. "Self-esteem" is a modern invention that did not exist before. And "confidence" has been perverted into something very nebulous and artificial.

What Americans really mean when they say that you "lack self-esteem or confidence" is that you need to learn how to act more fake in order to fit into a fake culture like America. It's ridiculous. If you do comply with it, you end up only becoming faker. Ever notice that?

It's also a shaming tactic, for if you don't act fake then there's something wrong with you. It's very upside down, like the Twilight Zone.

You can say that again, about Illinois!

Illinois is a place that not only tears you to pieces and then blames you, but Illinois apparently loves to pretend that only serial rapists and hardened sex predators would ever fail to even hook up with a University of Illinois at Chicago and/or Northern Illinois University cheerleader! (no wonder the city-data forum acts like it's based in North Korea!). Illinois women are brutally selfish and standoffish, and you practically can not even approach within less than 20 feet of Illinois women without stirring up something nasty. But when Illinoisans in general, both ladies and guys, hear of a guy who can not get a date, they think; "Ah-ha! Sex predator! Serial rapist! Where there's smoke, there's fire!"

What Illinoisans love to say is that, if you (single guy) can not get a date, you belong locked away in a mental institution or psychiatric ward, or even prison.

But at the same time, there are young ladies from all over the Chicagoland metro area moving from the suburbs into the ghetto, where they are hooking up left and right with hardened killers! They're hooking up with guys that get their upwards of $300,000 a year, their luxury sports vehicles, and all else, through crime and illegal drugs!