Japanese men share a list of common male woes before and after marriage

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momopi
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Re: Japanese men share a list of common male woes before and after marriage

Post by momopi »

I was in Japan a few years back to help a Taiwanese friend move back to LA. She worked for Sony and hit career ceiling, didn’t find a husband so decided to move back to California and work as consultant.

Since she was unsuccessful in relationships there, her opinions are negative. Yohan lives in JP and can probably offer a more balanced view.

According to her:

-Japanese men don’t want to get married until 40, and at 40 they want 20 year olds.

- After work the white collar employees go have beer and hook up with employees from other companies. These group events are usually pre arranged and even married men take off their rings and go anyway for a hook up.

- Japanese women can quickly assess a man’s salary range and expected increases / retirement benefits, based on the man’s employer and position. Women who are hunting for husbands may marry and stay married until the husband retires, then hit him with a divorce and take from his retirement fund to go enjoy life.


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chanta76
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Re: Japanese men share a list of common male woes before and after marriage

Post by chanta76 »

Precisely why even in Japan people don't get married.
momopi
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Re: Japanese men share a list of common male woes before and after marriage

Post by momopi »

Here’s a recent video on Japanese Giglo. For those who are not familiar they are men working in host bars catering to women. They are the ultimate adaptable social butterfly catering to wide range of clients in the local eco system.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=TuTD0z_Ji_c
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flowerthief00
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Re: Japanese men share a list of common male woes before and after marriage

Post by flowerthief00 »

There are two types of Japanese men I have experience with. Men who are cheating on a woman. Men who would be cheating on a woman if he only could. And as for consorting with hookers, they don't even consider that cheating.
Japanese are not very romantic either, by all accounts. Not a great place for romance, Japan is.
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Yohan
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Re: Japanese men share a list of common male woes before and after marriage

Post by Yohan »

momopi wrote:
February 21st, 2019, 11:30 am
I was in Japan a few years back to help a Taiwanese friend move back to LA. She worked for Sony and hit career ceiling, didn’t find a husband so decided to move back to California and work as consultant.
Since she was unsuccessful in relationships there, her opinions are negative. Yohan lives in JP and can probably offer a more balanced view.
If a Taiwan-Chinese woman living in LA, hitting career ceiling and works in Japan and cannot find a husband - then I can only say the problem is 'she' - likely expecting by far too much from Japanese men.

BTW, there is also a significant number of Chinese from Taiwan living in Japan, and she did not even find anyone of her own countrymen for a nice relationship?
According to her:
-Japanese men don’t want to get married until 40, and at 40 they want 20 year olds.

- After work the white collar employees go have beer and hook up with employees from other companies. These group events are usually pre arranged and even married men take off their rings and go anyway for a hook up.

- Japanese women can quickly assess a man’s salary range and expected increases / retirement benefits, based on the man’s employer and position. Women who are hunting for husbands may marry and stay married until the husband retires, then hit him with a divorce and take from his retirement fund to go enjoy life.
All Japanese families I know next to me do not show up with a significant age difference between man and wife, usually about same age, same with me and my Japanese wife.

Japanese are obessed with parties, dinners etc. after work. A big business for the restaurant/hotel industry. I always tried to escape such invitations, as I am not much into Japanese food and nonsense talk.

It is not easy to assess a man's salary or retirement benefits in Japan after divorce at all. Same with alimony and child support. In Japan divorce is more or less considered as a private matter. Lawyers are not interested into divorce business except it is about really very rich people. Courts are very reluctant in their rulings and it can take many years for a final decision if the other party objects. Payments of such kind can hardly be enforced. In most rulings courts are considering about 2 to 3 percent of the assets per year of marriage - this means you have to be married around 20 to 25 years to claim 50 percent. No lawyer will touch a divorce case without a prepayment of a considerable amount of money and no court will touch a divorce case without asking for all possible court fees to be paid in advance.

Living in Japan since more than 40 years, I don't know about any divorce among ordinary people through court decisions - never heard of that.
Most young couples try to regulate divorce among themselves, go together to the ward office, sign and move away - young couples don't own much anyway, and elderly people stay legally married but live at different locations as both of them do not consider another marriage again.
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Yohan
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Re: Japanese men share a list of common male woes before and after marriage

Post by Yohan »

flowerthief00 wrote:
March 9th, 2019, 12:25 pm
There are two types of Japanese men I have experience with. Men who are cheating on a woman. Men who would be cheating on a woman if he only could. And as for consorting with hookers, they don't even consider that cheating.
Japanese are not very romantic either, by all accounts. Not a great place for romance, Japan is.
Japanese people are not into imported US-guided BS-feminist morality and Christian values.
A visit to a place where a married man is paying a woman for some sexual favors is not considered as cheating by most Japanese. He likely never sees this woman again anyway, does not know who she is.
About hookers, there are many women into this kind of job and you can find them easily on many Japanese-only webpages.

About romance, I would say still much better for a man in Japan than in Europe or in the States where you have to be worried what all could happen to you if you offer a woman a harmless compliment. Many Japanese women drink a lot when in a group and can be quite talkative and do not feel to be insulted when they hear men to talk men's issues.
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Yohan
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Re: Japanese men share a list of common male woes before and after marriage

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momopi wrote:
March 7th, 2019, 10:07 am
Here’s a recent video on Japanese Giglo. For those who are not familiar they are men working in host bars catering to women. They are the ultimate adaptable social butterfly catering to wide range of clients in the local eco system.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=TuTD0z_Ji_c
This is a very good video with an excellent translation in its subtitles.

It shows how much money some rich girls are willing to spend for a nice evening. However such Japanese women are not mainstream, these are girls from very rich families who don't care about money. Not all women are willing to pay for a male entertainer of course.

The huge majority of Japanese women is not rich like this girl in this interview and are rather modest in their expectations. Just doing a simple job, paying for their own meals, little income and often out of money as they buy too many small items they don't really need, like cheap cosmetics or fake handbags...

We have to be realistic, this guy in the video talks about 3000 male hosts - this sounds to be a lot - but located in well-known Shinjuku Kabuki-cho district, which is full with nightclubs - and Metropolitan Tokyo area (including all suburbs and major cities around) has about 38 million people.

Nothing really new about however, if you compare a report of Japan Times written in 2003, the scene about male hosts exists since long time, it did not really grow, and it did not really decline. Full text click on the link below.
https://www.japantimes.co.jp/community/ ... ISHbE0kl1s
A price on their heads
Japan's hosts are ready and waiting to show the (rich) girls a good time
BY ERIC PRIDEAUX
JAN 12, 2003

Help wanted: Able-bodied, handsome men required to wine and dine as many women as their schedules permit; some extracurricular cosseting may be called for. Educational requirements: None. Salary: Enough to make a salaryman gag.

With a job description like that, it’s little wonder that confident young blades in cities all over the land are lining up to apply for jobs at “host clubs” — those characteristically Japanese bars and restaurants where the male staff do whatever it takes to make their female clientele feel very, very welcome. As in, “Darling, where have you been all my life?” welcome. As in, “Backrub with your bubbly, baby?” welcome.

As far back as the 16th century, there were establishments catering to the desires of women wealthy enough to afford the high cost of men for hire. But while for women of earlier ages the price of a bit of philandering could be ostracism, a nunnery, exile or worse if she was found out, her modern descendants can take their pick of host clubs and party with impunity.

Serving this new breed of female big-spenders are some 3,000 hosts working at 100 clubs in Tokyo’s renowned Kabukicho entertainment district alone. Hosts now also regularly appear on television variety shows, and some write no-holds-barred books on their working lives. In many ways, they are becoming the closest thing to a celebrity that the average woman could ever lay her hands on.
momopi
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Re: Japanese men share a list of common male woes before and after marriage

Post by momopi »

Yohan wrote:
March 9th, 2019, 6:28 pm
momopi wrote:
February 21st, 2019, 11:30 am
I was in Japan a few years back to help a Taiwanese friend move back to LA. She worked for Sony and hit career ceiling, didn’t find a husband so decided to move back to California and work as consultant.
Since she was unsuccessful in relationships there, her opinions are negative. Yohan lives in JP and can probably offer a more balanced view.
If a Taiwan-Chinese woman living in LA, hitting career ceiling and works in Japan and cannot find a husband - then I can only say the problem is 'she' - likely expecting by far too much from Japanese men.

BTW, there is also a significant number of Chinese from Taiwan living in Japan, and she did not even find anyone of her own countrymen for a nice relationship?
She’s the type who blames everyone else but herself. As a favor we flew to Tokyo and helped her move back to LA. She needed a place to stay so we gave her the guest room free, she complained about not being able to find a spouse in japan so we introduced her to our denstist in LA.

She chatted with our dentist from Japan and things looked good, but when she moved back to LA it didn’t work out with him. She blamed us for whatever the reason and stormed off. She didn’t even return the keys. After that we decided to not take in house guests (except family) anymore.

Last I heard she was on local dating sites here in Los Angeles and have several wealthy men offering to be her sugar daddy/husband. Whatever works for her. At least I got to see Tsukiji Fish Market and eat yakitori at Omoide Yokocho (shinjuku).
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Yohan
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Re: Japanese men share a list of common male woes before and after marriage

Post by Yohan »

momopi wrote:
March 12th, 2019, 4:39 pm
Yohan wrote:
March 9th, 2019, 6:28 pm
momopi wrote:
February 21st, 2019, 11:30 am
I was in Japan a few years back to help a Taiwanese friend move back to LA. She worked for Sony and hit career ceiling, didn’t find a husband so decided to move back to California and work as consultant.
Since she was unsuccessful in relationships there, her opinions are negative. Yohan lives in JP and can probably offer a more balanced view.
If a Taiwan-Chinese woman living in LA, hitting career ceiling and works in Japan and cannot find a husband - then I can only say the problem is 'she' - likely expecting by far too much from Japanese men.

BTW, there is also a significant number of Chinese from Taiwan living in Japan, and she did not even find anyone of her own countrymen for a nice relationship?
She’s the type who blames everyone else but herself. As a favor we flew to Tokyo and helped her move back to LA. She needed a place to stay so we gave her the guest room free, she complained about not being able to find a spouse in japan so we introduced her to our denstist in LA.

She chatted with our dentist from Japan and things looked good, but when she moved back to LA it didn’t work out with him. She blamed us for whatever the reason and stormed off. She didn’t even return the keys. After that we decided to not take in house guests (except family) anymore.

Last I heard she was on local dating sites here in Los Angeles and have several wealthy men offering to be her sugar daddy/husband. Whatever works for her. At least I got to see Tsukiji Fish Market and eat yakitori at Omoide Yokocho (shinjuku).
Thank you for this follow-up comment, momopi

This is really about what I expected with this woman - she is not what I consider a Chinese living in Asia, but more an Asian-American woman who expects too much from men. The typical ungrateful US-feminist who takes as much as she can and gives as little as possible in return.

She is not a single case however. Generally said, many women from Singapore, Hongkong, Taiwan and South Korea are often acting highly materialistic and are very self-opinionated, especially those who have rich parents and spent a considerable time overseas for worthless studies in Western countries, like in Canada, USA or UK.

However time is working against such females, they will be forgotten, lonely and dateless past their 40s.

Japanese women are a bit better I think, there is less feminist influence coming in from UK/USA and less influence from Christianity than in places like Singapore, HongKong, Taiwan, South Korea...
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