Update: WE ARE BACK ONLINE! The Forum has been RESTORED! See announcement here. If there are any problems or issues, please report them in the announcement thread. Note: Unfortunately I was not able to import the posts made after the crash (on Sept 18) into the restored forum. However, I exported all the posts submitted after the crash into a Word file, so you can download it, find your posts and re-post them. Download the posts here. Thanks for your patience and welcome back everyone!
Join John Adams, world renowned Intl Matchmaker, Monday nights 8:30 EST for Live Webcasts!
And check out Five Reasons why you should attend a FREE AFA Seminar! See locations and dates here.
View Active Topics View Your Posts Latest 100 Topics FAQ Topics Mobile Friendly Theme
Discuss culture, living, traveling, relocating, dating or anything related to the Asian countries - China, The Philippines, Thailand, etc.
Just wondering if other male members here in the Philippines meet girls alone only or let them bring friends and relatives. It's quite normal for girls to ask if they can bring a friend or relative. I've said OK before and met them in pairs or even three's sometimes, but after comparing my success rate with meeting them alone, I now refuse to meet them unless they come alone. I'm always wondering if I should change that and meet them in pairs again.
Each has it's own pro and cons:
Meeting them with friends and/or relatives means you meet more girls they bring with them, but it means almost no chance of getting them home that time, and it also usually means they expect a meal for all of them, so no thanks. If they only meet you with friends it also shows a lack of self confidence and shyness on their part.
Meeting them alone shows the girl is not scared of meeting foreigners, and has more self confidence and is not shy. It also means if you buy them food it's only them you have to pay for, and of course it also means a much better chance of getting them home alone. The downside is you only meet them and no other potential cute girls.
I've only scored a few times with girls I met with friends or relatives, while I've scored many times that number with girls I met alone.
The whole bringing a friend and relative thing always annoys me because it just smells of shyness and no confidence on their part, something a lot of Filipinas have. I usually tell them sorry I only meet girls alone, and if other girls did it you can too.
Curious to other members opinions and success rate compared to meeting girls alone.
I've never been to the Philippines, but I read that it is the custom for people (or maybe women) to ask someone to go along if they go somewhere. Traditionally, married women aren't supposed to leave the home much, and if they do, they may bring someone. Part of it may be safety. It may also be a kind of chaperone thing. If going with someone is a 'good girl' type of thing, then it may be a good sign. The downside is that a grew of girls may be looking for free coffee and meals. That can happen in the US, but usually not in groups. The friends may also be hoping for you to have some other white friends.
I'd be interested to find out from other readers if the type of girl who won't meet a man alone is more likely to be a virgin, saving herself for marriage, and the type of girl who would meet a man alone the first time, might be a 'good girl' or could likely be the type of guy who would sleep with a man who isn't her husband. If these girls are sleeping with you, they may have been willing to be the biological material disposal ground for dozens of guys before you, and their diseases.
It is very doubtful that a girl willing to meet a man alone the first time they have met is a virgin. Extremely unlikely. A girl with any standards in the Philippines will not meet a man alone the first time they meet. If the poster had any knowledge or interest in Philippines culture, he would be well aware.
He comes across as so self-absorbed that he may not care. At any rate, a sex tourist would want a girl
to be willing to meet him alone, the poster is correct, as this would indicate better game for a sex tourist- a girl with lower moral standards and poor judgement.
I and my wife of course have many Filipinas around, and we would advise any decent Filipina to cross any man off her list who would insist on meeting her alone. It's a sure fire monger/sex tourist flag.
its also a sign of low maturity and very boring person if they do NOT want to meet alone in my opinion. What kind of woman wants to meet a guy with another girl around? were not talking about to the hotel room. if hes inviting directly to the room then well yeah your gonna get obvious low fruit. You say its low character but how did your mother meet your dad? Im pretty damn sure it wasn't with her friends hanging around. and things were very traditional back then.
Besides the issue of safety or a traditional chaperone, what isn't being understood here is that the Philippines is a highly communal culture. No one (let alone a young woman) does anything alone. My wife is 26 and before living with me had NEVER had a meal alone in her life. She's still adjusting to the idea of eating lunch alone.
So girls in the Philippines do not go out alone, to the movies alone, to dinner alone, to the mall alone, etc.
Will N claims (and I respect him for this) that he tells the girls he is chatting with what he is interested in - and it ain't going out for an ice cream soda
If you want an easy lay and don't care about anything else, then by all means demand that she meet you alone; a certain amount will. But if you want to meet a good girl, a smarter than average girl, an educated girl, or a hotter than average girl, then you should expect to adjust to the girl and the culture.
OTOH, if as Outwest suggests a guy is just a sex tourist looking for the next lay, then I would encourage her not to meet him at all - with or without chaperone.
I have many Filipina friends who are good girls. A few of them have asked if I had a foreigner friend for them to meet. Unfortunately, most of the time I don't since most of the single guys in PI seem to be closer to the sex tourist methodology than the marrying methodology. And don't get me wrong - I have nothing morally against sex tourists or p4p fans - but I wouldn't introduce them to my wife's sister (who's 20 and attractive).
In all fairness I will say that for good or bad the chaperone thing is starting to change, so it is possible now to meet a good girl in a public place without an entourage. But if she is at all interested in you she will want you to meet her family and friends soon afterwards. And that's what a non-sex tourist should do.
Very, very wisely said.
My Mom and Dad aren't Filippinos. Are yours? Are most posters?
I don't know enough about Filippines culture to know if virgins in the city might meet a man alone for the first time, but I wouldn't be surprised if SOME virgins from traditional families with high sexual morals would refuse to meet a man alone. If a man is a whoremonger looking for some action, a girl not meeting him alone the first time may be a way to weed out the good girls and focus on the girls of lesser virtue. I'm guessing at the culture there.
If it's the custom to meet with a chaperon, then I'd say it's a good thing for a man looking for a girl with good morals.
As far as confidence goes, and a girl not meeting a man alone being a sign of a lack of confidence, who cares? Are we a bunch of chicks? If a man wants a 'confident' woman he can marry a strong, independent woman in the US. Women are attracted to confidence in males. I can see not wanting to be with someone extremely afraid or shy, but I don't get why a little feminine timidity, feigned or real, would be a deal breaker.
Why do men want to date Asian women from Asia but then expect them not to do things that are feminine in their own culture? Why not just date in the US? Why go all the way over there and expect the women to act like they do at home? I've read that Filippinas usually shop, travel, etc. with at least one other person. Traditionally, it is probably for safety, but some of it may have to do with modesty/virtue type issues, too.
I can understand why a shy man would not want to meet multiple women at the same time. I could see how women could use that to test a man's confidence, too. If a man is too shy to meet her with a group or one other friend, then he may not be manly enough for her, either. I also understand why whoremongers might avoid it.
You are nailing it here my friend...
How does one manage to dump so many girls without getting in trouble or feeling any guilt?
I'd love to have harems like this but I would probably hesitate or feel guilty for dumping someone abruptly. I know WnD doesn't respond to posts, but can someone elaborate? do you just tell them flat out you're bored, or do you just stop responding to their calls/text? Or a are these girls so carefree that it's no big deal?
I know a guy in South America that would pump and dump just like that; he said he stopped responding to their calls until they would quit.
Sounds wrong, but I'd like to be more like that, less sentimental and stuff.
1)Too much of one thing defeats the purpose.
2)Everybody is full of it. What's your hypocrisy?
They were already sloppy seconds by the time Will got them. No decent girl in the Phils is going to meet a man alone for a "date." There are tons of sluts and even hookers that will give it away for for free to a foreigner. These are the types he is getting. No quality girl is going to meet a "kano" alone unless she wants sex. Will wants the highest quality women but only wants sex. So in other words he wants to ruin women (seriously, this is what p4p is for) and probably believes it doesn't count if he goes to a pro. Then he complains about not being able to get the most quality women. It's bullshit.
I believe I mentioned this another thread once. A lot of expats in the Philippines are boning the same chicks over and over again. The filipinas who go after foreign men consist of a pool and a lot of people are dipping into the same pool. So the guy Will N. Dowd f***ed probably got passed around by the Rooshv guys and a few other manosphere forum guys as well. Everyone is basically using Filipino cupid. Even though there are a lot of filipinas it's not all that rare for people to be hitting up the same girls.
I remember meeting one girl and when she got in that comfort zone with me she started talking to me about all the foreigners she met. A few of them were obviously manosphere guys. She's been around the block and wasn't even afraid to admit that. I passed on her, but I don't think this sort of thing is uncommon.
It's OK with me if she wants to bring one chaperone, but only on the first date.
One girl actually brought along THREE of her friends when she met me. Of course I had to pay for all of their meals and entertainment. I couldn't dump her fast enough.
Here's another funny chaperone story: I went out with a girl, "Jane", and her chaperone. Later on, the chaperone sent me a Facebook message saying that she wanted me for herself. She wrote "Forget Jane. I want you to tear me apart". I found it flattering, yet creepy. I cut off contact with both Jane and the chaperone.