China is much much worse than America in terms of dating.

Seeker · Post by **Seeker** » March 24th, 2013, 6:06 am

That sounds ok then, but it is a little strange that you'd opt to study in Asia rather than work especially at your age.

If you're a guy in a hurry though, then don't come to China. It's *incredibly* hard to do anything here due to the language barrier. Well I just got back from the supermarket having not been allowed to buy an apple. Was the fruit old? Did I not buy enough? Are foreigners banned from buying fruit? Who knows - 5 weeks of intensive Mandarin lessons and I still couldn't understand a single word the checkout assistant was speaking.

You were probably meant to have the fruit weighed and stamped before you took it to the checkout till. Also, are you sure she was speaking Mandarin and not Cantonese?

xiongmao · Post by **xiongmao** » March 24th, 2013, 7:23 am

On the studying, well unless you're like Winston and have some connection to China then it's gigantically hard to get a long term visa to stay here. Studying is by far the easiest option, plus it's useful for my own personal career to come and see what Higher Education is like out here. Not to mention the fact that most Chinese ladies don't speak English.

Only work if you need money. If you don't need money, then go and enjoy yourself.

On the fruit, well who knows. Strange experiences in shops and restaurants are very common in China, customer service is way behind the USA or Japan. But oddly enough I've just been chatting to a Chinese Love Links girl and it turns out she lives less than a mile from me. Maybe we can do language exchange in the supermarket or something. Also her legs are very white - Winston would definitely approve.

As to the other poster, sure Chinese women have problems. I mean I saw people fighting each other to get on a bus here today, and the bus wasn't even full. It's a dog eat dog world here, so don't come here if you're laid back and want a quiet life. In fact even my date from Shenzhen thought it was too busy here in Guangzhou. I never saw anywhere in Shanghai as busy as it is here.

momopi · Post by **momopi** » March 26th, 2013, 12:08 pm

Customer service in Hong Kong back in 1990's:

Guy walks into a department store, sales person shows him a new electric razor shaver, have him try it to see how good it is. Then he puts it back in the box and rings it up at the register. Guy says "hey I didn't say I would buy it". Sales guy says "you already used it, who else is going to buy it? You use it, you buy it".

Guy's wife walks into the clothing section of the department store, ask to try on a dress. Saleslady replies "if you buy it, yes, you can try it on".

LoL.

I'll be in HK in June. Not sure if I'll have time to go to Shenzhen, but will try to finally visit Macao for the first time.

celery2010 · Post by **celery2010** » March 26th, 2013, 1:08 pm

Finding girls in China takes a bit of work compared to most other places. You're not going to meet a girl on the street or in a nightclub generally.

China is overpopulated so people don't seem to trust strangers.

But you're wrong in that (some) girls in China are not interested in meeting foreigners.

You have to find the right circumstances in which to meet them and no, not all girls will be interested in meeting foreigners, but with over a billion people.....

I think, overall, it will probably be easier to meet women in SE Asia compared to China, but one can also do extremely well in China, and many girls are uncorrupted, very much girl next door, very sweet, "good" girls.

green1976 · Post by **green1976** » March 26th, 2013, 2:30 pm

Opening an online dating account for China and the Philippines are the next step i'm taking.
Let's see what the results there compared to what i'm getting in Thailand.

I'm not expecting better result for China to the contrary of the Phillipines where i think i should beat the Thai stats.
I will use the same pictures,i will contact the same number and similar profiles i've done for Thailand.
I will check how many women will contact me first,what they will say,the percentage of those who are flaky...

xiongmao · Post by **xiongmao** » March 27th, 2013, 6:05 am

I know guys who have met Chinese girls in the street. All it takes is confidence to talk to them, even if your Mandarin is rubbish.

Loads of girls here want Western husbands - I know because I was with my last Chinese gf in the suburbs and she told me lots of the girls in the boutique shops we went in liked the idea of finding Western husbands.

It's easy to find a Chinese gf, but if you want to date a really hot girl then you'll need to put in a lot of effort in wooing her.

Hmmm, I'm working on the hot girls. It's just so hard to come here and work/study and keep on top of the mosquito/roach/other everyday problems AND have time to woo the hottest ladies.

On top of that the language(s) are just so incredibly hard to learn here. I mean we're studying "standard" "Mandarin" in my class but who really speaks that here? Nobody really. For example today I noticed a shop assistant saying something completely non-standard to me. And the announcer on the bus doesn't give the name of my favourite shopping mall in standard Mandarin either.

And momopi - I've heard you can get a 3 day visa that's good for the Shenzhen economic zone (maybe Guangzhou as well). Well I should be here in June so I could pop down and see you wherever you are. Macau's a bit easier to visit (and cheaper).

Anyway, who ever comes here, you'll find the ladies are way, way hotter when you cross the border into the mainland. Cantonese girls are lovely though, and I reckon they're the best ones to look for.

The_Adventurer · Post by **The_Adventurer** » March 27th, 2013, 9:44 pm

I get sick of these threads with someone judging CHINA, one of the hugest countries in the world, by the ONE SPOT they happen to have visited. I live in a place where the pace of.life is slow, lazy, and the girls are more friendly than Philippines. It is night and day compared to Beijing or Shanghai.

Xiongmao, you're in Guangzhou! I think I wrote before about the website I saw that featured some of the ugliest Africans imagineable, and they all bad hot girls and THEY HAD BABIES.

My wife showed me an article about a guy in his 50's, overweight and had aspergers, and he had a hot 24 year old girlfriend who worked and took care him. She went on an on about how he is SOOO KIND and that he is everything in her life.

I saw an old ass French dude, not bad looking but old, with a hot girl on the train. They looked like a real couple to my eyes, rather than P4P.

Then again, the OP is already talking about KTV girls anyway. Of course he is wasting his time. Get out and talk to some real girls. They will be happy to help you with the language. I mentioned before than EVERY eatery I visited regularly had some staff member, or two, who wanted me. Got free food and snacks a lot. Then again, I'm DAMN GOOD LOOKING.

The_Hero_of_Men · Post by **The_Hero_of_Men** » March 28th, 2013, 8:58 am

The_Adventurer wrote:I get sick of these threads with someone judging CHINA, one of the hugest countries in the world, by the ONE SPOT they happen to have visited. I live in a place where the pace of.life is slow, lazy, and the girls are more friendly than Philippines. It is night and day compared to Beijing or Shanghai.

Xiongmao, you're in Guangzhou! I think I wrote before about the website I saw that featured some of the ugliest Africans imagineable, and they all bad hot girls and THEY HAD BABIES.

My wife showed me an article about a guy in his 50's, overweight and had aspergers, and he had a hot 24 year old girlfriend who worked and took care him. She went on an on about how he is SOOO KIND and that he is everything in her life.

I saw an old a** French dude, not bad looking but old, with a hot girl on the train. They looked like a real couple to my eyes, rather than P4P.

Then again, the OP is already talking about KTV girls anyway. Of course he is wasting his time. Get out and talk to some real girls. They will be happy to help you with the language. I mentioned before than EVERY eatery I visited regularly had some staff member, or two, who wanted me. Got free food and snacks a lot. Then again, I'm DAMN GOOD LOOKING.

What's up man! Long time no see! I finally got my passport, and I am considering Mexico when I have completed my Associate's Degree. Can I potentially PM a picture of me to you so you can make a good estimate on how I would do in China if I ever went there.

The_Adventurer · Post by **The_Adventurer** » March 28th, 2013, 5:06 pm

Sure Hero. Feel free, but I think you needn't worry. I mentioned the website featuring African male/Chinese female couples. Some of these dudes faces need help, AND they got no job and no visa, but they got hot girls.

The Professor · Post by **The Professor** » March 29th, 2013, 1:05 am

The_Adventurer wrote:
Then again, the OP is already talking about KTV girls anyway. Of course he is wasting his time. Get out and talk to some real girls.

I've talked to plenty of real girls here. Also I never even talked to a KTV girl, and I think you completely missed the point of me bringing them up. I only brought them up as the fact that many men are lonely enough to pay a woman to sit down and talk to them emphasizes how bad things are in this country.

The_Adventurer wrote:Sure Hero. Feel free, but I think you needn't worry. I mentioned the website featuring African male/Chinese female couples. Some of these dudes faces need help, AND they got no job and no visa, but they got hot girls.

So you really think these couples are typical here in China? I've lived here for almost a year and I have seen a lot of foreigners and I have never seen an African male with a Chinese girlfriend. While we're at it I have also never seen an Indian male or an Arab male with a Chinese girlfriend. I rarely see ugly guys of any race with girlfriends, let alone ugly guys who pull above their weight. On the other hand, seriously unattractive chinese women pulling above their weight seems to be pretty common here.

The fact of the matter is those couples you saw on whatever website you saw were bizarre, one in ten million exceptions. That's why they were featured on that website, because things like that are so uncommon that they're shocking, so they grab your attention.

xiongmao · Post by **xiongmao** » March 29th, 2013, 2:57 am

Hi The_Adventurer - which city are you in? Sometimes I think that Guangzhou is just too crazy and that I'd be better off in a 3rd tier city like Changsha. Changsha would be my choice because I like Hunan food and also I know of so many Western men who have married Hunan girls.

To be honest I've seen very few foreigners with Chinese gf's/wives this time around in China. Of the English teachers in my University, I only know of one with a Chinese gf. Most wealthy expats I see in Tianhe have Western wives and sometimes kids as well.

I have seen an Indian man with a Chinese wife (and they had a very strange looking mixed baby).

From what I've seen, the local black men (and there are a lot in Guangzhou) tend to have black wives.

I've not seen an Arab man with a Chinese wife. My Arab friend doesn't actually like Asian women, so I don't know if any others think the same way.

One downside I'm finding in Guangzhou is that everyone is so busy it's so hard to schedule in dates. Grrr. The stupid thing is that most companies here are so stupendously overstaffed so they're delusional if they think they're as busy as a Western person in the same job would be. If I go in McDonalds I never tidy my tray away as it gives somebody something to do.

But back to dating and if I can ever find a window in their schedules then I've got a couple of dates lined up with two very nice women indeed. The problem is that they live in Shenzhen and ladies in that city seem to be the busiest in the whole of China.

Teal Lantern · Post by **Teal Lantern** » March 29th, 2013, 9:32 am

The_Hero_of_Men wrote: What's up man! Long time no see! I finally got my passport, and I am considering Mexico when I have completed my Associate's Degree. Can I potentially PM a picture of me to you so you can make a good estimate on how I would do in China if I ever went there.

http://www.afroshanghai.com/forums/inde ... ,74.0.html
A country of 1/2 billion women and you're worried about catching one?

Let one get hold of you, in a few years, you'll be trying to figure out how to escape her.

The Professor · Post by **The Professor** » March 29th, 2013, 5:57 pm

Teal Lantern wrote: A country of 1/2 billion women and you're worried about catching one?

The fact that there are "1/2 billion women" in China means nothing, since there are a lot more men than women. The ratio is what's important, and China has the worst gender ratio out of any other country on the face of the earth due to the one child policy and almost all babies being adopted from china being female.

http://www.prb.org/Articles/2012/china- ... males.aspx

Poston's research finds that between 1983 and 2010, the imbalanced sex ratio at birth in China has resulted in a surplus of 40 million males who will be unable to find appropriately aged Chinese women to marry.

This inevitably has resulted in women having many options no matter what they look like, men having few or none and becoming extremely desperate, and women getting super picky and having a lot of power over men. Even as someone who doesn't speak chinese, these social dynamics have been very apparent to me.

Teal Lantern · Post by **Teal Lantern** » March 29th, 2013, 6:25 pm

The Professor wrote:
Teal Lantern wrote: A country of 1/2 billion women and you're worried about catching one?
The fact that there are "1/2 billion women" in China means nothing, since there are a lot more men than women. The ratio is what's important, and China has the worst gender ratio out of any other country on the face of the earth due to the one child policy and almost all babies being adopted from china being female.

http://www.prb.org/Articles/2012/china- ... males.aspx

Poston's research finds that between 1983 and 2010, the imbalanced sex ratio at birth in China has resulted in a surplus of 40 million males who will be unable to find appropriately aged Chinese women to marry.

This inevitably has resulted in women having many options no matter what they look like, men having few or none and becoming extremely desperate, and women getting super picky and having a lot of power over men. Even as someone who doesn't speak chinese, these social dynamics have been very apparent to me.

Yes, I'm aware of the gender imbalance. I was considering other factors.
Foreign men can get a certain boost simply from their own novelty.
Western men are more charitable in the age & weight they'll accept before labeling a women as "too old" or "too fat".
They also have tastes that can run different to what local men may consider attractive.
Consider what he settled for back home. Yes, the girls can get a local, but a Westerner requires so much less "work".
Meanwhile, the local men might rather import a less troublesome (and less calorically enhanced) girl from Vietnam.

xiongmao · Post by **xiongmao** » March 29th, 2013, 7:13 pm

I must post more photos of Chinese brides. Almost to a woman they're stick thin, whereas the majority of Western men like girls with curves.

The local men here have such different standards of beauty. Plus I'm now chatting to a couple of divorced women, one of whom has a kid. It's exceedingly rare for Chinese guys to want to marry divorced women, especially those with kids.

It is hard work finding dates here. This is mostly down to Chinese ladies being exceedingly busy, plus they're quite shy and won't often make the first move. The language and cultural barriers are significant. Just trying to set up a date with a girl who doesn't understand English is hard enough.

OK so I'll admit that now I'm living here my standards are exceedingly high. But I'm here for a while, so I can take my time.

Finally because foreigners are so rare here, and mixed couples even more rare, most Chinese women just haven't considered the idea of finding a foreign husband. It's much like I was in 2008 - I didn't think to look for an Asian gf because I thought you could only find them in Thailand and that Thai girls only liked much older men. Well how wrong was I?