Happier Abroad Forum Community

I am going to vietnam to meet a group of vietnamese girls who I am being introduced to by my aunt and uncles in vietnam. I am vietnamese myself and I am looking for a vietnamese wife. I had a hard time finding a vietnamese american woman here in america to marry me so my family is helping me out. I am wondering what should I expect when I meet her as I am nervous myself. What should I expect when I meet them ? What kind of questions would they ask ?

In college I dated a Vietnamese girl for 2 years from San Jose, CA area. During this time I met her friends, family and extended friends and family too. They were nice and hospitable, but very simple and narrow. You couldn't have any deep conversation with them. Some of the girls I met were friendly and talkative to me, others were shy and ignored me and had nothing to say to me, and some were in between, they'd talk to me occasionally but only superficially. I never felt any genuine deep connection with them. They were kind of shallow and materialistic and into cliques and social image, which is typical of Californians. But overall, they were friendlier than white people in CA at least, and not as cold or serious or strict or uptight as the Chinese community. More laid back. Not as strict or serious as Chinese Americans. They also smiled a lot more too. A little like Filipinos but more practical and smarter. They were like somewhere in between Chinese and Filipinos.

Also, my girlfriend's uncle was a bit annoying though, he kept talking down to me as if I was stupid and knew nothing. He tried to make me feel small, like a naive child who didn't know anything. I didn't like that. I don't think he meant anything bad toward me, it was just his style and way. When I tried to convince him that I wasn't as dumb as he thought, he ignored me and never changed his attitude toward me. That was a bit weird. I don't like it when people make you feel small and incompetent, even if they think they mean well. It's like they pick you because you're nice and an easy target. It's a form of passive bullying it seems. I don't know why he thought that I was stupid and naive, I never gave him any indication of that. Some people just think that of me for some reason, by just looking at me. I seem to attract them. Maybe it's because I have a childlike innocent and naivete, which is true, but it doesn't mean I'm stupid, I'm just on a different wavelength than the typical Asian conformists and workaholics who are super practical and live only to work. Some Asians don't like it when I'm not like others and so they call me immature and naive and childish, as if I refused to grow up by "their standards", when I simply have different standards and refuse to conform to their reality or their world. That's one of the reasons I don't get along with a lot of Asians.

I also did not like Vietnamese language. It sounded a big ghetto and strange. And their food wasn't very good either. Very little vegetarian options and they don't respect vegetarian lifestyles and see it as abnormal. As I said, they are narrow and small minded, which is typical of Asians. I also hated that they eat this egg thing with an aborted chicken fetus inside, like Filipinos do. Disgusting.

Btw, this is based on my experience with the Vietnamese connected to my ex-gf in San Jose, CA. I don't know if the Vietnamese in Vietnam are like that or not. I'd imagine they'd be similar, since like the Chinese, the Vietnamese in America have their own cliques and communities so they don't have to conform to American culture or try to act American.