From what I've observed, Asian Americans often have mixed feelings about their experiences in Asia. One Korean American explains why he moved back to America:
"I came to Seoul 10 months ago... got a job at private hagwon... big and established... got paid about $4500 a month... and hated it...
There's so many reasons why I like Korea, but reasons why I don't like it are more pronounced, and it was enough for me to quit my job and come back to America.
Several reasons why I left and probably never coming back... please don't judge, just my experience....
1. Judgmental/Shallowness
I'm a gyopo, so I kind of got lucky to get a sneak into Korean culture by hanging out with various Korean people and listen to conversations, etc....
And I realize that Korean people in general have materialism and shallowness as their base outlook on life. Yes, I know there aren't people like that but in general, in Seoul, shit is all about how you look, how much money you make, how superior you are (in career, friendship) etc... not to say it isn't in LA or NY, but here in Seoul it takes a more crass and unsophisticated approach to it all... hence why I realize to Koreans commercials featuring celebrity is a big deal...
2. Rudeness/Arrogant
This saddens me. Koreans are rude/arrogant. You can argue with me otherwise but I truly believe the stress of people living in Seoul makes them hollow and isolated... and rude and mean. When people are like this collectively, it stresses you out.
3. People Aren't Happy.
Just ride the subway. I've ridden subways in NY, Spain, Paris, LA, Sacramento... and no where are people more sullen and lifeless than in Seoul. Wifi and cleanliness don't matter when the people, the culture you're within isn't feeling the good feels... Yea, as a tourist, it may be so wonderful and amazing, new experiences,, but as a lifer, grinding and living, you start to see that people are generally... not happy Sad
4. XENOPHOBIA.... racism... I don't even know.
Even as a gyopo, I sensed xenophobia.. not from everyone but let's say about 1/4 of people I met. People are extremely standoffish/rude if your Korean falters... but as soon as you bring out your English they get all giggly kind of nice, intimidated... I hate that... why can't you just be open from the get-go and why the heck are you suddenly nice when I speak English? Just don't understand....
5. Appearances
This is a more personal factor. Appearances are huge in Seoul. People dress too well. I'm not saying I don't care about my look but It stressed me out many times because I always felt I had to look good before I went out. ALL THE TIME.
6. Kids/Parents
Srs... not worth it. No respect to teachers. I realized that there was no way I could stand taking abuse of my integrity and intelligence to placate parents and students. I felt pathetic for being a little bitch for hagwon/parents/students to prevent them from quitting. Many times parents complained that my classes were too hard or students made up bs stories saying I was going to fast, etc. In the end, I was responsible for all these things.... coming from a consulting bg, I realized I didn't need to deal with this...
7. Education system
It's all about memorizing stuff. Not really improving critical thinking in English. I started to go crazy teaching the same crap over and over again. I realized hagwon wanted me to just teach whatever book they had and didn't want me to test students mind and help them think independently.....
I would get odd stares when I tried to have the kids voice out their personal hypothetical solutions to challenges/ideas/etc... they just want the answers and A... only some kids that lived abroad understood what I was saying...
8. Collectivism vs Individualism
This is a land where standing out is a big no no... There is no such thing as rewarding uniqueness or pursuing individuality... People strive to work together here, pursue a solution for the common group... Sacrifice individualism for the group... I realized how this stressed me as I took granted the varying freedom of experiences I had living in other parts of the world..."
http://forums.eslcafe.com/korea/viewtopic.php?t=236047
But I realize that having better dating opportunities can do a lot to make up for the negatives. Men did not evolve to be happy without female companionship.