Most American guys can be just as toxic as the women.

[Mercury]

It is said on this website that American women are toxic, spoiled, hateful, and paranoid. Unfortunately at the same time, many American guys can be just as toxic as women in that they are highly possessive of women they are in a relationship with and get defensive and even aggressive towards other guys who approach the couple.

[Nailer]

From the things you have written, I would become highly defensive if you came near me.

[Eric]

People like to live in delusion. It's hard to see ourselves as we really are, with things wrong with us. And there are things wrong with each one of us, no one is perfect. We've all got problems. People like to pretend they're perfect - it's a defense and a way of adapting to life to make do, make the best of our situation; most of it happens subconsciously. But, we get used to seeing the world and things as i we're not the one with the problem - it's a form of blindness...

We've adapted the world around us, around our perceptions. That's why it helps to have accurate perception, this is something anyone can have. It's called "owning it" and seeing clearly, not making deceptions, rationalizations or excuses. It's choosing to see things the way they are; imperfections, faults and all. That's the complete whole of us.
Americans are bad at this and are particularly thick, and almost unbearable. Because American society is so completely insane and out of balance. People are hard to be around, almost any contact is toxic contact around large public places. Americans are so defensive because there's a lot wrong with them, and a lot of delusion and excuses.

[Man With a Plan]

People like to live in delusion. It's hard to see ourselves as we really are, with things wrong with us. And there are things wrong with each one of us, no one is perfect. We've all got problems. People like to pretend they're perfect - it's a defense and a way of adapting to life to make do, make the best of our situation; most of it happens subconsciously. But, we get used to seeing the world and things as i we're not the one with the problem - it's a form of blindness...

We've adapted the world around us, around our perceptions. That's why it helps to have accurate perception, this is something anyone can have. It's called "owning it" and seeing clearly, not making deceptions, rationalizations or excuses. It's choosing to see things the way they are; imperfections, faults and all. That's the complete whole of us.

Americans are bad at this and are particularly thick, and almost unbearable. Because American society is so completely insane and out of balance. People are hard to be around, almost any contact is toxic contact around large public places. Americans are so defensive because there's a lot wrong with them, and a lot of delusion and excuses.

With that hefty pile of truth, I think that's the show. The ego is not your amigo.

[Adama]

It is said on this website that American women are toxic, spoiled, hateful, and paranoid. Unfortunately at the same time, many American guys can be just as toxic as women in that they are highly possessive of women they are in a relationship with and get defensive and even aggressive towards other guys who approach the couple.

There's nothing toxic about that. Most men would probably not want another man around them and their woman.

[Eric]

I've found that with dating here, just like everything else in America - nothing's natural. You have to put in legwork to get girls, talk to them. Nothing feels natural or happens natural here (because all the natural processes have been disrupted...) so you can't rely and wait on things to happen. you can get a lot of girls if you go out and try - but none of it's worth anything. They are like Wal Mart here, pick one off the shelf, take her for a spin. Next. Next. next. That's how it is here. You have to have initiative, drive.
You can't sit back and wait for things to naturally happen, like the strategy would be and work in other countries, or naturally. Where you would just see a girl you like, make eye contact....court her and flirt. That rarely happens here, for some reason. It's because you like them or want to be nice - girls and guys are conditioned - socially conditioned to act weirdly, like that's not allowed here. Everybodies so socially conditioned not to be able or receptive to talking. It's like being forward is not allowed - you have to be independent. And if you just approach someone they'll think you're weird. You have to go through the motions, jump through some hoops. Act, like put on a show and follow protocol. You have to go through a weird act.

That's the U.S.A., everything feels like an effort, and it is. You'll never likely escape that living here...

That's hard to explain but that's definitely the difference between U.S.A. and other places. There are almost so many women around you get sick of them, they all look and act the same after a while - it's too much; and you end up somehow resenting each other. That's how contact has gotten so coarse for me.
I've thought about joining the Peace Corps so that I could get out of here into a saner and more meaningful, better environment. After that, bridge-way into a new job through contacts in that part or other parts of the world.

[WorldTraveler]

It is said on this website that American women are toxic, spoiled, hateful, and paranoid. Unfortunately at the same time, many American guys can be just as toxic as women in that they are highly possessive of women they are in a relationship with and get defensive and even aggressive towards other guys who approach the couple.

Mercury, are you a women? Why would you say something like this? Have you ever been in a relationship in America? Do you want other guys coming up to you hitting on your girlfriend and trying to pick her up. I don't want this and many guys are pests. If you don't mind sharing your girl with other guys, please share her with me because I'm short of a good woman now.

The title of you post makes a lot of sense: "Most american guys can be just as toxic as the women." I 100% agree with this. It is almost impossible now to find a man in America who wants to be your friend and work with you to better both of your lives. America is a very competitive country and most men think they are in competition with you. Jealousy is their number one driving emotion. They can't be your friend because they are jealous of you. If you tell friends of any of your success or happiness, you can lose them. I've had friends create fictional lives just to one up me. I no longer tell most guys anything about what I do, thus to avoid jealous bullshit.

[Adama]

most men think they are in competition with you. Jealousy is their number one driving emotion. They can't be your friend because they are jealous of you. If you tell friends of any of your success or happiness, you can lose them. I've had friends create fictional lives just to one up me. I no longer tell most guys anything about what I do, thus to avoid jealous bullshit.

I've been trying to convey a similar message to the men here. But most of them blamed me. Some people are incapable of understanding such things (competition with false friends because they're jealous and hateful). However there are some people who want to insure they don't get exposed as the jealous spiritual murderers they are. So they deny this happens, but if it does, it is your fault.

[Mercury]

It is said on this website that American women are toxic, spoiled, hateful, and paranoid. Unfortunately at the same time, many American guys can be just as toxic as women in that they are highly possessive of women they are in a relationship with and get defensive and even aggressive towards other guys who approach the couple.

There's nothing toxic about that. Most men would probably not want another man around them and their woman.

It's worse than that. Most American guys even hate the idea of, for example, a get-together involving him, his girlfriend/fiancée/wife, and another guy who is a friend of hers. For most, an absence of flirting is still no good; the boyfriend/fiancée/husband wants at least 75 feet or more of personal space with other guys.

[Adama]

It is said on this website that American women are toxic, spoiled, hateful, and paranoid. Unfortunately at the same time, many American guys can be just as toxic as women in that they are highly possessive of women they are in a relationship with and get defensive and even aggressive towards other guys who approach the couple.

There's nothing toxic about that. Most men would probably not want another man around them and their woman.

It's worse than that. Most American guys even hate the idea of, for example, a get-together involving him, his girlfriend/fiancée/wife, and another guy who is a friend of hers. For most, an absence of flirting is still no good; the boyfriend/fiancée/husband wants at least 75 feet or more of personal space with other guys.

That's because the same concept still applies. Nobody wants some single guy around. I'd be surprised if you could maintain such a relationship unless you had a woman of your own to bring around.

[wingfeather]

Seeing as how the majority of American men who "cold approach" me turn out to be gay, I also have become adverse to random men striking up conversation. The other times strange men start conversations with me is when they have an agenda (want some money, selling something).

My guess is many other guys have become adverse to other men approaching them because of this, not because they dont want friends.

[Mercury]

It is said on this website that American women are toxic, spoiled, hateful, and paranoid. Unfortunately at the same time, many American guys can be just as toxic as women in that they are highly possessive of women they are in a relationship with and get defensive and even aggressive towards other guys who approach the couple.

There's nothing toxic about that. Most men would probably not want another man around them and their woman.

It's worse than that. Most American guys even hate the idea of, for example, a get-together involving him, his girlfriend/fiancée/wife, and another guy who is a friend of hers. For most, an absence of flirting is still no good; the boyfriend/fiancée/husband wants at least 75 feet or more of personal space with other guys.

That's because the same concept still applies. Nobody wants some single guy around. I'd be surprised if you could maintain such a relationship unless you had a woman of your own to bring around.

So in other words, you're telling me that it is absolutely wrong and even immoral worldwide, not just in America, for guys to have friends that are female who are in a relationship with, or married to, another man. In other words, you're telling me that if I find out that my favorite waitress for instance has a boyfriend; flee from her, block her from my Facebook, stay permanently away from her place of work, cut her out of my life, write her off, never ever go to that restaurant ever again, even stay at least 5 miles or more away from that restaurant, if I see her, pretend that her boyfriend/fiancée/husband even has a bomb and run away from her as if he's close by and about to detonate, pretend that she even has a restraining order already on me.

[Eric]

Seeing as how the majority of American men who "cold approach" me turn out to be gay, I also have become adverse to random men striking up conversation. The other times strange men start conversations with me is when they have an agenda (want some money, selling something).

My guess is many other guys have become adverse to other men approaching them because of this, not because they dont want friends.

The main thing I put it down to is victim culture. Anything can happen to you - you have to not make contingency a factor by not being victimized. The truth is that life is hard, and human beings take constant work.

[Nailer]

It is said on this website that American women are toxic, spoiled, hateful, and paranoid. Unfortunately at the same time, many American guys can be just as toxic as women in that they are highly possessive of women they are in a relationship with and get defensive and even aggressive towards other guys who approach the couple.

There's nothing toxic about that. Most men would probably not want another man around them and their woman.

It's worse than that. Most American guys even hate the idea of, for example, a get-together involving him, his girlfriend/fiancée/wife, and another guy who is a friend of hers. For most, an absence of flirting is still no good; the boyfriend/fiancée/husband wants at least 75 feet or more of personal space with other guys.

That's because the same concept still applies. Nobody wants some single guy around. I'd be surprised if you could maintain such a relationship unless you had a woman of your own to bring around.

So in other words, you're telling me that it is absolutely wrong and even immoral worldwide, not just in America, for guys to have friends that are female who are in a relationship with, or married to, another man. In other words, you're telling me that if I find out that my favorite waitress for instance has a boyfriend; flee from her, block her from my Facebook, stay permanently away from her place of work, cut her out of my life, write her off, never ever go to that restaurant ever again, even stay at least 5 miles or more away from that restaurant, if I see her, pretend that her boyfriend/fiancée/husband even has a bomb and run away from her as if he's close by and about to detonate, pretend that she even has a restraining order already on me.

A waitress is not your friend. She's paid to be nice to you. She doesn't have any choice to not talk to you, otherwise she probably wouldn't.

[yick]

American men/women - two sides of the same coin. It should go without saying that it's cultural.